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Need advice about diabetic partner

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J

Jemimapuddleduck

New Member
Hi - new here and wondered if anyone can help?
My partner of 2 years, age 46, has been diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes for the last 5 or so years.
I am very concerned that he is not looking after himself - he has not attended any GP or diabetic nurse appointments in all the time I've known him, he misses his retinal screenings and he never monitors his blood sugar levels. He takes his tablets religiously morning and evening but he has been on the same dose for at least 2 years and the GP continues to renew his repeat prescription without calling him in for a check up.
He is overweight, does not exercise, misses breakfast and occasionally lunch and always seems to be tired and moody. He frequently gets home from work after a long day and goes straight to bed without eating an evening meal, still taking his tablets.
I have spoken to his diabetic nurse who has written to him asking him to attend the clinic for a check up but he says he doesn't have time to go for the appointments as he is too busy at work.
I have tried talking to him but he accuses me of nagging and I end up bearing the brunt of his moodiness.
Has anyone else been in a similar situation? What helped?
Many thanks
 
Jemima hi and welcome,
i salute you for joining up and showing much concern for your hubby,something he seems to be lacking in, sounds to me like he is in denial about his diabetes even the busiest people on the planet would find sometime to fit appointment in etc etc, i mean come on also how long does it take to test blood sugar less then 20 seconds and he is taking his meds so he has time in the day for that.Maybe have a think about leaving this forum open for him to see,he must know this is driving you mad its not fair at the end of the day he is a grown man he needs to face this because one day all his negligence of his diabetes will catch up with him and then what.
 
Hello Jemima, welcome. Ultimately the only person who can take all the action required to stay healthy is your partner. All you can really do is continue to be supportive.

However, if you happen to be in charge of the food that gets eaten in the home, you will have a modicum of control over that. If you could do with shifting a few lbs yourself, you could try joining a weight loss group (I went with Slimming World myself). There, you can get access to low-calorie recipes that really are delicious, and your partner would face the choice of either eating healthily with you, or preparing meals for himself. Sneaky, but what the heck!
 
Hello Jemmima, it is great you want to support your partner.

the only person who can help him is himself. Let him know you are concerned and be supportive, but the only person who can keep the appoinments and do the testing is himself.

I am in the opposite position with meals as hubby is retired and does most of the cooking. It is a huge bone of contention that I don't want fried food all the time and I don't want fatty food all the time and I don't want potatos with every meal and I don't want chips with any meal. I am still working full time and there is no wehre near work I can get a healthy lunch-I don't want burgers or pizza all the time.
 
Hi Jemima,
I can't offer much advice but I do understand how you feel. It can be so frustrating to watch your partner refusing to follow a good health regime.
I am carer to my husband, although support would be a better description. I am the cook so I make sure he eats well and he does go to the doctor regularly, but try to get him to exercise is a nightmare.
He goes to golf usually once a week but has started to use a buggy!; comes back knackered and thinks that's enough. I nag at him and tell him he needs to exercise EVERY day but he always has some excuse as to why he can't do it today, he'll do extra tomorrow instead!!

We are both retired so meal times are easier than for you. When my husband comes home tired and grumpy I usually offer him something easy to eat like a sliced apple and cheese or a slice of wholemeal toast with sardines, marmite or peanut butter. This seems to revive him a bit.
I usually have a pot of soup on the go (except in the summer; if it ever arrives!!). A bowl of soup is easy to re-heat and light to eat.

Do you have a slow cooker? If not perhaps invest in one. That way you can prepare meals before going to work and have a meal ready for when you get in. Perhaps the aromas will temp your partner to eat and if he's tired and hungry when he gets home from work he won't have to wait.

Best Wishes
 
That probably why he tired because his bg is high. Going for a walk in the fresh air would do him a favour. The summer is hear. well done for being concerned & good luck sorting 🙂
 
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