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Rant or cry?

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.
Gillsb

Gillsb

Active Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Parent of person with diabetes
Had to write this just to get things off my chest.

Have not had the easiest 8 months with my daughter who is 16. Nasty case of glandular fever starting last September which seemed to go on and on for ever. Started with a pump in January and although we love it I am not going to pretend it has been easy. We seem to get everything under control and then her body changes again. I know its recovering from illness and hormones so we just try and get on with things.

Having missed half the school year, she actually starts her GCSE's today which will then be followed by her tonsils coming out in the holidays.

To cut a long story short, she hurt her foot on Saturday evening - not badly but having complained about it most of the day yesterday I decided to pop her down to our local Minor Injuries for them to put her mind at rest (and mine I guess). It wasn't a wound and bearing in mind she was putting weight on it I didn't expect anything to be wrong. I was only looking for some reassurance as she has become quite anxious over the past few months of illness.

After a very harsh lecture from the nurse about why had we left it all day, "she only has one pair of feet". "My friend is in hospital having his leg amputated at the moment". "You could be sat here next year with a false leg". "Your circulartion is bad enough anyway". "You might think it will never happen to you". "What are you going to do about these hypos ?" GET THE IDEA!

I left the hospital with the confirmation it is only as soft tissue injury but with a very upset daughter and to be honest I feel dreadful. We having been dealing with this condition since she was 12 and the past few months have been the hardest. Yes I wish we had perfect control - there are lots of things I wish.....but in the meantime we just do our best!

Rant over, sorry!
 
Oh my goodness Gill, no wonder you are both so angry and upset! 😡 How completely insensitive and unnecessary all that was - and for a soft tissue injury too! We are all aware of the potential problems that diabetes can cause us, but you actually did the right thing - you sought help, and in a very sensible timescale! Is your daughter's circulation poor? Did whoever said this actually know this? Frightening children in this manner is completely wrong in my opinion, unless maybe the child couldn't give a fig about their control, which clearly is not the case here.

I'd be tempted to complain. There are ways in which the potential dangers of complications can be conveyed, but this was most certainly not appropriate in this situation.

I hope that your daughter is able to calm down and that her exams go well - wishing her the very best of luck 🙂
 
Feeling a bit better having had a moan. She has never had a problem with circulation - since going on the pump we have a great team to support us and our GP has been fantastic and very understanding. She gave her a once over whilst she was ill with glandular fever and checked her feet then and they were fine. I think the comment was made yesterday because her feet were cold.
 
Hi GillsB, sounds like you and your daughter have had a tough time all round. You did all the right things and given that your daughter is almost an adult (at 16) she knows how she feels so this scare merchant at the hospital could have been more sensitive to the needs of both you and your daughter. Do you have a name? Perhaps you could write and say how badly you feel in the way you were treated. Cold feet are not a sign of poor circulation in many cases. I'm glad you feel better in comming and telling us.
 
Hi Gillsb sorry to hear about your daughter,i have a nephew who has the exact same injury he did it last week as well as soft tissue damage he also did his ligaments in on the top of his foot and was in some pain, he and his mum left it for about 4 hours until he became in so much pain he could not walk, apparently they did the worse thing and that was to rest it up, you should never do that apparently as it can stiffen up the effected area...I hope your daughters foot clears up quickly, ((hugs)) x
 
Well Gill, given what you have said, the person was totally out of order and needs 'extra training' so they don't make anyone else feel as you did unnecessarily - I would complain. My feet are perfectly OK, but they can be like blocks of ice at times.
 
Hi Gillsb,

I think the nurse must have gone to the 'shock all diabetics with a gruesome story' school. How absolutely unprofessional of her. I would send a strongly worded letter of complaint and send copies to the Chief Executive of the hospital. I would have walked out after telling the nurse to update herself with the latest advances in diabetes, and pointing out to her that this generation of diabetics are less likely to be having amputations due to much better technology. I hope your daughter feels better soon and her foot recovers.🙂Bev
 
Hi Gill,
I'm so sorry to hear of the tuff time you and your daughter are having at the moment.
Fingers crossed things will improve soon.
As to that nurse 😱 Please write a letter of complaint regarding her comment's, ignorance like that is unaceptable. Point out in your letter the way it left your young daughter feeling as well. Hopefully the error of her ways will be pointed out to her and no one else will be left feeling like you and your daughter.
As to the way you delt with the injury. Top notch and full of common sense.
If I had had the injury, my Mum would have said stop moaning and go and do something usefull 🙄 (SRN).
 
Thank you all so much. I can't believe I let her get to me so much and the fact that I sat there without saying what I really thought. I was stunned at the time and although we are used to ignorance from some people I have never had it from a professional.

I have always encouraged Meg to deal with here and now as thats the best we can do to help the future - dwelling on the things that could happen doesn't help.

Thank you all for your support. A good rant does help!
 
Good luck to Gill's daughter with her GCSEs.
I don't have any children myself, yet am aware that GCSE exams start tomorrow and aware of pressures on families with children revising and sitting exams. Yesterday I organised a party for an 8 year old, whose older brother came along to help and run round park, as preparation for his exams - getting exercise and fresh air to ensure a good night's sleep.
So, I would complain on basis that frightening a young person is inappropriate at any time, but especially just before exams.
 
Love it! Certainly made us laugh about a horrible situation.
 
Hi Northerner,

That was a great poem - well done.🙂Bev
 
Gillsb said:
Had to write this just to get things off my chest.

Have not had the easiest 8 months with my daughter who is 16. Nasty case of glandular fever starting last September which seemed to go on and on for ever. Started with a pump in January and although we love it I am not going to pretend it has been easy. We seem to get everything under control and then her body changes again. I know its recovering from illness and hormones so we just try and get on with things.

Having missed half the school year, she actually starts her GCSE's today which will then be followed by her tonsils coming out in the holidays.

To cut a long story short, she hurt her foot on Saturday evening - not badly but having complained about it most of the day yesterday I decided to pop her down to our local Minor Injuries for them to put her mind at rest (and mine I guess). It wasn't a wound and bearing in mind she was putting weight on it I didn't expect anything to be wrong. I was only looking for some reassurance as she has become quite anxious over the past few months of illness.

After a very harsh lecture from the nurse about why had we left it all day, "she only has one pair of feet". "My friend is in hospital having his leg amputated at the moment". "You could be sat here next year with a false leg". "Your circulartion is bad enough anyway". "You might think it will never happen to you". "What are you going to do about these hypos ?" GET THE IDEA!

I left the hospital with the confirmation it is only as soft tissue injury but with a very upset daughter and to be honest I feel dreadful. We having been dealing with this condition since she was 12 and the past few months have been the hardest. Yes I wish we had perfect control - there are lots of things I wish.....but in the meantime we just do our best!

Rant over, sorry!
Click to expand...

Oh you poor things, what a horrible thing to happen to you. What an insensitive and rude nurse she was. I'm sure everyone would love their bs to be perfect all the time, but we are only human and not robots, that's why we have things like glucose tablets and glucogel if we are low and take a little bit more insulin if it is high!

Sounds as though she should give up her day job and do something more fitting to her personality, any idea's anyone ? Maybe a lighthouse Keeper in te Outer Hebredies 😛 Take care and try not to worry too much. Best wishes Sheena
 
She did manage to tell us that she is the mother of 3 young children herself. Lets hope none of them ever develop type 1 like many of our children did!
 
Well sadly, we've all met this "nurse" at some time in some shape form or situation, haven't we?

One of the Admin on another forum has a name for her -

Nursie Nightshade !!!
 
It has been some weeks but wanted to give you all an update.

My complaint has actually been dealt with very well. After sending my letter I have had various phone calls from the departments my complaint was gradually moving through.

The outcome:- Turns out she was a trainee nurse practitioner although I wasn't aware of that at the time. I think we can safely say she has been put back in her place. I am assured "she is now aware of her position and will never repeat the experience."She is very sorry and knows what is acceptable and what is not".

Lets hope so anyway.

On the positive side. Pumping is turning out to be great. HBA1C of 6.7 at clinc - the best we have had since diagnosis. Now thats not someone who doesn't look after her condition.
 
Thanks for the update 🙂 Very pleased to hear that the complaint has been handled well, although you would still think that someone training to be a nurse should not have it enter her head that saying such things was remotely acceptable! Let's hope the experience makes her a better nurse in all her future dealings with patients 🙂

Great news about the HbA1c and pumping! Keep up the good work! 🙂
 
It doesn't really matter if the person is a trainee or not - she still should not have spoken to you the way she did. Hopefully she will learn that she needs to improve her medical knowledge and inter-personal skills. It is good though that they are handling your complaint and you have been kept informed.

I am pleased that you are having so much success with the pump.
 
I glad to hear that you responded well with your complaint, a good out come on that one!

And Well done to both you and your daughter with her HbA1c fantastic result more so with having gone through exam's and al..

Glander Fever takes a lot longer than one realises to get over fully, when I had it I was very ill for 3 weeks, glands up, sore throat etc before it started to receed... But it was getting on for a year before it was completely flushed out the system..
 
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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.
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