Just joined...supporting a partner

[Partner33]

Evening all...I have been dating a partner with Type 1 for 3 years...love all that he is..he's finding it hard to fully let me in...how can I reassure I am.here to support him all the way

 

[Inka]

I think some people can be very protective of their diabetes, partly through privacy, partly because they think people won’t understand or will criticise. If I were you, I’d simply ask him how I could support him. I’d also make sure he knew that I understood how much work Type 1 is and that I thought he was doing a great job.

 

[Leadinglights]

Evening all...I have been dating a partner with Type 1 for 3 years...love all that he is..he's finding it hard to fully let me in...how can I reassure I am.here to support him all the way

Welcome to the forum. There are quite a few people who join because they want to support someone else be that a partner, child or now adult off spring and find it challenging to know how much to get involved.
I expect your partner has been used to managing his condition and coping with the ups and downs of something which can be very erratic at times.
Educating yourself about the condition would be a first step and the Learning zone may help you with that. It is important to know when and if your intervention may be needed and what to do so as not to do the wrong thing.
Depending on how people manage their condition it can be a very individual thing.
Do you know what insulin regime he is on and does he have a Libre or other device for monitoring his blood glucose levels.
If he manages his diabetes well then he may feel he doesn't need to involve you but don't let that put you off letting him know that you are there to support but not take over which maybe his fear.

 

[Partner33]

Thanks for the reply he has a libre and manages it all very well...i am so very proud of him. He was diagnosed age 8 and when he opens up is still very angry...he feels like a burden and I think he is trying to protect me....I have taken courses and bought books to try to understand.

 

[Partner33]

I think some people can be very protective of their diabetes, partly through privacy, partly because they think people won’t understand or will criticise. If I were you, I’d simply ask him how I could support him. I’d also make sure he knew that I understood how much work Type 1 is and that I thought he was doing a great job.

Thanks for the reply...I have taken courses..bought books Type Awsome for him...because he is...he does an amazing job everyday,

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

Welcome to the forum @Partner33

A diagnosis with diabetes is sometimes likened to a form of grieving (for lost health, lost opportunities, for the person you used to be and could have been). And just like other forms of grief it can give rise to strong emotional responses which do not necessarily neatly fade over time or occur in any kind of tidy sequence. These emotions can also recur and re-emerge at any point. Anger, denial, bargaining, depression and acceptance can all swirl, alternate and overwhelm the logical part of your brain.

Some days it can be fine… but other days (or for some people longer periods) it can be a major mental health challenge.

Which can lead some to develop coping strategies to keep these emotions buttoned down. T1 can also be fickle, frustrating and quite isolating - which may explain why you feel you are being kept slightly at a distance from his experience of it.

It rarely shows us in our best light!

This ‘diabetes etiquette’ card might gove some ideas about n
how to have positive conversations, and some things to avoid?

http://behavioraldiabetes.org/xwp/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/BDIAdultEtiquetteCard.pdf