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Anyone else on here had an amputation?

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.
Rob187

Rob187

Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Type 1
I’m only 38 and lost my leg a couple of years ago. Finding getting on with my life impossible, and I don’t care about anything anymore. Has anyone else gone through this who can offer any advice?
I’m resentful of everything and struggling to see any positives at this point, especially concerning ever having a relationship again.
 
sorry just couldnt read your post and not reply.

i havent had an amputation but have cared for people who have. have you had any support with this like counseling (cbt). also ask your g.p if there is a local support group that can help.

Please dont suffer alone or in silence. hopefully your not as you have posted on here which is a huge step in the right direction. we are all helpful on this forum if you need to talk and chat. You will move on in time, concentrate on yourself first not a relationship, love may just come when you least expect it.
 
Hi, if I’m honest I found the counselling utterly useless. We had a circular conversation about how I would be depressed because I’d been through a traumatic event-I didn’t need a counsellor to tell me that. I needed help on getting on with my life which I didn’t get.
I keep asking to speak to someone who’s had an amputation through the Disablement Services Centre where I had my Physio.
In 3 years can you guess how many people that is? Yup 0.
On top of that the DWP has made me pay back £2000 because of benefits I claimed “illegally” when I lost my leg! I can’t even get a blue badge. Everybody mentions support groups etc I don’t know where your from but these don’t exist near me as far as I’m aware.
 
Hi Rob. Good to hear from you again 🙂 but sorry to hear how you're struggling. :( I can't offer any advice on the amputation but agree with Flower that the helpline can assist. Just sending best wishes and hope things start to improve for you soon. 🙂
 
Thanks Matt, I hope they can. Everyone says they can but when push comes to shove they rarely do and just refer me somewhere else.
I’ll ring the number on the link Flower shared tomorrow (it closes at 6), but I’m not optimistic if I’m honest. I do appreciate the response though Matt.
 
Hello Rob,

I don't have personal experience but one of my closet friends lost both limbs a number of years ago and I know how difficult that was for her.

I appreciate what you say about counselling. It has to be the right type of counselling, if it has any chance of succeeding. I am wondering if a specialist organisation, such as the Amputee Foundation UK, may be of any help? There are also a number of organisations that work with veterans who have lost limbs. The cause may be different but the impact of trying to put your life back together would be something they would have worked with many times. These organisations can sometimes act as advocates with various agencies, to ensure you are getting the right benefits and entitlements, such as the Blue badge. I can't guarantee anything and you may have already tried this avenue but I am just putting it out there as another option that might be worth exploring, as well as the helpline? I am angry that you didn't get the help you deserved because although we can't always control what happens to us, good rehab and support can make a world of difference.

http://amputationfoundation.org/
 
Hi Rob, I haven’t had your experience and wouldn’t suggest I have any idea how you must feel. There are different kinds of counsellors, sounds like you have had the short straw so far, I’m sorry you had to go through that. What you need is someone to help you grieve for what you have lost, not just the physical but all the life changes that your amputation has brought about. It’s no surprise it’s hit you hard, your whole sense of identity has been turned upside down and inside out. I really hope you get the support you deserve x
 
Ruby/London said:
Hello Rob,

I don't have personal experience but one of my closet friends lost both limbs a number of years ago and I know how difficult that was for her.

I appreciate what you say about counselling. It has to be the right type of counselling, if it has any chance of succeeding. I am wondering if a specialist organisation, such as the Amputee Foundation UK, may be of any help? There are also a number of organisations that work with veterans who have lost limbs. The cause may be different but the impact of trying to put your life back together would be something they would have worked with many times. These organisations can sometimes act as advocates with various agencies, to ensure you are getting the right benefits and entitlements, such as the Blue badge. I can't guarantee anything and you may have already tried this avenue but I am just putting it out there as another option that might be worth exploring, as well as the helpline? I am angry that you didn't get the help you deserved because although we can't always control what happens to us, good rehab and support can make a world of difference.

http://amputationfoundation.org/
Click to expand...
Thanks Ruby, I’ll definately give this a try as well as the helpline. It’s a start at least.
 
CathyB said:
Hi Rob, I haven’t had your experience and wouldn’t suggest I have any idea how you must feel. There are different kinds of counsellors, sounds like you have had the short straw so far, I’m sorry you had to go through that. What you need is someone to help you grieve for what you have lost, not just the physical but all the life changes that your amputation has brought about. It’s no surprise it’s hit you hard, your whole sense of identity has been turned upside down and inside out. I really hope you get the support you deserve x
Click to expand...
Thanks Cathy, I appreciate the thought. I’ve got some options from the other members now so at least I might be able to move forward.
 
Hi Rob, I'm sorry to hear about everything you're going through. It sounds as thought you're really having a tough time with everything. Just wanted to reiterate the points above that the Diabetes UK helpline would be a really good place to start and that we're all here on the forum whenever you need to vent.

Hopefully something positive can come from a chat today with one of our helpline staff.
 
Emma Diabetes UK said:
Hi Rob, I'm sorry to hear about everything you're going through. It sounds as thought you're really having a tough time with everything. Just wanted to reiterate the points above that the Diabetes UK helpline would be a really good place to start and that we're all here on the forum whenever you need to vent.

Hopefully something positive can come from a chat today with one of our helpline staff.
Click to expand...
Hi Emma, I work FT the only time I could call this number is on my dinner around lots of my colleagues or strangers in the city centre. I’m going to have to wait until my summer holidays before I can speak to someone by the looks of it.
 
Rob187 said:
Hi Emma, I work FT the only time I could call this number is on my dinner around lots of my colleagues or strangers in the city centre. I’m going to have to wait until my summer holidays before I can speak to someone by the looks of it.
Click to expand...
Hi Rob sorry to learn about your situation. Is there any way you can make the call sooner? You sound as though you could deal with some help now. Are you able to ask for time off & leave early/go in late one day? Employers should provide you with reasonable request for medical appointments. I don’t like to think of you struggling
 
HI Rob, I'm sorry to hear that you are going through such a hard time. I haven't had an amputation and I can't imagine what you are going through however I have had my own struggles and have seen a number of people. Personally I didn't feel that a counsellor was very helpful however I have just been referred by my diabetes consultant to a health psychologist. Their role is to help you to come to terms with the complications caused by long term illnesses and I think that this may be of use to you. I know that in order to be referred it needs to come from a consultant rather than your GP, are you still under the hospital? Perhaps it is worth discussing with your consultant when you next have an appointment.
 
Hi Emma, I didn’t know they were a thing to be honest. I’ll be able to get a consultants referral assuming they do that in my nhs area. I hope so. I’m just getting passed around again.
Diabetes helpline gave me a number for an amputees charity- they run groups in Scotland and Leeds. I’m in Newcastle for Christ’s sake!! Absolutely useless.
I’ll ring the hospital about this health psychologist and see what they can do. Thanks for the info
 
Mate, that's a c**p hand you've been dealt and I wish you all the luck in the World getting some kinda happiness in the future. Good luck.
 
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