Parent of newly diagnosed type 1 teenager

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Tina63 said:
No medical staff have ever talked to us about night time hypos. So do I gather if you have them but don't treat them your body will take over and right itself anyway? In the early weeks I could barely sleep wondering if I would go in and find him unconscious in the morning. He has had a couple of mornings (not recently) waking drenched in sweat. I couldn't explain that any time but his morning levels were ok then. This morning his whole room smelt like it did pre-diagnosis which would suggest being hyper to me, but I can never get a sensible reply if I ask what his morning levels are, I can only sneak a look at his monitor when he is in the shower. Knowing he was 9.8 last night (that is high for him) I imagine that was the cause of the smell.
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Hi Tina,

There have been many studies that suggest that unfortunately the liver does not always kick in when you are hypo. This has been done using sensors and shown that most do not wake when hypo. Before I used to test in the night I was also of the opinion that as long as the level was allright before going to bed then it would stay that way - but since testing I have found many hypo's and hyper's which can be caused by things like more exercise than usual or a particular food which has spiked or carb count gone wrong. General illness can also cause either high or low levels. Perhaps you could try testing one night per week to begin with and make a decision from there.🙂Bev
 
Regarding the night time hypo situation. I was always told in the beginning that my son would wake when hypo, but unfortunately that was not the case. I am not writing this to scare anyone, just to bring an awareness about it. My son has had 2 really bad hypos, both in the night, where he has actually fitted and one where he was asleep and I think we had just caught him before he fitted, he was jerking and not aware of anything. It is important that we try to put it into perspective ( I have been down the road of not being able to sleep with worry incase anything happens in the night, with bells on !). The only thing I try and do now, although my son is no longer a teenager, is make sure he always test before bed (all that nagging has paid off in some respects) and always has a snack to see him through , especially after hes been out and maybe had a drink. I still go in every morning , I dont care how old he is, and make sure hes ok and get him to test. Its alos peace or mind for me. It is unfair Tina, my son like yours is such a nice lad, and without the diabetes Im sure would have been a dream, The main source of conflict for us is and always was managing diabetes.
 
Hi Tina, welcome! I was diagnosed when I was 16 too and can understand how he is feeling. I went through a stage of denial hoping it would all go away, I also thought that when I had lots of hypos this was a good thing. When I started working after school and I felt low I would just ignore it as I thought it meant I could have more for dinner! I soon got fed up with the hypo symptoms and stopped doing this on my own - I'm not sure my parents even knew - I didn't like talking about it.

My parents were always very careful of what they fed me and I would just do as I was told because I didn't want to upset my Mum. I didn't eat any cake, chocolate, crisps etc until I went to uni.

When I then went to uni I think I rebelled against it a lot. I went out drinking and ate badly for the first year. I am now 23 and am really starting to realise how important it is to be more careful and motivate myself to eat well now that there is no one to nag me- it is a real battle for me! I have to admit that I do still get angry when my Mum tells me what to eat and what not to eat - sometimes she gets it wrong (a lot has changed in the 5 years since I left home) but most of the time I just don't like to admit that I am wrong.

Good luck with everything and I hope sometime soon he will want to join a forum or support group like this as it has made so much difference to me
 
Hi Carol.

TO give you some peace of mind, I used to fit sometimes when I didn't wake or catch it in time but haven't done so for years and always wake nowadays.

It may be something your brain has to get tuned into but I'm sure your son will find he wakes now and/or in the future. My parents used to insist I slept with my door ajar so they could hear me. It was awful at the time but I understood why and we're all friends still 🙂

They had terrible guilt about me developing diabetes (quite why I'm not entirely sure but they did and do) and this pushed much of their nagging behaviour but I'm sure all teens can understand why, even if they resent it and kick against it. If they don't understand, maybe a carefully worded letter to explain that they can digest in their own time would be justified.

Rob
 
Hi Tina!

Welcome to the forum. I'm 18 and was diagnosed with type 1 when I was 17. If your son ever want to vent about anything, I'm more than happy to give you my email address to pass on to him.

Hope everything is well!

Vicki 🙂
xxx
 
Well, Tina - let me start by saying a big "HI" and welcome to the forum 🙂

This has got to be the biggest "newbie" thread I've seen, since joining! You sound like you're being pushed to the limit of parental love by your son, at the mo :confused:

I was diagnosed at 18, just before A-levels, but consider myself very lucky (and my mum, consequently) in that I took it all very much in my stride; I s'pose it helped that I was scientific by nature, so diabetes was just like a new experiment to play with.
Having said that, I know that mum took the diagnosis far harder than I ever did and used to worry like mad about me - but then, that is what us parents do, innit? Difference is that I looked after myself - she was on the sidelines, left only to do the worrying! Things don't change, either - enquiries about my health and diabetes still open every conversation with her, nearly 30 years later. :D
I fully understand the point you made about him not testing for fear of the result; I spent much of my late 20's and 30's in a similar "testing phobia". Problem is, the diabetes won't go away, however much you rebel or show off and it will lead to complications in later life that were completely avoidable. I have some complications myself, albeit quite minor, but I wish I could turn back the clock and get a grip with myself.
It is a big mental hurdle to jump, but your son must learn to be ruthlessly honest with himself, regards testing (frequency as well as usefulness) and his general control - it is HE that will suffer if he doesn't.

On the one hand, as parents we have the benefit of having been a teenager ourselves and can think back fondly on how we behaved at that time; on the other, today's teenagers do exist in quite a different world from the one we lived in, bringing with it a new set of pressures. I can only wish you the best of luck in "helping" your son come to terms with it all.

Cheers,
Chris. :D
 
Thanks again everyone for your replies. It's good to hear from both parents and you young (and not so young) adults who have survived the parental nagging! The really good thing for me at the moment is to hear that there is hope for life beyond tomorrow. My son is on the brink of his GCSEs and was planning to go to college for his A levels. His confidence is now shattered and I think he will probably stay on at the school where he is at present. I am not sure in the long run that that is the right place for him academically, but of course his personal security and all feelings of familiarity are so important to him right now, so that's where I think he will remain. He was a few months ago talking of uni as part of his future, right now he can't even think about tomorrow. He was all for going to college in September, but now the thought of going and meeting a whole new bunch of people in a whole new environment has really unsettled him. He has lost all his self-confidence. I do fear he may just want to 'drop out' as he can't cope with anything else stressful in his life right now, but he does seem on the whole to be settling down a bit. He has just popped out on his bike to spend some time with his mates so I take that all as a good sign. Fingers crossed.
 
I wonder if mentioning a few role models might help ?

I can only think of Sir Steve Redgrave at the moment, but there is a long list somewhere if you google for it, including a few musicians. Just to illustrate that it doesnt stop people dead in their tracks and that it's not just the unlucky ones who develop it. Some of us are very special 🙂cool:🙄).

Does/did he have any or interests that he feels are now impossible ?

There are a couple of threads on here about what everyone does for a living, etc which covers a wide spectrum.

Rob
 
Hi there Tina, i'm 16 and on the exact same medication as your son.
i was diagnosed when i was 6 but i have a fair few experience with it so if he has any problems i would be more than welcome to speak to him i have facebook and msn if he would like a chat.
as for the testing before bed i must say i don't do that and for the snacking in the evening i also do the same and not give insulin most of the time but i'm trying to how do you say ween myself off the snacks.
must be really strange at his age to suddenly have this and i'm sure its all a bit hectic round yours at the moment.
i wish you all well, here if you need help 🙂
 
Robster65 said:
I wonder if mentioning a few role models might help ?

I can only think of Sir Steve Redgrave at the moment, but there is a long list somewhere if you google for it, including a few musicians. Just to illustrate that it doesnt stop people dead in their tracks and that it's not just the unlucky ones who develop it. Some of us are very special 🙂cool:🙄).

Does/did he have any or interests that he feels are now impossible ?

There are a couple of threads on here about what everyone does for a living, etc which covers a wide spectrum.

Rob
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Haha Rob!
If we heard the name Steve Redgrave mentioned a dozen times in the first 48hours of my son's diagnosis I wouldn't be lying! Everyone mentioned him! Actually, i have found it interesting that there seems dispute over whether he is type 1 or type 2. My understanding is that he is actually type 2 but chose to inject insulin so he could eat the massive carb meals needed to sustain him through his training and races - hey what do I know???
Sadly my son is a child of his time - a computer geek, never off the damn thing, so exercise is pretty alien to him. Saying that, with the better weather now he is venturing out a bit more during the evenings and weekends. He went out last night on his bike, but within 15 minutes had a hypo, his second of the day. He seems to go through spells of hypos, then his lantus gets dropped. He has been pretty stable for about 3 weeks since the last reduction in dose, now we have had 3 days in a row with hypos (not all after cycling I must add) so I suspect it may be lowered again at hospital next week. We will just have to wait and see. I am still learning so much, but feel I have a good grip on the general stuff now, we are going through correction doses on our next appointment.
We are going on a mini break over Easter, taking a mate, taking in a theme park, just to show him life really does go on as normal. Mind you, since we booked it I really do think he has settled down a lot. We managed to have a really nice chat about the dreaded D last night, I think entering the domain of his room, showing an interest in his computer was the right way to get me accepted, then he was very open to talking for once. Even on the way home from his first clinic appointment (4 weeks after diagnosis) we made a point of stopping for a meal out on the way home, just to show it's not a problem. He is cool with all that now, dealing fine with it.
Thanks as always for your input, it really is appreciated.
Tina
 
Hi Tina,

How does your son deal with exercise. I am just wondering about the bike riding - because we used to find this difficult to cope with in the early days - but soon realised that Alex needed a huge amount of 'free carbs' before setting off. Now, we just decrease his insulin on his pump to 50% to avoid hypo's.🙂Bev
 
Hi Tina, as a matter of interest, NOT relating to D, what computer games does your son go on. My son is still heavily into X box etc, and is quite well known on them. It has given him the opportunity to travel to USA, China, Germany etc and his Diabetes hasnt held him back.
 
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