Terrible terrible jokes!

[silver minion]

Or one of these? Lol

View attachment 36036

Not for me. I don't like fans blowing on my face, my SiL would love it though. I have sent her a screenshot.

 

[silver minion]

As I live in the countryside.....

 

[paultrose]

 

[Alan44]

My wife yelled from upstairs and asked, "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone's got a voodo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"
I replied "No..."
She responded:
"How about now?"

 

[Dartmoor Diabetic]

An elderly guy walks into a pub and sits down next to a pretty girl and says...
So, do I come here often!

 

[silver minion]

I just checked my home insurance policy....
If my blanket gets stolen apparently I'm not covered!

 

[Doughboy]

My wife and I have decided that we don't want kids.
We feel a bit guilty about it - don't know how we will break it to them.

 

[paultrose]

 

[Barrowman]

What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.

Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.

What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.

 

[silver minion]

 

[Barrowman]

Why did they let the Turkey join the Thanksgiving band? Because he had the drumsticks.

What starts with a T, ends with a T and has T in it? A teapot.

 

[silver minion]

For our culture vultures and cat lovers