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Son aged 7 newly diagnosed, I'm so upset

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Hi Cheryl
I'm new here too. My son is 16 and was diagnosed Monday this week. I'm divorced and have no partner, although my ex and I are on very good terms. Like you, I feel very alone. I have cried a lot. I don't want my lovely little man to change. We're having issues with injecting as he has a phobia. I'm doing it for him at the moment. I've already had people telling me I'm wrong to do that, but I'm going with my heart on this one. I'm going to be on the same steep learning curve as you and I am more than happy to do it with you if it will help. If you're anything like me you're feeling completely overwhelmed at the moment.
Much love and hugs x
Well done for doing his injections Cezzer. I have been to a DUK children's event & got put in charge of about 8 teenagers & one had never self injected. Me & the other kids persuaded the kid to inject 😎. Her parents had tried for a long time. Everyone is different. Good luck from someone in his 50th year of sticking pins in ! (ask me if I like injections ?) :D
 
Lou1982 - wow you've been through a lot alongside the diagnosis. I'm in awe of your strength getting through it. I think I'm putting so much pressure on myself to just know it all and get it perfect but I don't want to obsess.

The appointment on Wednesday was brilliant. The nurse we met if 1 of a team of 5. She was lovely, I felt supported by her strength and competence. She has dealt with the school and arranged training first thing Monday morning by her manager. She's keen to get my son into school late Monday morning and quite firm that the school deal with his jabs. I am desperate to do it myself for fear that he'll be upset. She says start how you mean to go on. I think she's right, mum guilt is riding high right now. She spent 2.5 hours with us and my son really liked her. She even chatted to my daughter when she got in from school.

My husband is supporting my son but not me. He really can't deal with me being emotional. His work would have supported him having time off but he insisted on going back to work Thursday because the RAF would crumble without him. (they really, really wouldn't)

Redkite - a appreciate those tips. We've already taken your advise and started to implement healthy (low carb) snacks, just one, between meals and his sister has the same. We have started to have a little bit of dessert now so it satisfies his sweet tooth. If anything, though its extra work its given me a kick up the bum to be more structured and not just let the kids graze through the day.

I still have so many questions and I'm on a emotional roller coaster but my sister has been amazing even though she's 200 miles away. I've found out who my real friends are, the ones who have really stepped up. Especially a lovely married couple, who have even suggested they get trained up on diabetes care so they can have my boy over for playdates/sleepovers to give me a break.

My son has been absolutely amazing. I have really brave normal moments and massive crashing grief like sobbing moments. He already has accepted the blood tests and will happily be pricked by someone else and does the strip himself. He's getting brave with having the insulin in his arms but doesn't like it being done in his legs and hasn't attempted tummy yet.

Can I ask someone who's had this a while, when you go out do you have to do the tests/jabs in private? Can you do them at the table you eat at or the place you go? It feels like breast feeding, some people won't even notice and some might stare and say something.

Cezzer - I'll go through this with you! Wow, both our boys diagnosed on Monday. How are you doing today? They're still our little boys be they 7 or 16. Sometimes I think it must be so much harder for a teenager than a child. My boy is still at the stage where he accepts mummy's rules and trusts me to just guide him. I do feel overwhelmed. I have brief moments where things feel like they always did but suddenly the diagnosis hits me and I cry hard again. Do you have supportive friends to help you through this? I'm struggling with the knowledge of it all, sometimes I'm grateful for the gentle introduction by the nurses with his care but alongside feel frustrated that I don't know absolutely everything. I've never felt as tired as I do right now. Much love n hugs to you too xxx
 
Absolutely no need to hide away to test and inject, we've always done these in public. Most of the time nobody notices, occasionally someone asks a polite, kind question. If anyone ever objected or was rude, I think the tiger Mum in me would show itself 😉

FYI Type 1 Diabetes is a recognised disability under the Disability Discrimination Act and the Equality Act, so you can't be told to leave a restaurant etc for injecting insulin.
 
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Welcome - you'll get loads of support on here..i did .. and you will learn alot..i did. I felt like i was grieving a terrible loss the first week of my wee boys diagnosis. After that I pulled myself together and got on with it..we're five and a half months in and its become a way of life. Cameron is 8 and does all his injections and finger tests himself.. i only carb count work out insulin and keep a close eye on the clock..
It will get better for you.
Its a huge learning curve but help is here on this forum. X
 
Welcome to the forum, your son's diagnosis must be such a shock for you. I don't know if this helps but I was diagnosed when I was 2, nearly 46 years ago. The treatment then was awful in comparison to that of today but I've had a brilliant life. It has been really good and your son will have a great life as well. Take care of yourself. Some dad's do find it incredibly difficult to deal with illness and think if they don't discuss it then it will disappear. Big hugs to all of you.
 
I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard.

We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition.
I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap.







Hi. So, I knew my son wasn't very well and took him to the doctor's first thing Monday. Wee test and blood test then we're in a ambulance to hospital. Quickly diagnosed with type 1 diabetes and we came home last night. Should have the support team visit today. No family history of this.

I just feel devastated. I can't stop crying and I just want to say help, please help.
I don't really know what I'm wanting just feel so alone. I'm married but my husband couldn't care any less about me right now and just ignored me while I sobbed. I'm scared for my son and for myself as selfish as that sounds. I just have no one to talk to right now. Thanks for reading.[/
 
Hi all - what you are all experiencing actually- is GRIEF. It's exactly the same emotions as when someone close dies.

Nobody would expect you to just shrug your shoulders and get on with it if someone close had actually died - so they - and YOU - shouldn't expect to with this! But the same as that kind of grieving process - it fades with time.

Have a look at this book extract
- http://www.businessballs.com/elisabeth_kubler_ross_five_stages_of_grief.htm -

and plot what stage you are at - as you go on. I never saw this till about 2007 and I can still recognise and recall going through every stage when I was diagnosed. It's unconscious, one day you'll suddenly realise you don't seem to have collapsed in tears 'for no reason at all' lately. Gosh - I must be over it! Look forward to getting there - and don't waste time with 'blame' or 'I can't do it' - nobody and no thing is to blame and Oh yes you CAN do it - simply - because you - we! - HAVE to.

Good luck !
 
I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard.

We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition.
I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap.
Hi @Hnorcy, welcome to the forum 🙂 Very sorry to hear about your little one's diagnosis :( It's a very steep learning curve, but things will gradually fall into place. Do have a browse of the resources described in our 'Useful Links' thread:

https://forum.diabetes.org.uk/boards/threads/useful-links-for-people-new-to-diabetes.10406/

Please let us know if you have any questions and we will be more than happy to help 🙂
 
I find myself in a similar situation, my daughter 6 was diagnosed last week and it's all so overwhelming. I am a medical professional ( different field) but I find it all baffling so I hate to imagine how hard it is for a none medic. There is so much info to take on board and you want to get it perfect straight away. It's so hard.

We went to a birthday party today and it was heartbreaking. She is on the 2 injections, I have cut sugars and I am carefully monitoring carbs until I get all the books and advise I need to manage this awful condition.
I have just read about pumps and automatic glucose testing. I will be enquiring about this with my nurse asap.

Oh my goodness @Hnorcy I'm surprised your daughter's been started on twice daily injections. My son was started on that back in 2005 and it was out of date even then. It's really impossible to get any kind of control with twice daily insulin in a growing child, let alone being able to manage parties and childhood bugs. Most children these days are on multiple daily injections (MDI) or an insulin pump straight from diagnosis. I recommend getting yourself the Ragnar Hanas book and finding out as much as you can about the different insulin regimens, then go back to your clinic team and ask for a more flexible approach. Just as an example, she could have the same party food as all the other kids if she was on a pump or MDI, you'd just give rapid acting insulin for whatever carbs she was having. Twice daily is dreadful - all the big class parties my son went to were always mid afternoon, so party food served at 4, too late for lunch, too early for tea, completely unworkable on such a rigid regime.
 
Thank you @Redkite I had come to that conclusion myself after reading up a little. I think the nurse was trying to give her time to get used to it all and she said she would introduce us to carb counting and MDI when we come back from a skiing holiday (we already had booked before diagnosis) I feel so stressed out by it all. First day back at dance tonight and 2 hypos
 
It's a steep learning curve but you'll get there, it's really early days still. On twice daily insulin your only option for trying to prevent exercise-hypos is to give a sugary snack before the exercise, but it's trial and error how much to give.
 
I had given her a small snack, but obviously not enough. Will the school do her injections?
 
I had given her a small snack, but obviously not enough. Will the school do her injections?

The school must ensure that she is fully supported with her diabetes care and can access all areas of the curriculum. Therefore legally they must provide a member of staff (preferably more than one) to do insulin injections. Individual staff cannot be compelled to give injections, but if none are willing to volunteer, the school has a duty to employ someone with this duty in their contract. It is not acceptable to require parents to come into school to do this (a big improvement on the old days!). You and your DSN need to meet with the school, to draw up a care plan for your daughter and for the DSN to train staff. If she's on twice daily when she starts back at school, make sure the school knows that this is only temporary and she will eventually be needing a lunchtime injection.
 
She went back on Monday, the school has been very good so far. I was wondering if that was why they did 2 injections to avoid the school having to do it.
I'm due to go back to work next week but I can't decide if I'm ready. I have a stressful job where I need to support other people and I'm not feeling very stable at the minute. Part of me thinks it would be better to get back to normal routine. My daughter is getting very used to me being around. Did you take time off work ?
 
She went back on Monday, the school has been very good so far. I was wondering if that was why they did 2 injections to avoid the school having to do it.
I'm due to go back to work next week but I can't decide if I'm ready. I have a stressful job where I need to support other people and I'm not feeling very stable at the minute. Part of me thinks it would be better to get back to normal routine. My daughter is getting very used to me being around. Did you take time off work ?

It was different for me because he was 4 at diagnosis and I hadn't returned to work yet since he was born (was hoping for another baby but wasn't to be). So he started reception newly diagnosed and in those days (2005) the equality law was weaker and it was pot luck whether a school would be supportive or not - I had to go in every day and do his tests and injections, so took a job as a midday supervisor throughout his primary school. In your case, it depends how you feel the school is coping and how settled your daughter is. Are you contactable by phone while at work?
 
No not at work. I think I'll speak to my go tomorrow
 
Hnorcy I have been T1 for more than 50yrs & never been unemployed in my life quite often 6 &7 days a week. Good luck ps still full time employed.🙂
 
Hi Cheryl. Welcome to the forum. Sending you lots of support and (((hugs))).
 
Hi how are you getting on now ?
Hope you coping
Oh that's great you have good support at school is he still getting on ok with it at school ?
My daughter was diagnosed 4 weeks ago (shes 13 ) and I still keep getting upset over it and stressed
I have a partner but we don't get on, so hes no comfort and he just wants to moan about silly things when all I care about at the moment is my daughter !
Its pretty lonely at first isn't it I feel like that an am trying to find some diabetic friends for myself and my daughter but its proving no so easy
 
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