Group 7-day waking average?

Good morning everyone. First up!

BG 5.7

Yesterday was tough and to make things harder my wife was not answering her phone. She did this last time, cut me off completely after she had got what she wanted. Sigh.

When she rang the day before she was engaging, interested, positive,.... but looking back I realise it was because she was in manipulating mode, and wanted me to talk to the doctors to get her home early/like now. This happened last time but I fell for it (I am such a sucker) and between us all managed to get her home early as she promised to always take her meds to the consultant who also believed her, and, she promised before God (very significant for her). When she got home ... Was she impressed? Was she grateful? Was she happy? Was she well? No! She regressed back to her 'negative' self and we had a very difficult time. However, This time I am not so easily fooled/manipulated and she will stay in hospital until the doctors agree to let her go home. It could be weeks. It could be months. But I will not interfere, especially as I really don't know what I am doing. But it is tough and very painful.

Today? I really don't know. I just want to go hide in a cupboard and shut everything out. It's not like me. I used to have a saying 'everything is fixable'. A positive mantra. I would then fix whatever. But life has proved me wrong. Sigh.

We live near to the beach but it is years since my wife has felt safe enough to accompany me on a walk, or to have an ice cream, or relax and enjoy life. sigh.

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Still, I have another saying ... if I'm feeling 'down' ... the only way is up! Hope!

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Hmmm whimsically ... So it's 'up me' today I guess. Hmmm

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It all reminds me of a brilliant, moving, sad, painful, tragic, yet inspiring, wonderful, beautiful film... 'what dreams may come'. If you have never seen it, I recommend that you do. It flows from heaven to hell and back to heaven in the most abstract, poignant, heart rending way. It will make you cry!!! Be warned.

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It stars Robin Williams' one of my favourite actors but so tragic.
 
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*03:19 BS 6.1 but, as I decided to live with this slightly inaccurate sensor it’s probably in the 7s? :confused:

And just now as I cook breakfast, in the oven, scan is 05:17 BS 7.7 & FT BS 8.5. Just doing the occasional spot check on FT unless I feel low or a scan REALLY doesn’t make sense! Which DID happen when I got up to go to the loo in the middle of my sleep when 5.9 to 9.7: FT was a steady BS 7.9 & 8.1; seems like the sudden change of elevation from horizontal to vertical causes the greatest in accuracy? 🙄:rofl:

A Very Good Morning to you all & have a Wonderful Day! 😉

Hang in there @Gwynn A Hug emoji!

Oops! Corrected the right waking time from 06:19 to *03:19: early morning typo before my breakfast! 😳 In case you were scratching your head at me cooking breakfast BEFORE I woke up? 😱:rofl:
 
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Good morning and so sad to read your post Gwynn and really hope that things improve for you as is a very difficult situation and not easily resolved.
A 6.7 for me and today I celebrate 33 years of marriage with our annual greeting “ May the Fourth be with you”.
I had a visit to the biggest ice cream shop in the world yesterday and then our usual Pizza last night so in eating terms a perfect day and somehow managed to keep my TIR about 97% so my diabetes fairy was looking after me.
Nice relaxing w/ end and do hope you enjoy the odd nugget of light even if everything else seems dark around you.
 
@Gwynn she’s got to have the time in the hospital for the doctors etc to do their job and hopefully get her to a point where she can engage with her recovery. By giving her that time and not colluding with her to get her out quickly then you are actually supporting your wife in a very loving way even if she doesn’t see that right now.
 
6.2

Went to Vision Express for a check up and my prescription has changed. No signs of anything detrimental from the diabetes at all.
I was going in knowing that I wanted new glasses anyway as my current pair were very cheap varifocals from Asda and they’ve never been 100% right. The deal they were a part of was £65 for two pairs including the lenses.
I’ve got two pairs coming from Vision Express; both varifocals, one with very fast transition lenses and the other with very dark ones as pure sunglasses. I was expecting them to be maybe a couple of hundred each but I was a tad out.
They costed them all up and I thought I’d chance my arm and ask if there was anything they could do on price.
I’d been in there for about an hour and a half and had been having a laugh with the dispensers etc. I’d also nipped next door and bought them all coffee (only three staff) as their machine had broken down.
I mean we’d been laughing so much as I’d been trying on some of the most bonkers over the top frames they had and the mutual banter game was strong so I didn’t see what harm it could do.
A 40% discount on the total cost of both frames and lenses was a damn fine result I’d say!

Swan Lake this afternoon I think.
 
@ColinUK I absolutely agree. Hard as it may be I have to leave her in the hospital to try to get the best care possible, for as long as is needed.

It is so hard when the last thing she snarled at me was 'you have betrayed me!!!

I don't believe that I did at all, but it is hard knowing that she thinks that.
 
Morning folks. <cheesy grin emoji> 6.4 here. My emojis are AWOL for some reason.

A spot of gardening this morning - one of the rosemary bushes has given up the ghost, so it needs to be dug up to make room for some sun-loving flowers. Then we’re off to a Welsh music fezzie up in the hills. It’s a real treat - looking forward to having my ears blown off by Welsh rock bands, pop music, ukelele groups, choirs...you name it, we’ll be tapping our little Welsh toes to it. Tee hee!
 
@Gwynn She doesn’t think that. It’s the illness that’s making her think that she does.
And as difficult as it is, no matter what the long term outcome is, you know that it can’t be her decision when to leave the care she’s currently getting. That has to be determined by you and the team together.

Worth saying as well that you need to take care of yourself through everything as well. In order to be able to be there for her you first need to be here for yourself.
 
@Bloden Do Welsh toes differ from English ones? Are they actually little dragon claws?!
 
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🙂

Dez
 
Good morning - 5.4

Have a great day everyone.
 
5.4 for me this morning, and that was a late reading, after 8.
 
@Gwynn, @ColinUK 's comments above are absolutely spot on.

When caring for somebody with a chronic mental health condition, the carer becomes the easiest and sometimes the only target for the irrational thoughts of the person being cared for. It is not easy to cope with but you can handle it by not reacting outwardly to the comments at the time but venting elsewhere, just like you are doing on the forum. I go to carers coffee and chats and venting of frustration at the difficulty of caring and interacting with the "system" are major topics in the conversation. You are not alone.

Also, it is a good idea to allow the medics time to get your wife as stable as possible and I would make sure that they appreciate that you want her back at home but are apprehensive about the future and how best you can handle another episode like the last.

Final thought, have you looked at the NICE guidelines on treatment of adult schizophrenia? As usual with Nice guidelines there are lots of long words and are a bit waffly but they might give you some insight into what is going on and what the targets the medics should be working to when they begin to think about her discharge.

My morning readings are hovering around 7 - sometimes 6, sometimes 8 . Must update the dapagliflozin thread now I have been on it several months. I think that there may be some suggestion that the early benefits are slowly disappearing.
 
@Docb Yes I agree.

I am so so gullible. When she rang me twice the other day it was so good. She sounded well and my heart jumped. And I thought, great, they have sorted her out so quickly. But the third call later on was different and I sadly realised that she was playing me. She was saying anything to get out, even lies and deceit. My heart sank but I was then even more determined to not get her home but allow the medics the time they need.

I have had 30 plus years of abuse, blame, accusations, her anger, sadness, all the time trying not to react to it but it makes no odds as her ability to reason and rationalise has deteriotated progressively, and yes I am the target, her enemy, the one she thinks is doing all the nasty stuff to her. If only she knew how much I love her and care for her. But she cannot see or understand that.

So today my heart is very heavy and I am trying to brace myself for what is probably going to happen when eventually she does come home. I feel that she will repack her bags and leave and will cold shoulder me.

I feel like I am in a prison and absolutely alone. No support whatsoever. I did look at Mind, etc but there didn't seem to be anything that could help in my local area. My thinking is getting darker and darker and I am hoping to pull through this but I cannot find any lifeline right now.

Truly an empty place to be right now.

It might be easier if the hospital doctors kept me informed as to her progress. Each day, surely she must improve?

Sorry for the 'rant'
 
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