Type 2...Insulin Prescribed & Scared :(

[Ellowyne]

Well, I have been to see my Dr today and she has said that because of my other health issues with my Panceaus and Gall Bladder, I have had problems with taking Metformin and Gliclazide, she now feels that Insulin is the way forward to managing my Diabetes. She looked at some other Diabetic medication, however, she said that they too may affect my other organs and it probably was not wise to try them

I now have an appointment with the Diabetic nurse on Tuesday to get me started on insulin....I am still unsure how I feel about this, again, I feel like the first day I found out that I was diabetic...kind of numb I just feel so low and sad, tearful, and bloody angry at myself....I feel that this is my own fault!

After her listening to my heart, I am also having to have a 24 hour ECG done, I have been getting some heart palpitations and been feeling light headed and sweaty. I have to have a resting ECG done tommorow then she is refering me for the 24 hour one. I am unsure how this works?...Forgot to ask her!

To top it off, she is sending me for a Liver Scan. The reason for the Liver scan is because medication, Fentanyl, that I was on last year, has been known to cause perminent damage to the Liver. When I have taken the Diabetic medication, the pain I have is both in the location of my Liver and Gall bladder.

This all feel like too much to cope with at once..I am just in a daze. I am asking myself, is Insulin so bad?...Will I feel better when I am on it?

You know, I'm just going to put this out there for you guys...For some time now I keep having this thought that I don't have long...I feel that I am dying. I know this sounds so ludecrous, dramatic, but, I just have this feeling and I never used to feel like this. I have started preparing things for if I die, papers, letters, my funeral wishes.

Perhaps this is all in my head, big time!...I just can't help the way I feel...I am so sorry to go on this way, I am in tears as I write this, I feel so alone and scared...no one undertsands, it's like society thinks of Diabetes being like a bloody headache, no one seems to take it seroiusly!

7 months on and I have background retoniopathy and so many problems with my other organs that I can't cope with Diabetic medication and now being put on Insulin. I know I don't have to take it, but, what else is there for me to do?....If I was'nt to take it, how serious could things get for me?

Sorry, so many questions in this post, I sound like a mad woman...again!

Sorry, Ellowyne.

 

[Northerner]

Ellowynne, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us. It's not surprising after all that you have been through that you feel despairing at times. But I think that the insulin will be a very good step for you. Do not be afraid of it, I know that a lot of people who are started out on other medication or diet and exercise fear it - that they have somehow failed, and that now it has got 'serious'. It is just another form of medication, that has to be administered in a slightly different way. Don't worry about the injections - they are virtually (and often completely) painless. They are nothing like injections for blood or tetanus etc., just tiny needles a few millimetres long that go into fatty tissue just under the skin. The insulin is then absorbed slowly through the tiny capillary blood vessels to do its work.

And...it will bring down your levels and improve your quality of life and your moods! Don't be afraid of it, think of it as a positive step, and remember also that you are far from alone - there are many, many people here who will help you with your concerns - so don't ever be afraid to ask. I'm glad that they have made this decision for you! I hope that your other scans come up fine too. I have had many ECGs but not a 24 hour one - I think others here have though (Bev?), so hopefully they will see this and let you know.

PM me any time.🙂

 

[ukjohn]

Hi Ellowyne

I'm sorry to hear about the problems you have been getting, diabetes never seams to be straight forward and hits some harder than others. Notherner has given some good advice in his posting, and I would like to try and assure you not to fear insulin. I am type2 for 4 years now and have been on insulin since the day I was diagnosed, I am on Novorapid (fast acting) and Levimer (long lasting) I am on 6 injections a day and it is now just a part of my routine. As regards to liver scan, I had that done when in hospital at diagnoses, theres is nothing to that it is just like a pregnancy scan (not that I've had one of those lol) I've not had a ECG 24 hour check, but did have a 24 hour blood pressure moniter, thats fun when sitting next to someone on a bus and the thing springs into action pumping up the cuff which happens every half hour. I hope things go well for you and if I can help in any way please feel free to give me a shout.

John.

 

[Steff]

hi Ellowynne sorry to hear this , as john says diabetes never seem to be straight forward always throwing yet another problem our way,sorry i cant advise or give any advice on insulin but im sure the many in here that are on will help you out

p.s I reiterate what Northener said PM me anytime im younger but im a good listener and i have a wise head on my shoulder so i have been told

take care xx

 

[Copepod]

Hi Ellowyne
Sorry to hear it's all happening at once.
A 24 hour ECG is simply when you wear the pads and leads for 24 hours (the clus is in the name!) so that the box can collect data about how your heart works through day, night, activity, sleep etc - the results are downloaded from the box to be reviewed. So, it should pick up palpitations that don't conveniently happen when you're at the surgery. It's a bit of a nuisance, but the technicians will explain any limitations eg what yout can get wet and what you should keep dry. Often palpiations feel odd, but aren't actually dangerous - the 24 hour ECG will enable your team to work out if treatment is required at all, and if so, what is right for you.
Insulin is a powerful drug, but it relatively "clean" ie it doesn't need to be excreted by kidney or liver, which is handy if you have any degree of kidney or liver damage, however caused. It's also flexible, although degree of flexibility depends on the type - bimodal regime commits you to eating regular amounts at regular times, while basal bolus regime or MDI (multi dose insulin) can be adapted to what you want to eat and when. Main thing to remember is that if you need insulin, you need insulin. You can make accepting that fact as easy or difficult as you choose - but it's normal to be frightened, frustrated etc initially, then it gradually gets easier.
The can of your liver will probably be an ultrasound scan - same as used to look at babies in the womb, so it's very safe - just the jelly feels a bit cold and wet. The scan, in combination with liver function blood tests, your team will have a better idea of how you liver is functioning.

 

[twinnie]

hi there so sorry you are having a hard time
i have not long started insulin and i was scared but its was the best thing for me my control is so much better as northner says its virtally painless
i had problems with my gallbadder too but its been removed now
i wish you all the best and a big hug ()

 

[Adrienne]

Hi Ellowyne

I'm so sorry you have all these feelings and are scared. I know I would be scared as well and nervous. I won't pretend to know how you feel as I am not diabetic, I have a child who is though so even though our feelings are very different, they are as intense I'm sure.

I want to tell you not to be scared. If the meds weren't working and causing more damages its a good thing to be off of them and onto something that will help. Insulin is an unknown quantity to you, but it isn't for lots of us on here. I've dealt with loads of different insulins in 9 years for my 9 year old daughter and it is truely remarkable what insulin can do. I have found when I speak to others who have type 2 (which you are) and they have had to progress on to insulin, they feel they are failing. This is so wrong. It is just another part of diabetes and it actually means you will now have more control, you just need to learn it all again.

As for the thinking you are dying, this I can relate to. I am very overweight and for some reason stay overweight. My daughter is 9 and I am single (which is a good thing for me and her by the way so it is choice) but because her needs are so complex (she doesn't have a pancreas so has type 1 with bells on 🙂) I am the one person who knows everything and looks after her. Due to this I am in panic mode, inside my head, on a daily basis, thinking all sorts of things that could happen ie heart attack etc etc. I think I might go and see if I can have a proper once over to reassure me. Why don't you? Pay private if you can and get it done quickly, one of these well woman thingys. It may help you.

Take care and look forward not backward and think of this as actually a positive thing if you can. 🙂

 

[bev]

Hi Ellowyne,

Sorry you are feeling so down (understandable). I just wanted to let you know about the 24 ECG. I had one last month. It is a simple contraption really, resembles an insulin pump. 5 or 6 sticky pads are placed around your chest area, and electrodes attached to them which link up onto the small box that you clip onto your waist. There is no screen or anything for you to see. You wear it for 24 hours and cant shower or have a bath! You do your normal routine and sleep as normal. Then you drop it off to the consulant and they 'read' the results on screen.

I was having a 'fluttering' feeling in my heart and was very worried that i had a heart abnormality. It turned out that i just had an 'ectopic rythm' in my heart. This is very common and nothing to worry about.

I am sure that you will get the best tests available and if there is anything found that is worrying - you will no doubt recieve the best medical treatment available. I think the GP is just covering all bases and is probably just trying to re-assure you that there is nothing seriously wrong. I know its easy for me to say - but please try not to worry - you are in the best hands. The NHS gets a bad press most of the time - but i do think they do a brilliant job and do the best for everyone. Take one thing at a time and try to stay positive. I will be thinking of you and hope you can let us know how things are going with every test you have.🙂Bev x

 

[Ellowyne]

Thank you so much everyone, I feel overwhelmed by all your kind and encouraging words.

Yes, I do feel that I have failed in some way, I can't seem to stop crying, I just feel a bit beaten down with everything! It seems every corner I turn there is another problem to have to cope with, be it with my health, or family problems

My son is not too well, he has mental health issues and is really struggling, he refuses to leave the house at all now, not even attending his therapy sessions. He has Social Anxiety Phobia, Agoraphobia and depression, it is his 18th B'day in 2 weeks time and he only has me and his Dad to share his B'day with. He leads a very lonely and isolated life and it is heartbreaking to see your child in so much pain, be it physical or mental pain. He only really will speak to me about any of his problems and I am worried what would happen if I was not here to look after him....it scares me so much.

I guess I am going off the subject of Diabetes slightly, but, it's when your not well and trying to cope with everything else, sometimes I feel so, so desperate. I pray that Insulin may mean a turning point for me, I guess at least it will not interfere with my other health problems. The thing that scares me most is the thought of having to cope with working out the dosage, my brain is not all that clever!...And mostly, I am scared of Hypo's and losing my car My car is my legs, literally!! I walk with a tri wheeler and I would never get out of the house without my car....if it meant no car, I could not take the Insulin!

Thank you all again, I feel blessed to of found this site, I don't know how I would of coped without being able to have a safe place like this....Thank you.

I will let you know how I get on. I have the appointment with the Diabetic nurse on Tuesday. I guess she will decide what Insulin to start me on?...Or is there any kind that I should ask for?.....I am unsure what questions I need to ask her?

Ellowyne xXx

 

[Copepod]

driving with insulin; son's problems

Ellowyne, a very quick bit of reassurance - starting on insulin does not mean you have to give up your car driving (or motorbike) licence, although you will loose the right the drive minibuses, vans, anything bigger, taxis in some council areas. DVLA website (or council for taxis) is the place to check. The key point is to follow advice on DVLA website and in letters sent to you - always check blood glucose before driving (so have meter with you at all times), eat and / or delay journey if appropriate, always stop as soon as safe if you feel low etc. It's unpredictable hypoglycaemia that's the problem, not insulin per se.
And don't be afraid to discuss other problems with your diabetes team - ideally, although, admittedly, not always in practice, they should consider you as a whole person. Please say happy birthday to your son from me, but only if you think it won't make things worse. Is there any chance of his therapists coming to your home, if he won't leave? Also, is he claiming DLA, because it sounds like he should be able to get some help, eg a rate of Care Component, although he may not get Lower Rate Mobility if DWP take the view that he wouldn't leave the house even if someone accompanied him.

 

[bev]

Ellowyne,

I am sorry to hear that your son is suffering. Does he have any outside help for his problems? Does he see the GP? I know it is very sad that he is lonely and isolated- but he does have two parents who love him and i am sure you will make him feel good on his birthday. Please wish him a happy birthday from me (as long as it wont cause him any upset).
If your son doesnt recieve any help/support from anyone outside of the family I would strongly advise that you see your/his GP and try to get him some. It is heartbreaking that such a young man is suffering so much anxiety and loneliness. There is help out there - you just need to be pushy.
I wish you luck and hope things calm down very soon for you all.🙂Bev x

 

[rossi_mac]

Hi Ellowyne

Sorry to hear your feeling the way you are at the moment, and it does sound like you have a lot on your plate.

As others have said you can still drive cars whilst being on insulin, so no problmes there, and I hope when you start on insulin things begin to get better.

Take care, and let us all know how you're doing.

Rossi🙂

 

[Moamber]

Hi There
Just read your letter, am sorry to here of your troubles .
Like you I was put on to insulin ( was taking Metformin too, but Dr took me off them cos of Kidney Failure stage 4)I have found it hard at first adjusting , but now its ok- Thank god! I too feel low at times , and know where you are coming from and I try to stay positive, I know its blimmin hard at times
I aso have 3 srents in my heart, had a stroke, left me as I can't walk, plus inco cos of a surgeon, Asthma ... also have NeoRecormon another jab a week lol . and have B12 inj.. plus the insulin🙄
Please Love don't give up . Keep going . and chin up high
If want to chat anytime . send me a pm, am here all the time🙂
Love to your son too ........ go get help! Its out there and you have to fight - I know have been there....

Take care & Love
Hugs Mo xx

 

[falcon123]

Hi,

No need to worry. It might even work out better than you think. A friend was diagnosed in his early sixties and put on metformin. Like many other people this did not give very good control and he was advised to go onto insulin. This has worked very well and he is on quite a low dose - just two injections a day. He is now retired, feels far fitter and has a BMI of 22 - 23. His routine also includes 2 - 3 visits to the gym each week.

 

[Ellowyne]

Thank you for all your replys and kind comments.

As for my son, we have now applied for DLA and was told that we should of done this a long time ago, the thing is that when problems are part of your everyday life you, well, just get on with them! We are going to be discussing my son having a Key/suport worker at his reveiw on the 10th Nov, would be good for him to have someone to work with him from home.

As for Insulin...thanks to all your encouraging messages I am feeling a little less scared today, like so many of you have said, perhaps this will be the best way forward for me now, I might even feel a little more well!...At the moment I feel so tired all of the time.

I just want to say 'Thank you' again, to all of you. I know that so many of you have so much to cope with yourselves and yet you still take the time out to offer so much support and care...You all deserve medals in my eyes! I really do mean that because all your messages and been of so much help to me...I hope that one day I too can be of support to someone here...well, once I am educated myself with this complex Diabetes!

Love to all...Ellowyne xXx