Morning
4.7, stomach seems to have settled down overnight, but horrible muzzy head that co-codamol didn’t help with, although I know that is not the best medication for headaches but had run out of paracetamol and I am allergic to aspirin and ibuprofen which hubby takes and seemed to be loads of packets of in the medicine cupboard. Can’t really face the stresses of work today after spending most of the weekend in the bathroom, and for some reason it has triggered my mental health and spent a lot of the night churning over things that have happened both at work in the past and both hubby and I losing our fathers 7 weeks apart in 2nd lockdown in 2020, I know neither of us will never be at peace knowing we could not see our fathers when they were in hospital, that we couldn’t see or hug family for comfort or give them the funerals they deserved, but I thought I had at least rationalised it and accepted it, but I think the current stress of work, the part of me that castrophises (sp) dealing with a new IT system that has come with woefully inadequate training for all staff, yet for some reason everyone thinks as admin people my colleague and I should know how everything works, answer all their questions and I am worried will blame us when we can’t or something goes wrong, but as we are bottom of the heirachy it is easy to push it all our way.
Couple that with being let down by my friend over seeing her Boxing Day, hubby is working so I will now be on my own, and more upset that she didn’t offer an apology, just a long text about what she wanted, I can understand she has changed her mind, but surely you should at least apologise or use something like, I hope you don’t mind, or maybe I know you will be disappointed but. Just made me feel no thought for my feelings as long as her own were met.
Sorry for the long woe is me but really tearful and actually no where else to put this as hubby doesn’t understand, he just accepts what happened with our dads as we couldn’t change anything, and as he is not a very sociable person and quite happy to sit at home on his own, doesn’t understand why I am upset with my friend.