Going back to work

[rosy_nic]

Hi everyone,

I'm having a few problems at the moment, I feel pressured by my parents to go back to work after having nearly 6 weeks off from work to get used to this whole diabetes stuff. Their main goal it seems is to get me earning some money to be come more independent, I don't believe that money solves all life's problems, I'm not that keen to go back to work as I don't like the job - it's till work and stacking selves in a discount retailer, my manager has been nice enough to let me have time off, but I'm getting fed up of my pushy parents that all they think about is money are selfish, not what i want and my health. I do suffer from anxiety and mild autism as well, so this does not help when they become pushy.

Any advice would be welcomed

 

[DeusXM]

This isn't what you want to hear, but I would say getting back to work and back to normal is exactly the right thing to do.

It's not about money. It's about living your life with a medical condition and not letting it hold you back. If you don't like the job, then fine, but I would really recommend that you then find another job that you will enjoy more.

Money won't solve all life's problems - but it can help solve some of them, and I would also say that getting back into work and feeling like you have a purpose can help stave off the feelings of depression and helplessness that many people feel after diagnosis. Far better to be at work among other people and being productive than being sat at home with nothing to do but get lost in your thoughts.

 

[Adrasteia]

Money doesn't solve all problems, but not having any sure as hell creates a lot!

You have to be honest here - are you unwilling to go back because you feel your ability to manage your diabetes is compromised or because you just don't like the job? If it is the former, then speak to your parents/consultants/DSN about getting extra support, speak to your manager about making accommodations - s/he sounds pretty understanding given the time off you've had. There is help out there in terms of managing your diabetes and transitioning back into work if you need it.

If it is the latter, then your parents have been more than fair with 6 weeks! Most of us don't have the luxury of a job we love, but we go in anyway. Look for something better by all means, and again speak to your parents, they'll appreciate the honesty and may have some ideas to help. But if this is what is really holding you back, don't use your health as an excuse - you may pidgeonhole yourself and your abilities in a way that is difficult to distance yourself from in the future.

 

[trophywench]

Rosy - you DO need time to get over it a bit - and everyone's different in how much time they might need - I was off 2 months! - only because my eyes wouldn't focus, actually I was bored as hell (couldn't read, watch telly, not that there was any daytime TV then anyway, knit, sew .... Aaargghh !) and more than ready to get back.

Are your parents really being selfish - or do they believe it's better for YOU to try and get out a bit more and have more structure in your life than recently? - and can they actually afford to keep you ad infinitum whilst you are not able to contribute any money towards your expenses? Have they perchance come to rely on some money for you towards Household expenses - and none of them are cheap I assure you and it DOES definitely cost more to have an extra person in the house.

Plus of course - YOU have personal expenses.

You obviously work for quite nice people, anyway - really the only way of saying 'thank you' to them is to return, isn't it? And - when I've wanted to change jobs - I have actually always found it easier to do so whilst actually IN a job - whereas if you go for an interview and they ask what you're doing now and you say 'Oh I've had to have time off cos I've only just been diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes' then it's perfectly possible for them to think 'Oooh, don't want her - she'll be off sick more than she's here!' and tell you they've decided on Joe Bloggs instead.

I'm not saying now is the right time to go back for you - or that it's the right job - but just trying to present someone else's possible points of view, is all.

 

[Pumper_Sue]

Who's paying for your food and keep Rosie? Work is good for you it will help with your control as well as give you an income to pay your way. If you don't like the job then look for another job whilst working as it gives a better impression of you when applying for a new job.
I suspect you are worried and thinking things like "what if I hypo". It called fear of the unknown so you need to bite the bullet and make the first move. Ask that you have a phased return make sure you have plenty of hypo treatment with you and best of all you will be fine.

 

[Mini-Vicki]

Hey Rosie,
I can totally understand that you might feel anxious about going back to work, but it would be a good thing to do, then you can start fitting diabetes into your life, rather than your life revolving around your diabetes!
I wasn't fortunate enough to have a nice boss when I was diagnosed, I had to go back to work the day after I was started on insulin! I keep hypo treatments near by, or in my pocket at all times, and my glucometer is fairly nearby as well.
As others have suggested, ask for a slow phase in at work until you can get used to how working affects your BGs. My job is extremely active, so if I have a lazy weekend, I definitely notice a difference in my BGs.
It sounds as if you're unhappy in your job, so when you've got back into the swing of things, start looking for something you will enjoy. Diabetes itself doesn't stop any of us doing what we want - to a point - we can't be fighter pilots! Love or loathe her, the new PM is a type 1, that's inspiring to me!

 

[Martin Canty]

keep hypo treatments near by,

I don't know what the dress code is but cargo pants are great for storing things like emergency supplies & meter...

 

[Copepod]

One shift at a time. A couple of boiled sweets or a packet of polos hardly show in a pocket, so, if you can't carry a meter, then if you feel hypo, eat sweet(s). If you can test, then do so. Once you've proved to yourself that you can do a familiar job, it will be easier to convince a new employer to take you on. Good luck.

 

[Ralph-YK]

You have my sympathies Rose. Parents can be a pain. Do you live with your parents?

There is help out there in terms of managing your diabetes and transitioning back into work if you need it.

Very difficult to find. Certainly not from health care professionals in my area.

 

[rosy_nic]

You have my sympathies Rose. Parents can be a pain. Do you live with your parents?

Very difficult to find. Certainly not from health care professionals in my area.

Thank you 🙂 I don't live at home any more, but my parents half own of my flat were I live so they have a say in what goes on, what I have (things I buy for example Clothes, DVD's etc) so it would nice for a change for them to watch at a distance, and let me be as I'm nearly 30!

 

[rosy_nic]

One shift at a time. A couple of boiled sweets or a packet of polos hardly show in a pocket, so, if you can't carry a meter, then if you feel hypo, eat sweet(s). If you can test, then do so. Once you've proved to yourself that you can do a familiar job, it will be easier to convince a new employer to take you on. Good luck.

Thank you, that is what I talked to my manager over the phone about doing 1 shift a week then increase it to see how I get on, I will hopefully be allowed to carry sweets/dextrose in my pockets as there are rules about eating food (I work in a shop, were staff are not allowed to eat food on the shop floor, but I might have exception!!) Yes once I get familiar with working again then it will be easier to move when I feel confident to

 

[rosy_nic]

I don't know what the dress code is but cargo pants are great for storing things like emergency supplies & meter...

We are not allowed to eat on the shop floor, but I might have exception encase I have a hypo, we are supposed to wear black smart trousers, but I have ones with pockets in so it might not be so much of an issue

 

[rosy_nic]

This isn't what you want to hear, but I would say getting back to work and back to normal is exactly the right thing to do.

It's not about money. It's about living your life with a medical condition and not letting it hold you back. If you don't like the job, then fine, but I would really recommend that you then find another job that you will enjoy more.

Money won't solve all life's problems - but it can help solve some of them, and I would also say that getting back into work and feeling like you have a purpose can help stave off the feelings of depression and helplessness that many people feel after diagnosis. Far better to be at work among other people and being productive than being sat at home with nothing to do but get lost in your thoughts.

I do understand that it was not I wanted to hear, but your right going back to normal (well some sort of normal for me!) is probably better than sitting around watching TV boxsets.

I do think that the condition is holding me back in lots of ways esp. with the food stuff, even though I changed to a flexible insulin regime I still can't have snacks that I used to, with out thinking do I need to take extra insulin for that, but that is another matter! I was made to apply for the job at the job centre after been made redundant in February, I keep looking for new jobs all the time.

Your right money does not solve all life's problems, but it might help me get rid of the depression and anxiety I have

 

[rosy_nic]

Money doesn't solve all problems, but not having any sure as hell creates a lot!

You have to be honest here - are you unwilling to go back because you feel your ability to manage your diabetes is compromised or because you just don't like the job? If it is the former, then speak to your parents/consultants/DSN about getting extra support, speak to your manager about making accommodations - s/he sounds pretty understanding given the time off you've had. There is help out there in terms of managing your diabetes and transitioning back into work if you need it.

If it is the latter, then your parents have been more than fair with 6 weeks! Most of us don't have the luxury of a job we love, but we go in anyway. Look for something better by all means, and again speak to your parents, they'll appreciate the honesty and may have some ideas to help. But if this is what is really holding you back, don't use your health as an excuse - you may pidgeonhole yourself and your abilities in a way that is difficult to distance yourself from in the future.

Thank you for replying. I'm more nervous about managing things on my own in front of people as I said I suffer from Autism with anxiety which makes me worry more about the simple tasks, so work opens a big huge kettle of fish for me of worry and anxiety. I'm going to speak to my manager about accommodations when the GP passes me fit to start work, they are pretty good so far!

 

[rosy_nic]

Rosy - you DO need time to get over it a bit - and everyone's different in how much time they might need - I was off 2 months! - only because my eyes wouldn't focus, actually I was bored as hell (couldn't read, watch telly, not that there was any daytime TV then anyway, knit, sew .... Aaargghh !) and more than ready to get back.

Are your parents really being selfish - or do they believe it's better for YOU to try and get out a bit more and have more structure in your life than recently? - and can they actually afford to keep you ad infinitum whilst you are not able to contribute any money towards your expenses? Have they perchance come to rely on some money for you towards Household expenses - and none of them are cheap I assure you and it DOES definitely cost more to have an extra person in the house.

Plus of course - YOU have personal expenses.

You obviously work for quite nice people, anyway - really the only way of saying 'thank you' to them is to return, isn't it? And - when I've wanted to change jobs - I have actually always found it easier to do so whilst actually IN a job - whereas if you go for an interview and they ask what you're doing now and you say 'Oh I've had to have time off cos I've only just been diagnosed with Type 1 diabetes' then it's perfectly possible for them to think 'Oooh, don't want her - she'll be off sick more than she's here!' and tell you they've decided on Joe Bloggs instead.

I'm not saying now is the right time to go back for you - or that it's the right job - but just trying to present someone else's possible points of view, is all.

Thanks 🙂 I just have had lots of time off, getting used to my medications, as I changed medication 3 weeks ago, plus my parents went away for 3 weeks when I was first diagnosed, so I need extra support in the first month, to get me back on my feet as my confidence took a really knock from it all, so it has taken this long to get it back!

I know that they want what is best for me, as they have done a lot for me since I was little, I just think that they think more about themselves, as they are retired and want more time on their own, which I thought I was doing, but it look a step back with my diagnosis. They do want me to have structure back, al though they had to deal with this before before I was made redundant from my last job, as I was 2 months without work and on Job seekers, so employment is better than on the dole. I do live on my own, but they do contribute to my bills.

I do work for nice people, all though sometimes I did not feel like that (Retail is pretty hard), but it will be good to have that confidence to have interviews in the future and not to let my condition let me down.

 

[rosy_nic]

Who's paying for your food and keep Rosie? Work is good for you it will help with your control as well as give you an income to pay your way. If you don't like the job then look for another job whilst working as it gives a better impression of you when applying for a new job.
I suspect you are worried and thinking things like "what if I hypo". It called fear of the unknown so you need to bite the bullet and make the first move. Ask that you have a phased return make sure you have plenty of hypo treatment with you and best of all you will be fine.

I pay for most of my food myself as I live mostly independently, but heavy items I get help with, as I'm not driving at the moment to carry tins of beans and big bottle of water home. I know work is better for me financial as I experienced on the dole less than 6 months ago, I will have more time to think whether this job is worth it once i start back.

I do have the fear of the unknown as I suffer from anxiety, once I start and have to bite the bullet and have hypo treatments with me

 

[rosy_nic]

Hey Rosie,
I can totally understand that you might feel anxious about going back to work, but it would be a good thing to do, then you can start fitting diabetes into your life, rather than your life revolving around your diabetes!
I wasn't fortunate enough to have a nice boss when I was diagnosed, I had to go back to work the day after I was started on insulin! I keep hypo treatments near by, or in my pocket at all times, and my glucometer is fairly nearby as well.
As others have suggested, ask for a slow phase in at work until you can get used to how working affects your BGs. My job is extremely active, so if I have a lazy weekend, I definitely notice a difference in my BGs.
It sounds as if you're unhappy in your job, so when you've got back into the swing of things, start looking for something you will enjoy. Diabetes itself doesn't stop any of us doing what we want - to a point - we can't be fighter pilots! Love or loathe her, the new PM is a type 1, that's inspiring to me!

Thanks 🙂 I have stop letting the diabetes taking my life by the horns and let it do the other way around! Sorry to hear that your boss was not as good. I have to keep my hypo treatments near me, as well as my meter. I will ask for a slow phase in at work, doing 1 shift then increasing it when I feel comfortable, and my BG does not get to low or the other way!

Once I get back in to the swing of things I might change my mind, but I will still look for another job to get something better

 

[rosy_nic]

Thanks everybody for your replies 🙂 I'm just really nervous about working again, mainly because I'm scared of having hypo's in the middle of serving customers and a queue forming, which people have been aggressive and get really stressed out. Spoke to my manager about it, and they sound really accommodating about it all, so hopefully it should go okay.

Still having issues with my parents, even suggested that they go with me to a CBT session which I got told that I would be kicked out of their house or sell my flat, so I'm going to book a CBT session to work out my issues, seem I have a problem or they have one! Will update on what my GP says when I have an apportionment tomorrow

 

[trophywench]

Hee hee Rosy - we strive as parents to actually raise our offspring to be independent people - and we have no objection whatsoever supporting them both financially and emotionally, every way, whilst they do it. Simultaneously - we also go out to work commercially and work in and around the home and garden, whilst also providing the taxi service and all the other things which parenting includes. BUT - that was indeed, hopefully - our own choice to have the kids.

Having done all that - without getting much respite from it one way or the other - we have a BIT of partial respite without them - we have a bit of time still at work commercially and in and around the home - when we get a bit more money and time for us to use and enjoy together - to actually start to enjoy the actual fruits of all our labour, for all those years. Then we retire so a bit less income normally - but HEY!! - at LAST!! - both the time and the money can be OURS!!

If we do NOT become SKI-ers - then we're exceptionally weird !

Regards from
Jenny

(Two (step)daughters, one son-in-law, 7 grandkids (eldest 25, youngest 4), two great GKs - and you BET your sweet bippy, we're SKI-ing !)

😛 🙂

 

[Jonsi]

We are not allowed to eat on the shop floor, but I might have exception encase I have a hypo, we are supposed to wear black smart trousers, but I have ones with pockets in so it might not be so much of an issue

Hi Rosy ...if having things in your pocket is a problem with work uniform etc. why not try a belt pack?? (I used to work in a Food factory and wasn't allowed anything in my pockets!) I use an Ascensia Blood Glucose kit and that comes in a neat little belt pack. For two packet tops off their Test Strips box they'll send you one free. You'd get your BG test kit and some Polos or Hypostop gel (Honey or Jam sachets are just as good) in there.