Hello Rob,
I don't have personal experience but one of my closet friends lost both limbs a number of years ago and I know how difficult that was for her.
I appreciate what you say about counselling. It has to be the right type of counselling, if it has any chance of succeeding. I am wondering if a specialist organisation, such as the Amputee Foundation UK, may be of any help? There are also a number of organisations that work with veterans who have lost limbs. The cause may be different but the impact of trying to put your life back together would be something they would have worked with many times. These organisations can sometimes act as advocates with various agencies, to ensure you are getting the right benefits and entitlements, such as the Blue badge. I can't guarantee anything and you may have already tried this avenue but I am just putting it out there as another option that might be worth exploring, as well as the helpline? I am angry that you didn't get the help you deserved because although we can't always control what happens to us, good rehab and support can make a world of difference.
http://amputationfoundation.org/