@EmmaL76 I appreciate you being so open and sharing that, I don't really have "support", those around tend to just get angry, swear and shout because they are frustrated which of course makes me feel even more guilty than I already do for making them so miserable, I too don't enjoy anything anymore and often cry myself to sleep, waking up I feel deflated that I face the same day I have since this all began, the constant hand washing, cleaning, feeling anxious because of others actions etc and I feel I don't know how much longer I can carry on with it, it's exhausting starting all this at 5am each day, I tried CBT online after a doctor referred me but it didn't help in the slightest, the only thing that makes me feel slightly relaxed is to wash until I feel ok, I hate what the pandemic has done to me and what I've become and fear I'll never be "normal" ever again, anyway that's enough of feeling sorry for myself but thanks for listening xx