Hiding diabetes

[nonethewiser]

Toilet to inject, never ever such dirty filthy places used by many who never wash their hands after using facilities.

 

[CliffH]

Until I joined this forum about 12 years back I'd never spoken or written about diabetes. I couldn't say the word out loud and still struggle today.

When I was diagnosed as a young girl in 1978 my parents reacted badly to my diagnosis. My paternal Grandma was diagnosed with Type 1 in the 1920s not many years after insulin was discovered and sadly died young with complications. I've written before that I was told not to tell anyone I had diabetes and I never spoke to my late Dad about it and I barely spoke to my Mum about it either. It was pre internet and I didn't know anyone else with T1 or realise others were struggling as much as me. As soon as I was old enough I went to clinics on my own and once I left home I started skipping clinics and descended into a spiral of eating disorders and complications.

I met up with two school friends a few weeks back after 40 years! I had to explain my leg was in a cast and I couldn't drive due to sight loss so they kindly came to my house. We chatted about all that had happened over the years and friends we'd kept in touch with and then they asked about my leg and sight loss. I talked about being diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes in 1978 and how much I'd struggled with it all over the years. They were in the same class as me for 6 years of school and sixth form, we used to go out to parties and events together & they had no idea I had Type 1. It hit me then how much & how well I'd covered up and hidden away my diagnosis- it was easier back then pre blood glucose testing and MDI but was so risky not to tell anyone.

It shocked me how much and for how long I'd hidden things, how much it affected me mentally and physically and prevented me from seeking help when things started to go very wrong. Reading posts on this forum asking for advice and the help & reassurances given acknowledging what a tough relentless thing diabetes is has helped me so much to start to unravel the problems I couldn't speak about for decades. Thank you everyone 🙂

 

[Flower]

So after meeting up with school friends after 40 years and them not having a clue I'd been diagnosed with T1 at school I joined the ex/old pupils site for my senior school. I was having a read through of past posts and came across one by the other Type 1 in the school at the time. They had written about having to go out of lessons at 10.30 and 2.30 to eat 2 biscuits at the school nurses office in the days of one injection per day & no glucose testing when you had to feed insulin at the right time to prevent hypos. I had completely forgotten about doing this -they wouldn't let us eat in the classroom - after a couple of days I refused to leave class and ran to the nurses office between lessons- I probably used any glucose up legging it up and down 3 floors as fast as I could!
They had then written about another girl a few years younger who was diagnosed and refused to tell anyone or talk about it - Hello !- so my keep it hidden, don't let anyone else know wasn't quite as successful as I thought. I am tempted to write back and say hello 🙂