Rant: Ignorance at school

[Lily123]

If they have a car, 6 miles is not far for someone to travel to support you and Diabetes UK. It may be worth contacting them and asking.

I looked at the website for the nearest support gorup and they haven’t posted anything since 2017 - might be worth contacting them so I may do that tomorrow and enquire at school if an assembly (or something like that) could be held to educate people on diabetes

 

[Sally71]

Good luck with that, hope you can do something. My daughter went all through primary school with people not sharing sweets with her because they thought she couldn’t have them, teachers not allowing her to share in treats at parties and food tastings even though she knew how to do the insulin for it, and then not believing me when I tried to explain, she did several talks to the class about what her diabetes meant and even an assembly to the whole school with the DSN helping her and still people used to think it was funny to hide her bag with her test kit and hypo treatments in. Some people just don’t want to be educated. Secondary school is better, the staff seem much more switched on and will listen to me rather than thinking they know better themselves, and there seems to be an unwritten rule between students that you don’t tease/bully someone about medical conditions; someone made a similar comment in front of my daughter and before she had time to react several other children pinned him up against a wall and made him apologise! Unfortunately whenever anything is mentioned about diabetes in class (usually relating to type 2) everyone looks at my daughter, and when she tries to explain that she’s type 1 and it’s not the same they just say “that’s your excuse”. Well the ones that don’t know her well or don’t like her do anyway. She gave up trying to explain because people like that never learn.

 

[Lily123]

Good luck with that, hope you can do something. My daughter went all through primary school with people not sharing sweets with her because they thought she couldn’t have them, teachers not allowing her to share in treats at parties and food tastings even though she knew how to do the insulin for it, and then not believing me when I tried to explain, she did several talks to the class about what her diabetes meant and even an assembly to the whole school with the DSN helping her and still people used to think it was funny to hide her bag with her test kit and hypo treatments in. Some people just don’t want to be educated. Secondary school is better, the staff seem much more switched on and will listen to me rather than thinking they know better themselves, and there seems to be an unwritten rule between students that you don’t tease/bully someone about medical conditions; someone made a similar comment in front of my daughter and before she had time to react several other children pinned him up against a wall and made him apologise! Unfortunately whenever anything is mentioned about diabetes in class (usually relating to type 2) everyone looks at my daughter, and when she tries to explain that she’s type 1 and it’s not the same they just say “that’s your excuse”. Well the ones that don’t know her well or don’t like her do anyway. She gave up trying to explain because people like that never learn.

That’s really unfortunate for what you daughter went though at primary school. I’ve never had anyone steal my testing kit or anything like that luckily and people tend to not realise that I have Type 1. The comment that was made, the person wasn’t aware I have diabetes but it doesn’t make it right for him to have said that. I hope I can either run a stool at the fundraising event or an assembly (not mentioning any incidents but just about diabetes)

 

[Lily123]

You were upset that they were being mean to each other, er no, something they randomly said (to each other) as a prelude to physical violence.

Your mum has the right idea, do not get involved in domestic squabbles, or men's troubles, it can very easily draw you in.

It was not that they were being mean to each other that upset me, more that being sat in the middle of it makes it hard not to listen in. I won’t make a fuss over this incident but I will see if at the next school fundraising event I can fundraise for Diabetes UK or do an assembly about diabetes . Might actually help to stop at least a few hundred people being ignorant

 

[Sally71]

That’s really unfortunate for what you daughter went though at primary school. I’ve never had anyone steal my testing kit or anything like that luckily and people tend to not realise that I have Type 1. The comment that was made, the person wasn’t aware I have diabetes but it doesn’t make it right for him to have said that. I hope I can either run a stool at the fundraising event or an assembly (not mentioning any incidents but just about diabetes)

Education is good but here’s another thing. The boy was only repeating what he’s heard loads of other people say. Even if you tell him different, sadly the majority of people (and the media) will still continue to repeat and believe that diabetes is caused by eating the wrong kind of food. So you can’t really blame someone for repeating what the majority of people believe to be true. My daughter has OCD. How many times have you heard people say things like “oh I’m so OCD, I have to have all my books and CDs organised alphabetically” or something like that? I used to say similar things myself, but having now lived through what OCD is really like, I’ll never say that again, it’s the most horrible, debilitating condition. Just having your bookshelf organised a particular way is not OCD, it’s just being a bit fussy. We’d have a hell of a job trying to convince the rest of the world that they are wrong though, and most of them don’t really care and will never need to find out anything different so it’s not worth wasting energy getting upset about it. We all think we understand something about various medical problems, but until you’ve actually had to live through it you don’t really have a clue and why should you be expected to?

 

[Lily123]

Education is good but here’s another thing. The boy was only repeating what he’s heard loads of other people say. Even if you tell him different, sadly the majority of people (and the media) will still continue to repeat and believe that diabetes is caused by eating the wrong kind of food. My daughter has OCD. How many times have you heard people say things like “oh I’m so OCD, I have to have all my books and CDs organised alphabetically” or something like that? I used to say similar things myself, but having now lived through what OCD is really like, I’ll never say that again, it’s the most horrible, debilitating condition. Just having your bookshelf organised a particular way is not OCD, it’s just being a bit fussy. We’d have a hell of a job trying to convince the rest of the world that they are wrong though, and most of them don’t really care and will never need to find out anything different so it’s not worth wasting energy getting upset about it.

True - but if an assembly at school is an option for educating other students then I think it’s a good idea as even if it’s only a couple of hundred people that are no longer ignorance then it is worth it. The assembly's we have at school are the whole of Year 7, Year 8 and Year 9 so that is about 600

 

[Sally71]

Good for you if you can organise it, and if you can change a few people’s opinions then that’s great, just don’t expect to change everyone’s. Unfortunately the people most likely to make offensive comments are also the ones most likely to be not paying attention to your efforts.

 

[Lily123]

Yes, having slightly thicker skin will help you find inner peace.

Unless someone is personally involved in an issue chances are they will not care one way or the other.

If you stand up in assembly and talk about diabetes you will be putting yourself in a spotlight, and running the risk of being branded as "That diabetic girl." If you can sing or play piano, perhaps you could entertain and maybe provide a little education. In the style of @Northerner who likes to write poetry. Options.

I might go with the fundraising as I do have a fear of speaking in front of everyone but I’m not sure

 

[Lily123]

Good for you if you can organise it, and if you can change a few people’s opinions then that’s great, just don’t expect to change everyone’s. Unfortunately the people most likely to make offensive comments are also the ones most likely to be not paying attention to your efforts.

True

 

[Lily123]

If you do some fundraising events, that would give you something to talk about at assembly, and help take the focus off you.

Speaking/performing in front of people is a liberating experience. I highly recommend it.

Their is a fair at school the day before half term and if I was to run a stool then all the money made could go to Diabetes UK

 

[Inka]

I might go with the fundraising as I do have a fear of speaking in front of everyone but I’m not sure

I don’t see why you need to speak in front of people if you don’t want to. Couldn’t a talk be given by a teacher in a lesson like PSHE? It could cover diabetes, but could also extend to a few other common medical conditions. The points are that people shouldn’t be joking about medical things and also that they would benefit from a little education.

Although a very small number of people might ignore it and carry on anyway, most people just haven’t stopped to think, and once they do and are given some explanations, they amend their behaviour.

 

[rayray119]

Good luck with that, hope you can do something. My daughter went all through primary school with people not sharing sweets with her because they thought she couldn’t have them, teachers not allowing her to share in treats at parties and food tastings even though she knew how to do the insulin for it, and then not believing me when I tried to explain, she did several talks to the class about what her diabetes meant and even an assembly to the whole school with the DSN helping her and still people used to think it was funny to hide her bag with her test kit and hypo treatments in. Some people just don’t want to be educated. Secondary school is better, the staff seem much more switched on and will listen to me rather than thinking they know better themselves, and there seems to be an unwritten rule between students that you don’t tease/bully someone about medical conditions; someone made a similar comment in front of my daughter and before she had time to react several other children pinned him up against a wall and made him apologise! Unfortunately whenever anything is mentioned about diabetes in class (usually relating to type 2) everyone looks at my daughter, and when she tries to explain that she’s type 1 and it’s not the same they just say “that’s your excuse”. Well the ones that don’t know her well or don’t like her do anyway. She gave up trying to explain because people like that never learn.

hide her bag with the test kit and hypo treatments that's really dangerous?

 

[Sally71]

hide her bag with the test kit and hypo treatments that's really dangerous?

Doesn’t happen any more thankfully, she went to a different secondary school from everyone else and had a complete fresh start, carries everything in her main bag now instead of a separate one (for that reason probably!) and everyone there seems to have accepted it much better. Unfortunately she didn’t tell me how bad the problem was until after she left the primary school and it was too late to do anything about it (probably because she knew I’d have gone absolutely mental)

 

[Lily123]

I don’t see why you need to speak in front of people if you don’t want to. Couldn’t a talk be given by a teacher in a lesson like PSHE? It could cover diabetes, but could also extend to a few other common medical conditions. The points are that people shouldn’t be joking about medical things and also that they would benefit from a little education.

Although a very small number of people might ignore it and carry on anyway, most people just haven’t stopped to think, and once they do and are given some explanations, they amend their behaviour.

I spoke to one the teachers who works in student services (the office we go to to fill the form in) and she just said it’s a case of ignorance and that the boy who said it didn’t understand and listened to much to what the media says. The teacher told me that her mum is Type 2 so she understood why I was annoyed at the stereotyping

 

[rayray119]

I'll admit there was a time in my life I used to think one form of diabetes made your blood sugar go too low and the other too high now I kick myself for thinking that.

 

[Sally71]

I spoke to one the teachers who works in student services (the office we go to to fill the form in) and she just said it’s a case of ignorance and that the boy who said it didn’t understand and listened to much to what the media says. The teacher told me that her mum is Type 2 so she understood why I was annoyed at the stereotyping

We found that, people will listen to anyone on the telly or social media or read anything written in a trashy magazine and that must be true, but they won’t listen to the person who actually has to live with the condition

 

[Lily123]

We found that, people will listen to anyone on the telly or social media or read anything written in a trashy magazine and that must be true, but they won’t listen to the person who actually has to live with the condition

I think it’s partly to do with the fact that the media will use anything as headlines

 

[Sally71]

My daughter has permitted me to add this. She also has tics, like Tourette syndrome although it hasn’t been diagnosed as such. The school did assemblies to all years 7-11 about tics and such problems and she still gets bullied about it. On the school bus just before Christmas her tics were particularly bad one morning, and a group of year 8 boys were all laughing at her, mocking her, at least one was filming her on his phone and all the others were asking for the file to be sent to them. That’s the sort of thing that should be reported, not a throwaway ignorant comment that’s not even directed at you, save your energy for more significant issues otherwise you are going to spend a lot of time getting upset. Yes we get why such comments are annoying and you can tell people why it’s wrong but many people won’t understand and if you keep making complaints people will get fed up. My daughter has also had people asking her what her pump tube is for and then threatening to cut it, yes she has spares at school but they don’t know that, we wondered if that could be classed as attempted murder?! She didn’t report that one but wonders now if she should have done, she didn’t want the hassle of filling forms in at the time. The incident on the bus was reported by someone else, two other year 11 girls stood up for her and went absolutely mental at the boys (one of them knew them because her brother was in the same year) and then later the head of year went to find her to see if she was OK and to say that if they found any evidence of video footage they would make sure it was destroyed.

Good luck with your assembly or fund raising or whatever you decide to do, if you can educate a few people at least then that’s got to be a good thing 🙂

 

[Lily123]

My daughter has permitted me to add this. She also has tics, like Tourette syndrome although it hasn’t been diagnosed as such. The school did assemblies to all years 7-11 about tics and such problems and she still gets bullied about it. On the school bus just before Christmas her tics were particularly bad one morning, and a group of year 8 boys were all laughing at her, mocking her, at least one was filming her on his phone and all the others were asking for the file to be sent to them. That’s the sort of thing that should be reported, not a throwaway ignorant comment that’s not even directed at you, save your energy for more significant issues otherwise you are going to spend a lot of time getting upset. Yes we get why such comments are annoying and you can tell people why it’s wrong but many people won’t understand and if you keep making complaints people will get fed up. My daughter has also had people asking her what her pump tube is for and then threatening to cut it, yes she has spares at school but they don’t know that, we wondered if that could be classed as attempted murder?! She didn’t report that one but wonders now if she should have done, she didn’t want the hassle of filling forms in at the time. The incident on the bus was reported by someone else, two other year 11 girls stood up for her and went absolutely mental at the boys (one of them knew them because her brother was in the same year) and then later the head of year went to find her to see if she was OK and to say that if they found any evidence of video footage they would make sure it was destroyed.

Good luck with your assembly or fund raising or whatever you decide to do, if you can educate a few people at least then that’s got to be a good thing 🙂

That’s absolutely awful what those boys did to your daughter! I think threatening to cut a pump tube would be threatening someones life

 

[Inka]

That’s shocking @Sally71 I hope it was dealt with severely.