Diabetes Support Forum 10th Anniversary Advent Calendar!

[Northerner]

Day 13, from 2012 - how about some tasty 'Enterex' chocolate? Mmmmmm!!!

 

[robert@fm]

Sounds like a laxative and probably works as one. 😱

 

[Madeline]

Could someone explain the porcupine/hedgehog thing please 🙂

 

[Northerner]

Could someone explain the porcupine/hedgehog thing please 🙂

It's from back in 'olden times' before lancets had been invented 😱 Well, before blood test strips too, actually! 😱 It's remarkable how far things have come...

I won’t forget those wise old words my Daddy said to me
As he sat down in his chair one night and perched me on his knee.
He said, ‘Son, diabetes wasn’t always so much fun,
So let me tell you how it was in 1931!’

Twice a day we’d drive to town, down to the abattoir,
Pick out a bovine pancreas and stow it in the car,
And when we got home Mum and Dad would mash that organ up,
And strain it through a muslin bag into a paper cup…

Then Dad would get some chemicals and boil them in a pan,
Adding bits of this and that with flourish and élan!
And meanwhile I would drink and drink until I had to pee,
And Mum would take a jar away, as swiftly as could be!

She’d add it to the chemicals, and if it turned bright red
Then I would have no supper and be sent off straight to bed.
But if it just turned yellowish, I’d have something to eat
Like carrots mashed in gravy, with sweet pickles for a treat!

I didn’t like the needles though, at least six inches long!
So Mum would jig around the room, distracting me with song!
And when he’d scraped the rust off, Dad would stick it in my butt,
I’d bite down on a leather strap to keep my mouth tight shut!

So, should you whinge and moan about how finger pricking’s bad,
Then pause to contemplate about the progress we have had.
We’ve gone from times when prospects for our future might seem poor,
To looking forward to the day that they announce the cure!

😱

 

[Northerner]

Day 14 - Bet you didn't know that bread could get diabetes 😱

Reminds me of another poem...

Low G.I. bread

Down at the bakers, I’ve heard it’s been said,
There’s a good special offer on Low GI bread.
So I put on my coat and set off down the road
For something to lower my glycaemic load.

And there in the window in prominent view
Was a sign confirming what I’d been told was true:
‘Live your life healthy, for you’re a long time dead –
Come in and sample our Low GI bread!’

The devil inside me said ‘I wonder if they know?
They say ‘Low GI’, but what makes it so?’
So I questioned the counter girl, would she comply?
She looked rather puzzled, then gave this reply…

‘Well, the ‘Low’ means there’s less, and the ‘I’ means ‘Inside’,
But as for the ‘G’ I can’t really decide…
Could it be Garlic or Ginger or Goat?
Or (scraping the barrel!) a Gloucestershire stoat?’

‘Or Gherkins or Grapefruit, or maybe Goosefat?’
I suggested ‘Glycaemic?’ – ‘No, I don’t think it’s that –
Gammon? Or Gumbo? Or Guava? Or Gin?’
(She was beginning to wish that I hadn’t come in!)

Then a lady beside me said ‘Why would I pay more
For bread that has less of what went in before?’
That caused the girl’s listing of ‘G’ things to stop,
So we both turned round briskly and vacated the shop! 😱

 

[Eddy Edson]

It's from back in 'olden times' before lancets had been invented 😱 Well, before blood test strips too, actually! 😱 It's remarkable how far things have come...

I won’t forget those wise old words my Daddy said to me
As he sat down in his chair one night and perched me on his knee.
He said, ‘Son, diabetes wasn’t always so much fun,
So let me tell you how it was in 1931!’

Twice a day we’d drive to town, down to the abattoir,
Pick out a bovine pancreas and stow it in the car,
And when we got home Mum and Dad would mash that organ up,
And strain it through a muslin bag into a paper cup…

Then Dad would get some chemicals and boil them in a pan,
Adding bits of this and that with flourish and élan!
And meanwhile I would drink and drink until I had to pee,
And Mum would take a jar away, as swiftly as could be!

She’d add it to the chemicals, and if it turned bright red
Then I would have no supper and be sent off straight to bed.
But if it just turned yellowish, I’d have something to eat
Like carrots mashed in gravy, with sweet pickles for a treat!

I didn’t like the needles though, at least six inches long!
So Mum would jig around the room, distracting me with song!
And when he’d scraped the rust off, Dad would stick it in my butt,
I’d bite down on a leather strap to keep my mouth tight shut!

So, should you whinge and moan about how finger pricking’s bad,
Then pause to contemplate about the progress we have had.
We’ve gone from times when prospects for our future might seem poor,
To looking forward to the day that they announce the cure!

😱

Car? Luxury!

 

[Madeline]

Car? Luxury!

Don’t be silly, cow pulling a cart.

 

[Eddy Edson]

Don’t be silly, cow pulling a cart.

Cow? Luxury!

 

[Madeline]

Cow? Luxury!

Maybe Northerner’s Dad?

 

[Eddy Edson]

Maybe Northerner’s Dad?

His old ma, more likely. His dad would have been out in the fields with the Porcupine Beagle.

 

[Madeline]

His old ma, more likely. His dad would have been out in the fields with the Porcupine Beagle.

 

[trophywench]

His old ma, more likely. His dad would have been out in the fields with the Porcupine Beagle.

Don't be daft - everyone knows you have to use Pointers - can't use beagles or spaniels - even trained Springers or any type of retriever - cos their mouths are too soft for the job, hence why they're so excellent at picking up any sort of bird or pesky wabbit you have just bagged.

 

[Eddy Edson]

Don't be daft - everyone knows you have to use Pointers - can't use beagles or spaniels - even trained Springers or any type of retriever - cos their mouths are too soft for the job, hence why they're so excellent at picking up any sort of bird or pesky wabbit you have just bagged.

No, no - you miss the point. The Porcupine Beagle is trained to approach its target with extreme stealth & startle it with a torrent of yelps. The porcupine of course reacts by shedding spines which may then be collected at leisure.

 

[trophywench]

Ah, well of course never having lived anywhere were the porcupine also did, I purely based my knowledge on the Worcestershire tribe of hedgehogs and the shotgun/dog owners I knew up to the later 70s when test strips became available on prescription.

 

[Northerner]

Day 15 - Misconstrued! 😱

 

[Northerner]

Day 16, from 2016 - on everyone's Christmas table this year, a tin of traditional festive Spam... 🙂 What's your favourite way of presenting it?

 

[Lanny]

Day 16, from 2016 - on everyone's Christmas table this year, a tin of traditional festive Spam... 🙂 What's your favourite way of presenting it?

I hate Spam as it's so salty! I prefer Chinese tinned luncheon meat & the best is the Ma Ling brand that I can get from Tesco. It has so much more flavour than just plain salty!

Edited to add:-* Oh, just noticed it's made in Holland but, that's par for the course for a lot of Chinese products here in the UK: there's a huge Chinese community & manufacturing plants in Holland! Ma Ling in Hong Kong is made in China.

 

[Northerner]

View attachment 10567

I hate Spam as it's so salty! I prefer Chinese tinned luncheon meat & the best is the Ma Ling brand that I can get from Tesco. It has so much more flavour than just plain salty!

Edited to add:-* Oh, just noticed it's made in Holland but, that's par for the course for a lot of Chinese products here in the UK: there's a huge Chinese community & manufacturing plants in Holland! Ma Ling in Hong Kong is made in China.

I love the 'serving suggestion' - cut a couple of slices off the slab, stick a bit of salad in between. Very sophisticated! 😱 😉

 

[Stitch147]

Day 16, from 2016 - on everyone's Christmas table this year, a tin of traditional festive Spam... 🙂 What's your favourite way of presenting it?

I always remember Spam fritters when I was at school. Used to be one of my favourites.

 

[Ljc]

Day 16, from 2016 - on everyone's Christmas table this year, a tin of traditional festive Spam... 🙂 What's your favourite way of presenting it?

Battered and fried