Hi all, I think it's about time I got some help!

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Hi Paradox (you're well named incidentally). I feel for your situation because it's complex and seems complicated by psychological drivers too.
However, you've presented us the problems very articulately and also the solutions but then given many reasons why you can't implement them. I'm finding that frustrating and a bit scary for you and your family if I'm honest.
Work isn't an excuse it seems, it's a denial technique. Not taking your medication is no more an option than forgetting to breathe.
Nobody ever had inscribed on their tombstone, 'I wish I'd spent more time at work'. You're entitled to breaks and special adjustments to be made to your working schedule and you need to take them. It doesn't detract from your value or make you a lesser person. It just ensures you stay alive and never again take it out on your son. Something I know you bitterly regret.

Your wife needs to go on a Diabetes Awareness Course. Go together and to hell with the students that day. They'll survive without you but your family might not!

Sorry to sound harsh but your medical problems are mounting and your choices are nil. You need to take your meds and excuses are just excuses. Sorry 😳
 
Hi and welcome.
This group is a lifeline!

Firstly I don't want to patronise but if you go on with those levels and habits then you are not going to be as healthy as you are now for very long, and it sounds like your having a hellish time.

You need to put your diabetes first otherwise there won't be a you. It's that simple.

Before there was insulin people had no treatment and where lucky to live a week.

How I think of it is when you are on a plane and they say your life best/oxygen make first before helping others. Your body first or you will be no use to anyone.

It's all about habits and if you are OCD you are good at habits, so need to be OCD with diabetes. You need to be addicted to your levels and carbs to get them sorted. I'd say you can use that to your advantage.

It sounds to be like you are still in denial and if they have offered you support take it. We don't get enough support now so take all you get offered.

We are all here for you there's no stupid question, and you can do it. It's not the end of your life, it's now easy but it's the hand you have been given.

You've survived 100% every challenge you have faced so this is just another one.

Take each day as you can.

It doesn't need to stop you doing anything, and you do have some control over it even if it feels impossible.
Xx
 
Hey Steff, I have been a good boy, kinda...

I took all morning meds, but did not get chance to eat until 12, I had some graduates in so we went out for a meal (chinese restaurant) and a catch up but in doing this I forgot to check my bloods and medicate first. However, I did do it as soon as I got back into work. so all is well. Just got home now and to be honest am exhausted (only got 2 hours sleep last night) Gonna have me an omelette and hit the sack I think.

Quick question if anyone can answer though...

I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!
 
1st Paradox said:
I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva ExpertIs the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!
Click to expand...
What are your levels? Did you have the Meds when you ate?
My meter is just a result nothing else, so I cantbhel with that. but I carb count myself and use an app to record the details.
 
Amigo said:
Hi Paradox (you're well named incidentally). I feel for your situation because it's complex and seems complicated by psychological drivers too.
However, you've presented us the problems very articulately and also the solutions but then given many reasons why you can't implement them. I'm finding that frustrating and a bit scary for you and your family if I'm honest.
Work isn't an excuse it seems, it's a denial technique. Not taking your medication is no more an option than forgetting to breathe.
Nobody ever had inscribed on their tombstone, 'I wish I'd spent more time at work'. You're entitled to breaks and special adjustments to be made to your working schedule and you need to take them. It doesn't detract from your value or make you a lesser person. It just ensures you stay alive and never again take it out on your son. Something I know you bitterly regret.

Your wife needs to go on a Diabetes Awareness Course. Go together and to hell with the students that day. They'll survive without you but your family might not!

Sorry to sound harsh but your medical problems are mounting and your choices are nil. You need to take your meds and excuses are just excuses. Sorry 😳
Click to expand...

Hi Amigo,

You are totally right, that is one of the reasons I have joined up here and am trying to get as much support as possible, last night's incident has made me realise that I have been a fool and need to get my life back on track. I had an extremely difficult time during my diagnosis with other family matters that caused me to become depressed, this resulted in what I mentioned perviously about subconciously self harming, and I suppose I am just now getting better and trying to sort my life out.

Thank you for the harsh words, they are a good thing to hear and nice that you care so much to actually say them.
 
PhoebeC said:
What are your levels? Did you have the Meds when you ate?
My meter is just a result nothing else, so I cantbhel with that. but I carb count myself and use an app to record the details.
Click to expand...

Hi Phoebe,

Thanks for your kind words, My levels today have been as follows...
01:44am 15.3
03:30am 14.7 (2u)
06:55am 13.3 (1u)
09:37am 15.8 (2u)
---
13:11pm 24.7 (13u)
16:53pm 11.4
 
1st Paradox said:
I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!
Click to expand...

I also used an accucheck Avila Expert for many years, and there is an algorithm in the handset that works it whether you need a correction based on his w long ago your u told it the carbs you were eating or had just eaten. That is why it is important to tell it all the information then it can help you.

The label for post meal on a test is there for people who like to test again say 2 hours after a meal to see if they are then heading in the right direction. By labelling your readings you can review them in bunches. I think that that is for a later date from reading this thread. For now I think you just need to start to looking after yourself by making sure that you inject each time you eat as well as doing the background insulin (Tuejo I think you said).

You already know that your levels are high and have come on here because you want help. As a teacher I was given a week with full pay to attend DAFNE. It was well worth it and having done the course I would have taken leave without pay if necessafor the benefit I got from it. It gave me back the control I wanted and taught me how to adjust doses. It may be worth asking if you could go on DAFNE and once the week is booked it would then be more difficult to call it off.

Look after yourself for your childrens' sake if not for yourself.
 
1st Paradox said:
Hey Steff, I have been a good boy, kinda...

I took all morning meds, but did not get chance to eat until 12, I had some graduates in so we went out for a meal (chinese restaurant) and a catch up but in doing this I forgot to check my bloods and medicate first. However, I did do it as soon as I got back into work. so all is well. Just got home now and to be honest am exhausted (only got 2 hours sleep last night) Gonna have me an omelette and hit the sack I think.

Quick question if anyone can answer though...

I am using the Accu-Chek Aviva Expert and I have noticed that when inputting data is has an option for post meal. So what I am wondering is what this means. Is the reading I just took added onto the post meal data I put in or is it already added? how does it know what bolus to suggest if there is no way to tell it that the meal I had was eaten 2 seconds ago or 2 hours ago? should I just skip the meds? retest later and see what happens?
It just confuses me as to what I should be taking!
Click to expand...
Well it's something I guess but careful Chinese can be lethal for your levels lots of sticky sauces etc . Please try and make it your priority to get back and on the straight and narrow. You get one life make the very best of it x
 
Hello and welcome to the forum. Lots of help and advice to be had here thank goodness. 🙂
 
1st Paradox said:
Hi Phoebe,

Thanks for your kind words, My levels today have been as follows...
01:44am 15.3
03:30am 14.7 (2u)
06:55am 13.3 (1u)
09:37am 15.8 (2u)
---
13:11pm 24.7 (13u)
16:53pm 11.4
Click to expand...
Do you have a team you can call?

If I'm above 12 I do a correction does.
Has that been explained to you?

Results that high really are too high, and 24 is hospital high.

Have you got ketones? You must have at that level. Ketones need actual treatment.

Take care xx
 
Hey Paradox,
I'm glad today has been slightly better for you 🙂
Have you been taught about carb counting and correction doses?
If you really can't get to a DAFNE course (and I really do highly recommend them) maybe schedule an appointment with your DSN to discuss doses again 🙂
 
PhoebeC said:
Do you have a team you can call?

If I'm above 12 I do a correction does.
Has that been explained to you?

Results that high really are too high, and 24 is hospital high.

Have you got ketones? You must have at that level. Ketones need actual treatment.

Take care xx
Click to expand...

Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.

My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.
 
1st Paradox said:
Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.

My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.
Click to expand...
That sounds like an excellent plan, and you've already taken a big step and shown the determination to pull yourself out of the pit 🙂 Even though a course will take time away from your other activities, it will be worth its weight in gold to meet others who have probably been in the same position, facing similar challenges - often this contact is the most valuable aspect of a course, what you learn is a bonus! 🙂

If you want something that may help in the meantime, there is an online carb counting course at:

https://www.bertieonline.org.uk/

There's also a lot of excellent resources available at https://www.t1resources.uk/home/

And finally, it really might be a good idea to just call the Diabetes UK helpline and have a chat:

https://www.diabetes.org.uk/helpline

Let us know how you go on 🙂
 
Makes sense everyone has their own plan.
I'd still speak to them about corrections when your over that 18 though. Numbers like 24 are what people are diagnosed at when they are severely ill.
Do you have ketones all the time?
Please just make your health top priority, it's not worth the risk.
 
1st Paradox said:
Hey, yeah I have been told about corrections and shown what to do... It is worth noting that my Dietitian has set my levels goal to be higher than the expected range due to 2 years of being around 18 mmol average she fears that I may hypo at a higher level. This is confirmed with the odd occasion I have been lower than my average and felt ill at around a 6.

My plan is to go back to the start as it where. I gonna make an appointment to see the specialist, dietitian and gp and tell em all I wish to start over. Re learn what I need to be doing etc, get on those courses and take control of my health for the first time.
Click to expand...

Great that you are planning to make a new start. Use all the help that is available to you fromyour team and keep asking on here.
 
Thanks to you all for the help, support and advice. I am determined to get on track with this thing call Diabetes, I realise now that if my family, friends and students do really mean to me what I say they do then taking care of number 1 is my priority as that will ensure I can put them Sub-first (dont think thats a real term but it should be).

I have just sent mail out to my local clinic to contact me for an appointment asap. Should hear back on Monday fingers crossed.
 
Fingers crossed to. Keep us updated will be great to see you gripping this diabetes around the neck and telling yourself I can do this.
 
Hi Paul and welcome to the forum. I'm so glad you sought help here - tho you may not have realised it at the time - I believe this was your first step to realising & accepting that you have diabetes - I echo the words of advice from the forum members above - you are not alone re: your denial - I too went into denial after being diagnosed and was in denial for 8 - 9 months until I joined this forum. The kind folk here helped me to accept my T2 diabetes - for which I am ever grateful - Paul - there is no limit as to the help - support & advice you will receive here. I wish you well on your diabetes journey
 
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