Waiting room conversations

[Flower]

I don’t mind having a friendly chat about the weather or tech & insulin pumps in clinic waiting rooms, I spend enough of my time sitting in them with the complications I have. Today I had to go to a different diabetic foot clinic the other side of town.

I walked in to the waiting room and sat down. There was one other person there pacing around, I said hello and left it at that. They then stood in front of me and said they could read faces & minds! Uh oh! I was actually thinking please don’t ask me why my leg is in a cast or tell me to eat cinnamon because I can’t bear it but quickly tried to think of sunlit meadows & tweety birds ‘just in case’. Out of the blue they said ‘you’re vegetarian aren’t you’. I mean I am vegetarian but what a weird opening gambit guessing if someone eats fish and meat and getting it right. I suppose you’re going to be right some of the time.

I said yes and hoped the analysis would stop. They then told me to start eating meat immediately & drink more milk and my bones would mend. The bones in my ankles and feet are mainly metal screws and plates so I really don’t think extra milk will help the situation. Why do strangers feel the need to advise me on what I should do when they don’t know what’s wrong.

I’m happy to have a pass the time of day chat but this was really unnerving. I was willing my name to be called so I could leave. I checked on the way out to see what other clinics were running there-podiatry, physio and cardiology but no mind reading. Freaky.

 

[eggyg]

I don’t mind having a friendly chat about the weather or tech & insulin pumps in clinic waiting rooms, I spend enough of my time sitting in them with the complications I have. Today I had to go to a different diabetic foot clinic the other side of town.

I walked in to the waiting room and sat down. There was one other person there pacing around, I said hello and left it at that. They then stood in front of me and said they could read faces & minds! Uh oh! I was actually thinking please don’t ask me why my leg is in a cast or tell me to eat cinnamon because I can’t bear it but quickly tried to think of sunlit meadows & tweety birds ‘just in case’. Out of the blue they said ‘you’re vegetarian aren’t you’. I mean I am vegetarian but what a weird opening gambit guessing if someone eats fish and meat and getting it right. I suppose you’re going to be right some of the time.

I said yes and hoped the analysis would stop. They then told me to start eating meat immediately & drink more milk and my bones would mend. The bones in my ankles and feet are mainly metal screws and plates so I really don’t think extra milk will help the situation. Why do strangers feel the need to advise me on what I should do when they don’t know what’s wrong.

I’m happy to have a pass the time of day chat but this was really unnerving. I was willing my name to be called so I could leave. I checked on the way out to see what other clinics were running there-podiatry, physio and cardiology but no mind reading. Freaky.

That was weird, and unsettling. What gives some folks the right to say those sort of things to a total stranger? I know why they say “ there’s nowt funnier than folk.”

 

[Lauren]

That's so odd! Sorry you went through this. I've had the odd strange conversation now and again, but always at a time when I could just leave!

 

[HayleyR]

Oh no, that's awful especially as you couldn't escape!!

 

[Alan44]

@Flower sorry but I find that some what funny and your account made me smile.

Not in a clinic, but our local pub, my fiancé (at the time) and I were having a drink having just got engaged, when a rather intoxicated lady approached us and started chatting, we explained that we had just got engaged and will be getting married in 6 months time.

We expected to be congratulated, but oh no, she replied, in a loud voice "DONT DO IT, IT WONT LAST" my wife to be was totally stunned as was I.

Fortunately I knew the manager, who on hearing her words of condemnation escorted her off the premises and congratulated us on our forthcoming nuptials and bought us a drink.

That was nearly 26 years ago and we are still happily married (or so my wife tells me)

Aint life fun

 

[Flower]

Glad you didn’t listen to the unwanted advice @Alan44 .

After I’d left the clinic and was safely on the bus I did laugh at myself for even considering that they might be able to read my mind. It was the “you’re vegetarian aren’t you” that really unnerved me as it seemed such a random but correct statement.

 

[Ieva DUK]

Some people are freakishly good at reading others and use it to cause stir ups. To do it in a waiting room is so unnerving. My mind instantly races to the worst case scenario, of some people like that trying to find 'vulnerable folk' to take advantage of, but I think that's just my own caution in such situations speaking. I could imagine someone going through a rough patch and here comes someone who is a stranger but 'knows you', how comforting that could feel. As the great internet sometimes says - 'audacity must have been on sale where they live'. I will never understand what gives others the idea to give unwarranted advice in situations like that 🙄

 

[helli]

It is amazing what strangers tell you.
Early in my relationship with my long term partner, we were dancing in a club. Most people were a tad inebriated (us included).
A guy came up to me convinced my partner and I were not sorted because “he is too good looking to be straight”. Nearly twenty years later, we are still together and he had given me no suggestions he is anything but straight.
At least he took the comment as a compliment.

 

[Inka]

You should have said No you’re not veggie and then told them you were a cannibal @Flower ! I can’t bear people who impose themselves on you like that then talk utter rubbish.

 

[Flower]

You should have said No you’re not veggie and then told them you were a cannibal @Flower ! I can’t bear people who impose themselves on you like that then talk utter rubbish.

I did briefly consider saying I wasn’t veggie @Inka (didn’t consider cannibalism though!) but I thought they might be able to tell I was lying! I was a bit rattled by the whole situation.

 

[JimG]

I do dislike it when people tell you what you must do, even if they don't know you and your circumstances. I do try to be pleasant to people I meet but a smile and an "Hello" and a comment on the sun/wind/rain etc. is usually as far as it often goes. It adds to the pleasure of a walk. I am happy to be involved in conversations but those that turn into dogmatic statements do make me, like you, wish to be elsewhere. In fact, one of the things I like about this forum is that there is so much experience and so much advice that is usually offered as the "You might like to try..." or "... worked for me" way of giving advice not the "You must...or else you will be condemned to..." approach.

 

[helli]

I do dislike it when people tell you what you must do, even if they don't know you and your circumstances. I do try to be pleasant to people I meet but a smile and an "Hello" and a comment on the sun/wind/rain etc. is usually as far as it often goes. It adds to the pleasure of a walk. I am happy to be involved in conversations but those that turn into dogmatic statements do make me, like you, wish to be elsewhere. In fact, one of the things I like about this forum is that there is so much experience and so much advice that is usually offered as the "You might like to try..." or "... worked for me" way of giving advice not the "You must...or else you will be condemned to..." approach.

That's probably because anyone who suggests " You must ..." will be "condemned to ..." by other members of the forum

Seriously though, I think the "Please Remember" at the top of every page is a helpful reminder that "everyone manages their health differently."

 

[nonethewiser]

I don’t mind having a friendly chat about the weather or tech & insulin pumps in clinic waiting rooms, I spend enough of my time sitting in them with the complications I have. Today I had to go to a different diabetic foot clinic the other side of town.

I walked in to the waiting room and sat down. There was one other person there pacing around, I said hello and left it at that. They then stood in front of me and said they could read faces & minds! Uh oh! I was actually thinking please don’t ask me why my leg is in a cast or tell me to eat cinnamon because I can’t bear it but quickly tried to think of sunlit meadows & tweety birds ‘just in case’. Out of the blue they said ‘you’re vegetarian aren’t you’. I mean I am vegetarian but what a weird opening gambit guessing if someone eats fish and meat and getting it right. I suppose you’re going to be right some of the time.

I said yes and hoped the analysis would stop. They then told me to start eating meat immediately & drink more milk and my bones would mend. The bones in my ankles and feet are mainly metal screws and plates so I really don’t think extra milk will help the situation. Why do strangers feel the need to advise me on what I should do when they don’t know what’s wrong.

I’m happy to have a pass the time of day chat but this was really unnerving. I was willing my name to be called so I could leave. I checked on the way out to see what other clinics were running there-podiatry, physio and cardiology but no mind reading. Freaky.

That is so uncalled for that, what makes some people think they can preach to others what they should & shouldn't do.

Really feel for you @Flower Not a pleasant experience for anyone just minding their own business waiting for a appointment. Wonder if this empty head would have spoke the same way if you were a man? Put it all behind you as I'm sure you will.

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

I think you handled that unfortunate encounter very graciously @Flower

But I did chuckle slightly at the idea of you furiously thinking of sunlit meadows and tweety birds