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am I overreacting mum??

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.

Ruth Goode

Well-Known Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Parent of person with diabetes
C started at Primary school in September, staffs in her class are wonderful but I'm concerned with those who look after her at lunch time. Yesterday she came out of school very hungry and staring blank she was hypo so I treated her and went home then discovered in her lunch box she didn't eat everything! That is the 2nd time it's happened, last time was because someone who watched her had to go so someone else supposed to watch her but s/he didn't. I don't know why it happened again yesterday but I have said if its happened again I will have to bring her home for lunch which would be unfair :-(
 
If the arrangement is someone is supposed to be watching your daughter then you are not over reacting. Have a word with the class teacher or who ever is in charge of the lunch time staff to discuss your concerns. You childs health is important and it is important she eats all of her lunch and that staff are aware when she has hypos.
 
We had arrangement that someone sit with her to make sure she eat all her lunch but its didn't happened twice now. I'm rather concerned now.
 
Ruth

You are absolutly not over reacting one bit any parent would be the same in this position, you trust the school to have a duty of care with your daughter and this care patently has not happened one two occasions,one time is bad enough but two is just appaling.Agree with Caroline about speaking to some one at the school.
 
I should have a word with her teacher, definitely. Explain that the school won't look good (Ofsted!!) if you have an agreed care plan, they don't follow it & as a result your daughter keels over hypo one day & ends up in a&e. Try & sort it informally to keep relations good if you can, but if it gets to the stage shere you feel you need to go formal ask for a copy of the school's complaints proceedure & follow it to the letter - you're more likely to get a reasonable response & a good result that way.

Best of luck.

Ps - have they had a copy of the jdrf info for primary schools?
 
Hi Ruth,

If School have agreed to follow the care plan then they have to do just that. I would email or speak to the Head and tell her the consequences of mistmatching insulin to carbs can be dangerous and it isnt as simple as you just want your child to eat lunch - if your child injects X insulin she needs to match it with X carbs - and tell her the worst case scenario of levels dropping quickly - and be blunt. This is not acceptable for such a young child to be left to their own devices and it really isnt asking much to check the food has been eaten is it!😱🙂
 
I agree, having some experience of observing what children eat at school lunch times, for a growth & development study (children were aged 7 to 8 years), that it's normal practice for lunchtime supervisors to check that what comes in lunch box is eaten. I also know that children are surprisingly good at swapping food items among themselves, as parents sometimes queried what we'd ticked in children's food diaries, so what they eat is necessarily what they're sent to school with. That's all without the potential problems of having insulin in system but no food. Although, if on MDI, then, in theory it's fine to miss a dose and a meal. But, most children need every meal possible.
 
Thank you all 🙂 I have told her teacher the one who do her testing and treating, she is the best person to inform so I'm waiting to find out what was the reason yesterday why C didn't finished her lunch. Hopefully it won't happen again but I'm seriously considering to take C home for lunch if its do happened again because I'm losing trust in them.
 
One of the things you can do if this doesn't get sorted PDQ is contact the school Governors who will take a serious view on their school not compying with a Care Plan.

In fact you can speak to em and have an informal chat. For all you know, there could be other kids.
 
I was at least 11/12 when i stopped for school lunches. Kids will be kids & might want to swap things & not eat what "you" have prepared. Good luck sorting 🙂
 
Hobie, how did you feel going home for lunch when you was younger? I don't really want to take C home because she will feel she's missing out fun with her friends
 
You my have to think whats best for c. I woudnt trust anybody to look after me never mind my kids. I know medical staff are good but a lunch time helper at school ? Some might be teachers but they are deff not medically trained. Like a lot of people they cofuse T1 & T2. In the past when young so called helpfull people (i know they ment well) have tryed to give me insulin when i was proper hypo ! 😱 The bit of brain that is still working comes to life THEN ! Good luck with "C" 🙂
 
I would be very concerned, it's potentially very dangerous, especially with such a young child going for so long without food regardless of what insulin regime they are on, they are so active and excitable. As others have said if the care plan is not being followed then people are answerable to that. We have had a similar issue in recent weeks at pre-school and a meeting was held at the school to iron it out, we had DSN on board. At the end of the day it would be a real shame if your little one had to come home for lunch because of this, not exactly inclusion is it ?



Good luck, you are not over-reacting by any means x
 
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Is it worth asking your daughter why she didn't eat her meal?

Just a thought. The sooner she can start to manage her own diabetes, the sooner she won't need to be entrusted to the care of others!
 
I was only a baby when diagnosed so went into the school system already diabetic. I was on two jabs a day so had to have mid morning & mid afternoon snacks when other kids weren't allowed to eat, & mum took me home for lunch. Although it was lovely being with mum at lunchtimes, I did feel like the odd one out (to put it mildly) & it did feel like other kids resented my different treatment. I was always definitely among the oddball kids & have never really felt that socially relaxed or confident. I'd suggest if you can get it sorted so that you are happy that she is safe (that's got to be thd primary concern), it might be better for her to feel as normal as possible (which sounds like what you'd already set up). I guess ultimately you know your daughter, the staff etc & will need to take a decision based on a kind of balance of risks...
 
Is it worth asking your daughter why she didn't eat her meal?

Just a thought. The sooner she can start to manage her own diabetes, the sooner she won't need to be entrusted to the care of others!

Hi MaryPlain,

The child is 4!!!!!!How many adults can cope with diabetes? I am shocked that you would think that such a young child should be responsible for their own care? A lot of 4 year olds still wet the bed and wear nappies at night. It is not acceptable for a School to leave a 4 year old in charge when the consequences could be fatal. Asking a 4 year old why they didnt eat all of their lunch is futile - they are still babies!😱🙂Bev
 
Hi MaryPlain,

The child is 4!!!!!!How many adults can cope with diabetes? I am shocked that you would think that such a young child should be responsible for their own care? A lot of 4 year olds still wet the bed and wear nappies at night. It is not acceptable for a School to leave a 4 year old in charge when the consequences could be fatal. Asking a 4 year old why they didnt eat all of their lunch is futile - they are still babies!😱🙂Bev

You misunderstand me: I'm not saying in any way that the school don't have a duty of care, and I'm not saying "hand it all over to the child to worry about". What I am saying is that a child of 4 is certainly capable of saying if there's something in their lunch box they don't like, or if they were full up, or if something happened that interrupted their lunch. I'm also saying that children with diabetes do need to be involved in their own care, and the sooner they are able to start taking care of themselves, the better. I'm not suggesting this is a process which would be complete any time soon but you have to start somewhere.

If you called my three year old grandson a baby he would be most indignant!
 
You misunderstand me: I'm not saying in any way that the school don't have a duty of care, and I'm not saying "hand it all over to the child to worry about". What I am saying is that a child of 4 is certainly capable of saying if there's something in their lunch box they don't like, or if they were full up, or if something happened that interrupted their lunch. I'm also saying that children with diabetes do need to be involved in their own care, and the sooner they are able to start taking care of themselves, the better. I'm not suggesting this is a process which would be complete any time soon but you have to start somewhere.

If you called my three year old grandson a baby he would be most indignant!

Hi MaryPlain,

I dont disagree that children should take some responsibility - but it has to be age-appropriate and clearly a 4 year old doesnt have the ability to understand that taking X insulin means they have to eat X carbs - hence the care plan. If the School cant cope with checking whether the child has eaten all the food - how can you expect a child to be so switched on that they know that not eating half an apple might mean they can have a hypo? They cant do the maths yet and as much as I agree that giving a child a good foundation is key to good diabetes control it does have to be age-appropriate. Yes - a child can tell you later why they didnt eat the food or that they got distracted - but that doesnt remove the issue that they havent eaten it - telling you why two hours later is not helpful - hence the need for a TA/Teacher to monitor the child and if not all food is eaten they should either ring the parent for advice or offer something else to eat - but it wasnt even noted which is the problem. I am certain that your little grandson wouldnt like being called a baby too - but he is - he he!😉🙂Bev
 
My lad's in year 1 at school...last year in reception a lot of kids weren't finishing their dinners (packed or hot) because they simply weren't used to the relatively brief time available to eat that they were getting at school. Definitely worth asking the little lady in question as well as other parsnts as this might be a factor.

I remember being relatively late to take responsibility for my diabetes, but i think that was because on 2 jabs (& a max 1 blood test a day) it really wasn't obvious about cause & effect, it all just seemed arbitrary & draconian. I guess the more you can explain, involve & normalise at any age thd better, but equally kids will mature at different rates...all part of the puzzle I guess! 🙂
 
Hi MaryPlain,

I dont disagree that children should take some responsibility - but it has to be age-appropriate and clearly a 4 year old doesnt have the ability to understand that taking X insulin means they have to eat X carbs - hence the care plan. If the School cant cope with checking whether the child has eaten all the food - how can you expect a child to be so switched on that they know that not eating half an apple might mean they can have a hypo? They cant do the maths yet and as much as I agree that giving a child a good foundation is key to good diabetes control it does have to be age-appropriate. Yes - a child can tell you later why they didnt eat the food or that they got distracted - but that doesnt remove the issue that they havent eaten it - telling you why two hours later is not helpful - hence the need for a TA/Teacher to monitor the child and if not all food is eaten they should either ring the parent for advice or offer something else to eat - but it wasnt even noted which is the problem. I am certain that your little grandson wouldnt like being called a baby too - but he is - he he!😉🙂Bev

I disagree. When he was a baby, he needed everything doing for him because he couldn't do it for himself. Now he feeds himself, talks, walks, takes himself to the toilet, asks for what he wants....

Again I think you misunderstand what I was suggesting. I am not saying that the school should not look after her. However if it turns out that there is a specific reason why the child didn't eat her lunch, then that could help prevent it happening again. Also I do believe that you can say to a 4 year old that it's important to eat all their lunch. Yes, the adults in charge should be making sure that happens, and doing something about it if for some reason she doesn't. That doesn't alter the fact that the more the child understands the better her control will be and the better her Mum will feel about it.
 
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