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Loneliness is a terrible problem for me

Leadinglights said:
Is there any opportunity for volunteering in your area, for example helping in a charity shop, litter picking, local hospital friends.
I think I mentioned before that churches are in need of people to learn bellringing, bell ringers are a friendly group of people. St John Cardiff have an active band of ringers I believe but there are others, I'm not sure where you live.
You don't need to be religious to learn or even be musical.
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I think I want to be around people who want to be social rather than for something to fill my time if that makes any sense ?

I could volunteer in a hospital but apart from a few people in say the patient liason office ...I would only be interacting with patients .....and you don't tend to make social connections with people in those situations

I think friendship and social groups would be what would suit me

I appreciate your advice LL
 
Barrowman said:
Just a thought @Taffyboyslim have you considered a pet? A past friend of mine got a dog and it changed his life around so quickly that it was remarkable.

The unconditional love and constant presence of a pet can help combat feelings of isolation. Dogs provide a reason to get up in the morning, a routine to follow, and a source of comfort during quiet moments.

Having a pet also encourages social interaction. Walking a dog often leads to conversations with neighbours or other dog owners, fostering a sense of connection with the community. Plus, the physical activity involved in caring for a dog—walking, playing, feeding—can be beneficial for both mental and physical health.

There’s something deeply reassuring about having another living being rely on you and offer companionship in return. Even something as simple as a wagging tail or a warm snuggle can brighten someone's day.... I wish you good luck in whatever path you choose.
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Thank you

I think in ten years time I will definitely be going to the local dogs home for a companion
 
Have you tried joining a fishing club? After moving from Essex to Lincolnshire a few years ago I joined a local fishing club and have made many new friends, both fellow anglers and people out walking, people just love a good natter! good luck!
 
agentmole said:
Have you tried joining a fishing club? After moving from Essex to Lincolnshire a few years ago I joined a local fishing club and have made many new friends, both fellow anglers and people out walking, people just love a good natter! good luck!
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Yes I am in a fishing club

Thanks
 
Taffyboyslim said:
A history of depression and anxiety and the social isolation that brings , many years of caring for my parents through dementia with no family support and now a diagnosis of type 2 just seems to weigh me down

How come some people seem to flit around like social butterflies ? I have plenty of time on my hands but just feel so isolated

Another bank holiday upon us and I the only contact will likely have is someone serving me in the local supermarket

It's so hard breaking out of this .....I am not at risk to myself but it's thoroughly depressing
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Morning and do hope you can manage to get out and about and meet some new people.
Have always had jobs which involve a lot of social contact and felt comfortable in social settings so lucky never to have suffer from anxiety etc but recognise it is easy to appear comfortable to others who maybe struggle in those situations.
Think the suggestions of others of joining walking groups etc is really useful but what I would say is be your natural self and not try too hard to befriend people and the social contact will improve.
You sound a really nice caring person and am sure a real,pleasure to converse with but I often find the important bit is to try and be comfortable with yourself and that will help build confidence in yourself in these social situations.
That is key to me in overcoming the natural fear of meeting people and also in building a resilience to protect our feelings if we come across challenges which somehow appear negative.
I do appreciate how difficult it is for those who suffer from depression and anxiety to gain this inner confidence and this forum can really support people in this situation.
We can be annonymous on here if we choose and that can help in these situations but try and be brave and try sone new things that out you in contact with people but above all don’t try to hard and be yourself and am sure that others will respond back to you and that hopefully will help.
Very best wishes for the w/ end and beyond.
 
Wendal said:
Morning and do hope you can manage to get out and about and meet some new people.
Have always had jobs which involve a lot of social contact and felt comfortable in social settings so lucky never to have suffer from anxiety etc but recognise it is easy to appear comfortable to others who maybe struggle in those situations.
Think the suggestions of others of joining walking groups etc is really useful but what I would say is be your natural self and not try too hard to befriend people and the social contact will improve.
You sound a really nice caring person and am sure a real,pleasure to converse with but I often find the important bit is to try and be comfortable with yourself and that will help build confidence in yourself in these social situations.
That is key to me in overcoming the natural fear of meeting people and also in building a resilience to protect our feelings if we come across challenges which somehow appear negative.
I do appreciate how difficult it is for those who suffer from depression and anxiety to gain this inner confidence and this forum can really support people in this situation.
We can be annonymous on here if we choose and that can help in these situations but try and be brave and try sone new things that out you in contact with people but above all don’t try to hard and be yourself and am sure that others will respond back to you and that hopefully will help.
Very best wishes for the w/ end and beyond.
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That's another very kind and helpful post

I am very grateful

I think the key is putting myself in places where other people want conversation and social contact

Kind Regards
 
Refer yourself through the NHS for Social Prescribing. The link workers will link you in with groups and activities that go on in your local area, they will also hand hold if you need someone to go with for a short while until you feel confident to go alone.
I am a Social Prescriber in Lincolnshire and support people in this way. It's all about what is important to you.
 
Hi @Taffyboyslim you have had some good ideas, but let me throw another one at you, which may suit.

Many animal charities are desperate for foster parents especially for dogs, as a foster parent, you care for a dog until it finds a new permanent home, so it's not a long term commitment, but a very valuable one, you may have the dog for 2 months or longer until it gets rehomed.

We have two dogs and the people we meet on walks is unbelievable, many have become good friends and when I say good friends, they are people that come round to our house for meals or just a cup of coffee and a piece of cake in the afternoon.
Dog owners are very sociable and caring people and many are single people who only have their dog for company

Why I say fostering a dog, is because it's not long term and the love a dog will give you is unbelievable, many have just been abandoned or abused, so need the love of a caring person until a new home is found for them.

If by any chance you went down the route of fostering a dog, the charity will pay or should pay the costs of dog food etc so you wont be out of pocket.

To give a dog a second chance of a good life is so rewarding, we rescued a dog from a charity and to watch her grow from a shy, scared little thing into a confident happy dog will make you cry at times.

Food for thought maybe ??

Alan
 
Really good post Alan and people sometimes forget how pets can just help people through their difficulties.
I don’t mean in replacement of human contact though my wife often says she prefers dogs to people.
However they are non judgemental and take you for who you are and will reciprocate any love and care many times over.
 
janeyj said:
Refer yourself through the NHS for Social Prescribing. The link workers will link you in with groups and activities that go on in your local area, they will also hand hold if you need someone to go with for a short while until you feel confident to go alone.
I am a Social Prescriber in Lincolnshire and support people in this way. It's all about what is important to you.
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My local mind does this I think ?
 
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