Depression

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I have been diabetic since I was 11. At roughly the age of 12 I started, very suddenly, suffering the symptoms of depression but kept them very private for a very long time (I have only realised this since re-reading diaries I kept at that age). After going through school, college, uni and a post-grad course with severe bouts of depression, manifesting themselves in eating disorders and self harm, I finally realised that what i was feeling wasn't normal and was most likely rooted in my diabetes. I went to clinics with very out of control blood sugar readings but always protested that everything was fine. It wasn't. I finally discussed this with my doctor who referred me to a psychiatrist who told me I didn't need pills to combat it and was then referred onto a psychotherapist who I have been seeing for the past couple of months. I finally feel that I am getting somewhere but I find it difficult to believe that my 'it's fine' routine was really all that convincing, especially with the erraticness of my blood sugars! It was only really due to me finally getting to the point where I couldn't deal with it any more that help was offered. I feel very strongly that this should be offered at the time of diagnosis, or should be readily available at any point in your treatment, by hospital diabetic teams. If I had had help dealing with the feelings I had at the time I would like to think I could have enjoyed my teenage years an awful lot more!
 
I definitely have what would be called bad patches. Definitely shite times those for myself and those around me. They have to put up and irritable, grumpy bastard moping around the place and being on a bit of a short fuse. Last time I felt down was November sort of time.
Although I do have down times I wouldn't know if they were depression or not. Just another nail in the coffin of my all to short existence I'd say.
All I need to do is avoid listening to god awful Coldplay. My bad patches seem to coincide with listening to that.

Tom H
 
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I think anyone with diabetes will get depressed now and again and i think there should be more people to help with it. but no1 realises how hard it is until u actually have it urself.

sometimes wen im takin insulin i just burst out cryin, thinkin y me?
but then 2 mins later im fine and its forgotten about, i think its kinda normal just to cry and be upset about it now and again but that mite just be me lol
 
litto-miss-loz said:
sometimes wen im takin insulin i just burst out cryin, thinkin y me?
but then 2 mins later im fine and its forgotten about, i think its kinda normal just to cry and be upset about it now and again but that mite just be me lol
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I definitely know what you mean there. Sometimes I do just go onto the "why me?" train of thought. It lasts for about two or three minutes and then I just shut up and get on with life.

Tom H
 
Hi Carolyn
Some days can be really tough and any tips offered can seem very superficial, but for me, keeping busy, getting exercise, swimming, walking etc help me cope. Also keeping a diary of the good things - even on a bad day, there is normally something worthwhile to record. And smiling, sounds silly but it does seem to help! I also recommend the book 'How to lift depression ...Fast'.
 
I think Alex is suffering from depression a bit- even though he is only 10. I have asked his DN and she has referred us as a family to a mental health unit. Hopefully he will be able to talk about how he feels in depth- i cant imagine what it must feel like - but i think all of you on this forum are wonderful the way you cope with everything - you all seem to be very positive about it and make me and Alex feel that although diabetes can be daunting - it is something that can be managed and you can still just get on with your life plans etc..Bev and Alex. x
 
bev said:
I think Alex is suffering from depression a bit- even though he is only 10. I have asked his DN and she has referred us as a family to a mental health unit. Hopefully he will be able to talk about how he feels in depth- i cant imagine what it must feel like - but i think all of you on this forum are wonderful the way you cope with everything - you all seem to be very positive about it and make me and Alex feel that although diabetes can be daunting - it is something that can be managed and you can still just get on with your life plans etc..Bev and Alex. x
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Hi bev, it must be a lot for a 10 year old to take in - I'm lucky in that I was nearly 5 times his age before I developed this. One thing to remember though, is that everyone has times when they are feeling down - diabetic or otherwise - so he needs to be aware that not everything can be attributed to his diabetes. I know it must be difficult, but you need to avoid being an 'enabler' and make sure he has a sense of perspective of things. Goodness - I hope that doesn't sound too 'heavy' or a criticism!

I've been bipolar for most of my adult life, and have come to recognise those episodes that are due to 'normal' malaise and those that are due to my warped brain chemicals:(

I do hope he's feeling more upbeat soon! You've conveyed a great sense of his character in your posts here, I don't think I would be alone in saying how proud we are of him, and how well he is doing! 🙂
 
Oh my goodness thankyou northerner!
You have 'hit the nail on the head' so to speak! I have been wondering how much of his feeling down is related to diabetes and how much is just age related? I think teenage hormones are kicking in and i know i was being over protective/smothering (this has changed now due mainly to all the lovely people on here giving advice!) and your right, i think i was being an 'enabler' and blaming everything on diabetes (unwittingly) but i now try to steer the blaming game away from diabetes for the reason youve stated! Its difficult trying to seperate the two but i know its in his best interests if we do. He does have some 'bad feelings'about diabetes which we are hoping he will express to the mental health nurse in private. Once again invaluable advice greatfully received! And thank you for the praise - i will make sure he knows what you said. Thanks. Bev
 
Bev, I agree with Northerner - Alex is a child first and foremost, diabetes after. Sure, diabetes does cause problems that people without diabetes don't have, and depression is known to be associated with diabetes (not attributing which causes which). But it's always better to concentrate on what you want to achieve rather than what you are prohibited from doing. If he loves karate, football, cycling, hiking, dinosaurs, minibeasts, chemical explosions, maps, art, reading, acting, dancing, whatever etc, then that's what's important - and there could be quite a few things!
And the same applies to you - hope you have some fun things in your life, too.
 
I agree with "why me" was very depressed last yr .. having had diabetes for 2 yrs i'm 35 yrs old now. I felt i couldnt do anymore testing, injections writing everything down.. i just couldnt cope with life and doing this at the same time. Had to go on medication put came off it a yr later. Feeling better but still have episodes but not as dark as before. A bit depressed at the moment as my g.p wont give me the strips and he doesnt seem to understand type 1 at all! i feel i'm fighting my corner all the time and only get support from diabetic specialist nurse..
 
chezpez said:
I agree with "why me" was very depressed last yr .. having had diabetes for 2 yrs i'm 35 yrs old now. I felt i couldnt do anymore testing, injections writing everything down.. i just couldnt cope with life and doing this at the same time. Had to go on medication put came off it a yr later. Feeling better but still have episodes but not as dark as before. A bit depressed at the moment as my g.p wont give me the strips and he doesnt seem to understand type 1 at all! i feel i'm fighting my corner all the time and only get support from diabetic specialist nurse..
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really sorry to hear that. Have you thought about changing your gp? I know that may be a bit daunting especially as you are not feeling great, but i may be worth it. Also, you are type 1 and need to test at the very least 4 times a day and more if you are driving (dvla requirement) and if you exercise, feel unwell. Put this to him and he should not refuse you your requirements. if he still refuses cant you get your dsn to speak/write to him, this should not ber allowed. 😡
 
Gosh, so much to say here. I guess all I can add is that a chronic condition brings with it the necessity for incredible fortitude and optimism -- and who feels like that all the time? No one.

It seems to me to be completely inevitable that having diabetes means that there are times when depression is not far away. I just can't imagine otherwise. This doesn't mean that depression itself is inevitable -- but I think it does mean that the battle needs fighting sometimes. And sometimes it creeps in, and sometimes it doesn't.

As several people have said, saving graces can be perspective and exercise. The problem is, when you're really down, you don't feel like engaging in either.

And so we come to support: so many on here speak of incompetent or at best erratic support. Surely getting this right is one of the most important things? But like many of you, we have found the provision to be sketchy, though very good-willed.

If it's at all interesting, at the JDRF conference in mid-April there was quite a lot of talk about the psychological and sociological impacts of in this case type 1. There was a really strong acknowledgment of how important dealing with the whole picture is. More money is being put into this. Maybe just maybe more help will start to make its way through...
 
amen for this thread. as you prob know im a pretty rubbish diabetic, had 6 monthly check up and was on the verge of telling them everythings fine but i grabbed the bull by the horns (or whatever the saying is) and told them how much i wish i didnt have diabetes, that if i ignore it, itll go away, i then went on to tell them how close i was to ketoacidosis (my sugars were 31.3 at the time).

she then mentioned that Chelsmford (my home town) has literally just set up a new diabetic counselling service and i was the first person they referred to it. got letter this morning and i have an session booked in the next two weeks. The dsn said it might work, it might not, but at least im giving it a go...

im sure i speak for a lot of people who get down in the dumps and ask "why me", we're all human after all!! will keep u posted on what its like, but if it gets offered to you, take it!!! the counselling that is

😱)
 
hellbell84 said:
amen for this thread. as you prob know im a pretty rubbish diabetic, had 6 monthly check up and was on the verge of telling them everythings fine but i grabbed the bull by the horns (or whatever the saying is) and told them how much i wish i didnt have diabetes, that if i ignore it, itll go away, i then went on to tell them how close i was to ketoacidosis (my sugars were 31.3 at the time).

she then mentioned that Chelsmford (my home town) has literally just set up a new diabetic counselling service and i was the first person they referred to it. got letter this morning and i have an session booked in the next two weeks. The dsn said it might work, it might not, but at least im giving it a go...

im sure i speak for a lot of people who get down in the dumps and ask "why me", we're all human after all!! will keep u posted on what its like, but if it gets offered to you, take it!!! the counselling that is

😱)
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really hope it goes well for you,and that you are feeling more positive soon. 🙂
 
I have only been diagnosed in december so it is very new to me but i feel very down too at the moment and have done so since diagnosis. i am returning to work next week on phase return and i am very scared at how my work load is going to affect my diabetes. people say oh you will be ok and tell you not to worry but unless they have the condition they cannot possibly know what it is like to feel afraid. i hope you start to feel better soon. i was referred to a psycologist but cancelled the apppointent because the dsn said the clinical psycologist thought it was too soon really but offered to see me anyway but then i felt i was being too soft that is why i cancelled it. does anyone else feel that they have felt like they were just over reacting?
 
i've been diabetic for over 9 years now and still get my down days. i do think diabetes and depresion go hand in hand (so does my dsn) which is a pain as we have to deal with a lot already, but i found when i went through my rebeling period that there was help out there i just didnt want it. i was stuborn and hoped that if i ignored my diabetes it would go away. well it didnt and i ended up really sick. it took my partner to tell me if i didnt book my ideas up and look after myself i wouldnt get to see my kids grow up. it was the wake up call i needed. now i have a very active life i run and do lots of other sports and still have a social life, but dont drink half as much as my mates do lol. well thats sort of a little about me.
 
Patricia said:
Gosh, so much to say here. I guess all I can add is that a chronic condition brings with it the necessity for incredible fortitude and optimism -- and who feels like that all the time? No one.

It seems to me to be completely inevitable that having diabetes means that there are times when depression is not far away. I just can't imagine otherwise. This doesn't mean that depression itself is inevitable -- but I think it does mean that the battle needs fighting sometimes. And sometimes it creeps in, and sometimes it doesn't.

As several people have said, saving graces can be perspective and exercise. The problem is, when you're really down, you don't feel like engaging in either.

And so we come to support: so many on here speak of incompetent or at best erratic support. Surely getting this right is one of the most important things? But like many of you, we have found the provision to be sketchy, though very good-willed.

If it's at all interesting, at the JDRF conference in mid-April there was quite a lot of talk about the psychological and sociological impacts of in this case type 1. There was a really strong acknowledgment of how important dealing with the whole picture is. More money is being put into this. Maybe just maybe more help will start to make its way through...
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Yesterday morning, my sister was found dead in bed. She had been a Diabetic for ten years plus, and took insulin 4 times a day. The reason I mention this, is not to call upon sympathy, but to explain my sister. First there was years of denial, then, 'OK' 'so I have Diabetes...so what!'. What she ended up with, is near blindness, and an inability to walk. This, compounded with her condition, caused bouts of Depression. I highlighted the bit about more money being put into Diabetes, in Patricia's post. Having just been to see my Doctor, armed with a thousand questions, and having a 10 minute slot...his pat answer was 'wait until you see the nurse, she's good. She'll answer all you questions'.

More money...yes, and more time, more resources etc. There should be specialist diabetes centers, where you can get support and practical advice, like diets, exercise etc. Where you don't wait six months to have your eyes tested, or your feet looked at........😡


OK rant over..........just, that I agree, more money. We don't appreciate the gravity of the Disease, until it throws it's evil cloak over our shoulders.
 
dave so sorry to hear about this xx
I had a friend who got diagnosed he was 30 he did'nt listen to any docs or anything what so ever carried on drinking smoking eating all the wrong things and when he had a bad foor back in september he went to hospital thinking it was gout he has to have his foot off in the end he died through kidnes failure I was gutted but it sure did learn me when i was diagnosed to take it seriously
 
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