Hi Barbara, and welcome (and thanks Mike for the message)
🙂
As Mike says, I have a lot of food intolerances too, and although I'm not fully vegetarian I don't eat meat, so I know how difficult it must be for you. It's easier to list things I can eat than to list ones I can't, so if you are the same, do give us a list, as others have suggested, and we'll tell you which of the things on it will help lower your HbA1c and which are best avoided, though it does vary from person to person, so if you're not already testing your blood sugar regularly, getting yourself a testing kit is good advice.
My Mum has diverticulitis and I know the standard advice for that is to avoid nuts and seeds, but to experiment a bit with other things like seedless fruit and veg to see which you can tolerate (presumably not many in your case). I'm trying to think which things Mum and I can both eat, which wouldn't be too bad for a type 2 - carrots spring to mind, and also cheese and yogurt, very plain savoury biscuits like Ryvita if you can find gluten-free ones, small amounts of potato (boiled ones are best, they're lower in starch). But if you can eat dairy I'd eat as much as you can of that and fill up on fat so that you can cut carbs as much as possible. You won't gain weight or raise your cholesterol eating fat if you can reduce your carbs a lot at the same time, and your HbA1c will go down.
I shouldn't bother with the Carbs & Cals book though, tbh, because if you're anything like me, most of the meals in it aren't going to be things you can eat. I had a look at it in the hospital and I was turning the pages saying "no, can't eat that ... can't eat that ... can't eat that ... ". I find it easier to check the carbs in individual things I know I can eat rather than looking at whole meals I can't - you can do that using this website:
http://www.calorieking.com/foods/ - just put in anything you eat and you can adjust the portion size in the results and then scroll down to see how many carbs it has in it.
I have controlled IBS - I came off my meds and manage it with diet, and it no longer effects me. Eating oats is supposed to help with that, and I think it's one of the things which helps me, as I have them for breakfast every day now - but not every diabetic can tolerate them without an increase in blood sugar, so you really need to test 2 hours after eating them to see what effect they have on you personally. The other thing which really helps me is liquorice - I eat a small piece (only a couple of grams of carbs) every day, and I drink peppermint and liquorice tea (I found peppermint on its own didn't work for me).
I have the same problem with specialists contradicting each other - the good ones are the ones who take on board what works for you and fit their advice in around your combination of conditions rather than expecting you to fit into their boxes. Don't let anyone tell you that you must eat things which you know you can't tolerate - we've found on this forum that if people eat foods to which they're sensitive, those foods raise their blood sugar more than any amount of carbs! For instance, I have a slight intolerance to eggs. Eggs are carb-free so I shouldn't have to inject any insulin for them - but actually I need so much insulin for them it's not worth my trying to eat them - no matter how much I inject I end up with readings in the high teens - they're worse for my blood sugar than a meal of pasta, scones, and jam would be! So to lower your HbA1c, stick to foods you know you can tolerate.
If you're not already seeing a Diabetes Specialist Nurse regularly (ie at the hospital, not a surgery nurse), it might be worth asking your GP to refer you to one - I've found they are the most understanding of the people I've seen, as they tend to have a good idea of what living with diabetes is like in practice and to be much more adaptable in terms of the advice they give. Sorry if you are unlucky enough to have an unhelpful one!
It can be especially difficult when you have other conditions and intolerances that mean you can't just follow what might be a good diet for your diabetes control. It might be helpful for the people here if you could give an idea of the kinds of meals you are eating. Are you testing before and one or two hours after eating to determine how well your body can tolerate your meal choices? Have a read of 
