Minor update…

[Amyfaith]

Hi everyone,

Been a tad too busy to post till recently but have definitely been lurking in the background. Sorry this is a bit long - just a lot to report.

I’m currently awaiting the results of an a1c done almost three weeks ago (took that long to get an appointment and no way of seeing the data otherwise!). My hopes are it’ll come back pretty good based on my finger prick tests. The estimate the app gives me is in the low 30s but I know it’s entirely possible I’m missing peaks/troughs and who knows what’s happening at night. I told the phlebotomist (who is also the diabetes nurse) that I’d take 50s, 40s would be good, but 30s is what the data says and she said most of the time even just finger pricks tend to be pretty predictive, so fingers crossed! I’m trying not to get too excited as I know how much margin or error there can be with spot testing, and if I go into my appointment assuming good things and hear less good news, it will be very tough to hear.

The data is largely encouraging - rarely above 7.5 after meals, usually in the 6s when I start out low 5s before eating, and that’s even the case with less carb-balanced meals. Some meals seem to do nothing at all to the numbers, so not sure if it’s a minimal rise and that’s the error margin looking like no rise, or if I rise earlier/later than the two hours. I’ve done a little bit of experimenting here, testing every half hour to see what the curve looks like, and it’s not super conclusive. My fasting sugars are sitting in the low 5s instead of the high 5s/low 6s now, sometimes even the upper 4s. Seems very dependant on when I test after waking up. I’m down 18% in terms of weight - nearly 23kg - which is *annoying* as wardrobe malfunctions are constant. I look in the mirror and don’t recognise myself, which is a bit odd. But outside the mental and emotional stuff, the data are good.

It’s not been an especially easy few months. Mental health has been dire (lots of internalised shame - and baking/going out for a small cake with a friend used to be stress relief so coping mechanisms are nil - and just generally extremely low mood on top of pre-existing depression), and my anxiety got so bad with one thing and another (lots of work shenanigans) I had really bad ectopic heartbeats for about two weeks. (ECG done, all is fine, and it’s calmed down now.) GP gave me a script for propranolol to take ‘in advance of anxiety’ but since I can’t exactly predict this (eg, emails come in whenever, bad news texts I won’t know about in advance, colleagues will be awful out of nowhere), there’s been no point in taking it. I already take an SSRI but GP was reticent to increase for some reason I couldn’t discern. So I think that needs attention. I do a lot of thinking I was fat and happy before, and I’m slimmer and healthier but about as far from happy as one can get now, and I wonder just how beneficial it’s really been, if that makes sense. The trade off might be physically good but mentally I’m a mess. (For anyone concerned, I already see a therapist, and she’s aware. We’re working on it.)

I also had an email from my surgery the other day going ‘we see you are recommended statins but not on them’, which is weird as back in Feb my GP and I spoke about it and said it wasn’t an immediate concern. Given that they have an old blood pressure and old weight (both *substantially* improved), I’m guessing my birthday last week just tipped me over in terms of the formula, but I’ll mention it when I see the GP on Tuesday and make sure he has my updated numbers. That or a cholesterol test is part of the a1c and it’s crazy high. But I would have thought if it was concerning they would have emailed me right away rather than waiting three weeks (they texted me the moment the a1c came back high in Jan). This of course sent me into a shame spiral, even though I know the likely reason is out of date information plus another year older…

So yes, a mixed picture. I’m hoping to spend a bit more time here over the summer while I’m less of a headless chicken!

 

[Amyfaith]

Also I forgot: I have been unimpressed with the lack of support from my surgery. I had to book my a1c myself (despite being told I would be prompted). I have still had no education course - no email, no letter, just a link to a website of some description that looks sketchy. I only had an appointment booked at an eye clinic back two weeks ago, which of course I’ve needed to reschedule about 5 times due to my scheduling. GP overall seems uninterested in providing much support, and when I’ve seen a different one than the one who made the diagnosis, they were very ‘so obviously you’ll need medication’, despite having no new data/etc. The nurse has been the most supportive, which is something, but the level of sheer *irritation* I feel from the GPs who’ve dealt with me is extremely off-putting. Like, one of them seemed angry. I’m probably overreading the ‘vibes’, as it were, but despite them saying the diagnosis is not my ‘fault’ it did seem like they were feeling the opposite. (They’re human, of course, but geez.) More fun for my overtaxed brain…

 

[Inka]

I wouldn’t worry about the statins text @Amyfaith They seem to be generated automatically. I had one this week even though I’ve told them I don’t want statins at this time. My cholesterol has actually gone down significantly so that wasn’t what triggered the text. They just seem to send them out regularly.

Diabetes is a condition where you have to be pro-active, I’ve found, and become your own expert. There’s lots of support here if you need it and Diabetes U.K. have information pages. Also, are you a member of DUK? You’ll probably find the Balance magazine helpful.

Have you tried Mindfulness and/or Tai Chi/Qigong? I find both extremely helpful for anxiety, stress and low mood.

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

Also I forgot: I have been unimpressed with the lack of support from my surgery. I had to book my a1c myself (despite being told I would be prompted). I have still had no education course - no email, no letter, just a link to a website of some description that looks sketchy. I only had an appointment booked at an eye clinic back two weeks ago, which of course I’ve needed to reschedule about 5 times due to my scheduling. GP overall seems uninterested in providing much support, and when I’ve seen a different one than the one who made the diagnosis, they were very ‘so obviously you’ll need medication’, despite having no new data/etc. The nurse has been the most supportive, which is something, but the level of sheer *irritation* I feel from the GPs who’ve dealt with me is extremely off-putting. Like, one of them seemed angry. I’m probably overreading the ‘vibes’, as it were, but despite them saying the diagnosis is not my ‘fault’ it did seem like they were feeling the opposite. (They’re human, of course, but geez.) More fun for my overtaxed brain…

Sorry to hear about the lack of support you have been offered @Amyfaith

And also some of the internal and external shame and stigma you have been experiencing. Diabetes is challenging enough to manage without some of those additional external pressures and negatives

I think some of the less than ideal experiences members here go through around their diagnosis and ongoing management seems to be connected to a lack of capacity (and time) to treat people as indoviduals.

There are most likely several diagnoses with T2 for any GP in a week, and quite a few of those individuals may just want to be given medication and more or less forget about it. Lots of GPs and nurses seem to develop an opinion over the years that people won’t really want to change their lifestyle, or make positive choices (and turn their diabetes around) in a way that many members here are motivated to do.

I’m not sure of that’s because the default advice is not ideal… whether it’s because most people lack the peer support and encouragement that the forum offers… or whether it’s because people who decide to engage with the forum are a self-selecting group of those who will want to make proactive changes to improve their health.

But just know that you aren’t alone in having these frustrations, and at the end of the day what’s important is what you decide to do. You didn’t set out to give yourself T2D, and there are many complex factors that were part of the build-up to this point (only a handful of which you could control or influence). What matters now is learning to live well with your diabetes. Managing it with sustainable long-term strategies, and keeping it in its box so that you can still enjoy life around it.

So still meet your friend for a cuppa and a catch-up in the coffee shop (as I will be doing tomorrow), just skip having the cake 🙂

 

[rebrascora]

Many, many congratulations on the fabulous weight loss you have achieved and the finger prick results you are getting all suggest that you have made really great progress and you should be incredibly proud of yourself because you have achieved this despite the poor support you have had.
I too had negative feelings of guilt and shame at diagnosis but I used them to help me do something positive and change my diet and lifestyle and be more healthy and they are behind me now, but without them I am not sure I would have managed to change, so I can look back and see them in a positive light. In some respects they were useful feelings because I used them to make changes rather than just beat myself up.
As regards social outings, I still have a treat when I meet up with a friend for coffee but is is a coffee with real double cream rather than a coffee with sugar and a cake or scone as I would previously have had. I have found low carb options for eating out too although I rarely eat out and very occasionally I will decide to have something a bit higher carb as a real treat because doing that once in a blue moon is OK too. Diabetes is about finding balance in all things and it is a work in progress finding a sustainable balance. I am slowly learning that it is OK to have a little higher carb treat occasionally. Most of my regular treats are low carb and I find it is really important to have those readily available, but once in a while I will have something a bit off piste. I keep the portion small and the occasion rare and special. Sometimes I end up disappointed as it no longer seems as enjoyable as I once thought it was and other times I really do enjoy it. I think for me, being in the moment with that treat is important, rather than just having it to be sociable and because everyone else is having it or because it looks really nice. I now try to stop and think, will I actually really enjoy that and is it worth the BG turbulence it will cause or is there something else that I can have which I will enjoy but will cause less mayhem to my system.

Wishing you lots of luck with your HbA1c result. 3 weeks is a ridiculously long time to wait. Mine are usually back within 2 days. I can understand you not wanting to set yourself up for disappointment, but I look forward to seeing your update with optimism.

 

[Amyfaith]

I wouldn’t worry about the statins text @Amyfaith They seem to be generated automatically. I had one this week even though I’ve told them I don’t want statins at this time. My cholesterol has actually gone down significantly so that wasn’t what triggered the text. They just seem to send them out regularly.

Diabetes is a condition where you have to be pro-active, I’ve found, and become your own expert. There’s lots of support here if you need it and Diabetes U.K. have information pages. Also, are you a member of DUK? You’ll probably find the Balance magazine helpful.

Have you tried Mindfulness and/or Tai Chi/Qigong? I find both extremely helpful for anxiety, stress and low mood.

Ah, that's good to know. I'd done some rooting around online and it reads like while the NHS does not automatically put diabetics on statins (like in the US), it's recommended. So I'm guessing it just happened to be last week - just a bit galling to see the day after my birthday! (Also seriously need to switch the email they send this stuff to. Kind of getting tired of the medical anxiety when I open my work email...)

And yes - definitely the pro-active thing. I've got one zebra-type condition already, which I had to basically do the research for myself because it's so rare, so at least I'm used to this! I'm not a DUK member - wondering what sort of stuff is in the magazine?

Mindfulness tends to work 50/50 with me. I'm often too in my head already and CBT style stuff can make things worse, but it's situation specific, so it might be worth thinking about trying it with this diagnosis. Thanks for the suggestions!

 

[Amyfaith]

Sorry to hear about the lack of support you have been offered @Amyfaith

And also some of the internal and external shame and stigma you have been experiencing. Diabetes is challenging enough to manage without some of those additional external pressures and negatives

I think some of the less than ideal experiences members here go through around their diagnosis and ongoing management seems to be connected to a lack of capacity (and time) to treat people as indoviduals.

There are most likely several diagnoses with T2 for any GP in a week, and quite a few of those individuals may just want to be given medication and more or less forget about it. Lots of GPs and nurses seem to develop an opinion over the years that people won’t really want to change their lifestyle, or make positive choices (and turn their diabetes around) in a way that many members here are motivated to do.

I’m not sure of that’s because the default advice is not ideal… whether it’s because most people lack the peer support and encouragement that the forum offers… or whether it’s because people who decide to engage with the forum are a self-selecting group of those who will want to make proactive changes to improve their health.

But just know that you aren’t alone in having these frustrations, and at the end of the day what’s important is what you decide to do. You didn’t set out to give yourself T2D, and there are many complex factors that were part of the build-up to this point (only a handful of which you could control or influence). What matters now is learning to live well with your diabetes. Managing it with sustainable long-term strategies, and keeping it in its box so that you can still enjoy life around it.

So still meet your friend for a cuppa and a catch-up in the coffee shop (as I will be doing tomorrow), just skip having the cake 🙂

Thanks so much for all of this - it is really good to hear all of it. I grew up in the 80s/90s in the US, where diabetes, particularly T2, was really only known through Wilfred Brimley's ads and his odd pronunciation of the word. Add the internalised fatphobia, despite years of body acceptance work, and there's a lot of toxicity there.

And yes, I'm really cognisant that the NHS and individual physicians are overburdened and very used to people not being interested in their health (and to be fair to the one who did the diagnosis, I went in all weight-inclusive and body-positivity guns blazing and might have sworn when the GP suggested extreme low calorie stuff, which would suggest, incorrectly, that I think I know better than an MD...). Luckily all the internalised shame doesn't stop me from doing the right things - it just makes me really super depressed when I think about it, particularly when reflecting on what it has cost me emotionally and mentally. At least the crying jags have let up by this point, more or less, and I think I'm broadly doing better, but there are still some very dark moments. But again, none of it stops me from doing my best with the tools I have, which is lucky. Someone else might have gone 'eff this' given the treatment I've had, but I'm stubborn with a self-protection streak a mile wide so I find it very difficult to do something that I'm aware is harmful to myself.

I'm doing my best to do sustainable things - more of the replacements/additions than just 'cannot have' list. I'm pulling from some of the low-carb community recipes so I can still bake occasionally if I have an itch only some sort of cookie/cracker/etc might scratch. And I've realised if I have like a single Lindt truffle (sometimes 2!) after dinner, particularly if I've done something a bit lower carb than usual or unusually high in fibre (beans! so many beans!), that doesn't do a whole lot (if anything) and generally that's all I want anyway. Having testing equipment has been a game changer, and I can probably tolerate a whole lot more than I allow myself, which probably includes a proper latte while out.

 

[Inka]

I'm not a DUK member - wondering what sort of stuff is in the magazine?

There’s a variety of stuff in the Balance mag: readers letters, medical queries, personal stories from people with diabetes, research news, articles about exercise and/or diet, recipes, etc. I look forward to my magazine.

 

[Amyfaith]

Many, many congratulations on the fabulous weight loss you have achieved and the finger prick results you are getting all suggest that you have made really great progress and you should be incredibly proud of yourself because you have achieved this despite the poor support you have had.
I too had negative feelings of guilt and shame at diagnosis but I used them to help me do something positive and change my diet and lifestyle and be more healthy and they are behind me now, but without them I am not sure I would have managed to change, so I can look back and see them in a positive light. In some respects they were useful feelings because I used them to make changes rather than just beat myself up.
As regards social outings, I still have a treat when I meet up with a friend for coffee but is is a coffee with real double cream rather than a coffee with sugar and a cake or scone as I would previously have had. I have found low carb options for eating out too although I rarely eat out and very occasionally I will decide to have something a bit higher carb as a real treat because doing that once in a blue moon is OK too. Diabetes is about finding balance in all things and it is a work in progress finding a sustainable balance. I am slowly learning that it is OK to have a little higher carb treat occasionally. Most of my regular treats are low carb and I find it is really important to have those readily available, but once in a while I will have something a bit off piste. I keep the portion small and the occasion rare and special. Sometimes I end up disappointed as it no longer seems as enjoyable as I once thought it was and other times I really do enjoy it. I think for me, being in the moment with that treat is important, rather than just having it to be sociable and because everyone else is having it or because it looks really nice. I now try to stop and think, will I actually really enjoy that and is it worth the BG turbulence it will cause or is there something else that I can have which I will enjoy but will cause less mayhem to my system.

Wishing you lots of luck with your HbA1c result. 3 weeks is a ridiculously long time to wait. Mine are usually back within 2 days. I can understand you not wanting to set yourself up for disappointment, but I look forward to seeing your update with optimism.

Thanks so much for this - it's super helpful. I did treat myself a bit more last week as I was on holiday, and because of all the extra walking I was doing, it didn't seem to make too much of an impact on my glucose readings (but I am finding towards the end of battery life my readings can seem odd, which was the case last week). I also am starting to do a good line in a single bite of someone else's dessert (pre-agreed, and they're aware of my diagnosis, of course), which honestly is usually enough. I'm finding I can incorporate a reasonable portion of most things as long as it's with/shortly after a dinner with a solid amount of protein and a decent serving of fibre. I have realised I can generally pair even a little packet of crisps or a normal serving of popcorn with certain meals (or as part of a train snack - finding low carb stuff in stations is a nightmare, but cheese+berries+pop chips works fine, especially if I have to make a mad dash for a connection!). I'm tempted to start experimenting with mash, see how much I can do at once. I don't miss pasta, or rice, really, but potato has to happen sometimes.

For the HbA1c the result was back in about a day, but getting an appointment to actually speak to a doctor so they'd tell me what it was is what's taken so long. I'm going to see if I can get them to sort out a way of just giving me these results quickly so I don't sit there and worry for three weeks next time...

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

I'm tempted to start experimenting with mash, see how much I can do at once. I don't miss pasta, or rice, really, but potato has to happen sometimes.

We have low-carbers here who swear by swede, cauli, and celeriac mashes (celeriac mash is an ever-more-frequent Masterchef staple I notice).

Some go all-in, others have a mix of potato and ‘other’ which stretches the potato and (several members suggest) actually makes a tastier and more interesting mash, that also happens to be lower carb. Win!

 

[Amyfaith]

We have low-carbers here who swear by swede, cauli, and celeriac mashes (celeriac mash is an ever-more-frequent Masterchef staple I notice).

Some go all-in, others have a mix of potato and ‘other’ which stretches the potato and (several members suggest) actually makes a tastier and more interesting mash, that also happens to be lower carb. Win!

Weirdly, I’ve just had some celariac chips with dinner tonight! (They’re *okay*… I need to find a better recipe that leaves them a little less chewy, I think. Maybe par-boil and then roast.) I find courgette chips work best for me in a rush. I usually do cauli mash and keep it on hand, which I do like a lot, and made it even pre-diagnosis. But I do miss the mouth feel of potato, and the way it handles sauces/etc. Might see what a mixture does to blood sugars. Being a diabetic foodie is rough.

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

I think @Martin.A might be a bit of a celeriac-chip guru?

Being a diabetic foodie is rough.

I guess it’s a bit like trying to make successful vegan dishes - some extra creativity and some lateral thinking, and enjoying the differences rather than trying to slavishly recreate / replicate something else?

 

[Drummer]

Boiled swede, mashed, left overnight then a couple of eggs beaten in, fried with bacon or baked with some cheese mixed in and cheese on top - who needs potatoes?

 

[Leadinglights]

I think @Martin.A might be a bit of a celeriac-chip guru?

I guess it’s a bit like trying to make successful vegan dishes - some extra creativity and some lateral thinking, and enjoying the differences rather than trying to slavishly recreate / replicate something else?

I made a tofu stir fry tonight, not a huge success too bland, needs work and a better recipe.

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

I made a tofu stir fry tonight, not a huge success too bland, needs work and a better recipe.

Tofu is just a flavour carrier. It doesn’t really have any taste if it’s own, but it is great at absorbing flavour from elsewhere and delivering it.

Marinated crispy tofu is partcularly good at this time of year! It perks up any salad stuff you put with it.

 

[Martin.A]

I think @Martin.A might be a bit of a celeriac-chip guru?

Would love to be but I still haven't worked out how to get them spot on. This is the recipe I try and follow, but without the curry powder. I just use ground black pepper.

Celeriac oven chips

Give oven chips a new twist - with a helping of celeriac

www.bbcgoodfood.com

 

[Amyfaith]

Would love to be but I still haven't worked out how to get them spot on. This is the recipe I try and follow, but without the curry powder. I just use ground black pepper.

Celeriac oven chips

Give oven chips a new twist - with a helping of celeriac

www.bbcgoodfood.com

Oh that’s brilliant. The one I was using was 15 mins (!) and no par-boiling. It worked and they were edible but chips they were not. The recipe suggested smoked paprika, which I did use, and that was a good choice in flavour, if looking for something different. Thought my bottle of southern chicken seasoning also might be good (works nicely on roast courgettes too).

 

[Amyfaith]

I think @Martin.A might be a bit of a celeriac-chip guru?



I guess it’s a bit like trying to make successful vegan dishes - some extra creativity and some lateral thinking, and enjoying the differences rather than trying to slavishly recreate / replicate something else?

Oh definitely - I’m pretty wide ranging in my tastes, though have some allergies that make me a little limited (so many diabetes friendly recipes are fish-based! Why?!), so I’m happy to experiment and love playing with flavours and ideas, but a lot is down to prep time, especially during term time.

 

[Lucyr]

GP gave me a script for propranolol to take ‘in advance of anxiety’ but since I can’t exactly predict this (eg, emails come in whenever, bad news texts I won’t know about in advance, colleagues will be awful out of nowhere), there’s been no point in taking it.

Propanalol works pretty quickly, I take 40mg 3 times a day. You could just take it when you are anxious and it will calm it down.

 

[Amyfaith]

Tofu is just a flavour carrier. It doesn’t really have any taste if it’s own, but it is great at absorbing flavour from elsewhere and delivering it.

Marinated crispy tofu is partcularly good at this time of year! It perks up any salad stuff you put with it.

View attachment 30813

I neeeed to perfect my tofu cooking, particularly getting it crispy.