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Fiancée to a type 2 newbie

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MrsSibs2b

New Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Hi everyone!
My fiancé was diagnosed yesterday with type 2. It was done over the phone and he was told if he controls his diet, lowers his blood pressure and cholesterol levels, exercises and loses about 3 stone he should be able to control it by diet alone and to look at making an appointment with the diabetic nurse in a week or so. Personally I feel this is shocking, we both have so many questions, my head is spinning never mind his. I tried to make him an appointment today and was told the diabetic clinic at our GP surgery is fully booked until the end of April and the best I could get him was a phone call whilst he is at work on Tuesday. I don't think we should have to resort to the Internet to understand what he needs to do to control his diabetes or what I can do to support him but that's where we find ourselves. I have called Diabetes UK today and spoke to a wonderful lady who really helped answer my questions, calm me down and point me in the direction of their website and from there I have found yourselves. So hello everyone, thank you admin team for running this site and if anyone can help us get through the next few weeks of adjustment I will be forever grateful.
 
Hi MrsSibs2b, welcome to the forum 🙂 Sorry to hear about your fiancé's diagnosis. Unfortunately, we hear far too often that people are given a diagnosis and then left hanging with a minimum of information and support :(

Fortunately, you have found here an excellent resource to help you and your partner come to terms with the diagnosis and to understand what it all means. There is a wealth of knowledge and experience here so the main thing is that neither of you should feel alone - anything that is confusing or worrying you, please ask and someone will be happy to help.

I would suggest starting by reading Jennifer's Advice and Maggie Davey's letter - these will help clarify things and the approach to take. I would also recommend getting a copy of Type 2 Diabetes: The First Year by Gretchen Becker, which has proved to be an enormous help to our members - it's a very positive and easy to read explanation of how you can both move towards good blood sugar control and therefore reduce the risks from diabetes significantly. In fact, many people find that they end up feeling fitter and happier that they did before diagnosis! So, it doesn't have to be doom and gloom, and there is every chance that he will be able to continue without requiring medication for some time.

Let us know if there is anything you are unsure of and we'll do our best to help out 🙂
 
Hi MrsSibs2b and welcome to the forum. Sorry to hear about your fiance's diabetes. I've heard of people being diagnosed over the phone, and frankly it beggars belief! I think it's disgusting. 😡 I'm not surprised you're upset.

But you've come to the right place for information and support, which is what you both need right now. 😱
 
Welcome mrssibs2b, unfortunately this is all too common. I too was told over the phone and then just left to make an appointment with the nurse at the surgery when I could. This place has been amazing and I really recommend the book Northerner highlighted, I found it very useful and well written. (Just to clarify, I was initially diagnosed type 2!).
A couple of tips
Write down all your questions as they come up and take them to any appointments.
See if you can get on a DESMOND course, this is a one day course which you can both attend that gives you tips etc and explains things. Also means you meet other people.
Do think about getting a meter and testing. If your surgery won't fund it, I believe the codefree is the cheapest for buying the strips you need to test your blood.
Best of luck 🙂
 
Hello, I'm sorry to hear your news. I also had a similar phone call on the 15th January telling me I had type 2 diabetes. My bp was over 140 and my bg test 17! It was such a shock at first and like you I spent a lot of time researching it myself. Personally I didn't like ' the first year' book which I found just had too much information which I found confusing in places and terrifying in others..

My diabetes practitioner has been great giving me a wave sense Jazz monitor and test strips. I have also been put on 2 Metformin a day. I bought a blood pressure monitor myself and have stuck to a low GI diet. I also bought a Fitbit to encourage me to do 10000 steps a day though I haven't managed to stick to that! I have though lost 10 lb so far, my blood pressure is currently normal and my bg readings are regularly between 6 and 8 at the moment. I am feeling fitter and look better than I have for years.

So far so good but diabetes is a marathon not a sprint. We've got a lifetime to maintain the effort. Try not to worry too much. Lots of people are living quite successfully with it.
 
Sorry to hear your news, I was diagnosed in late november last year- but i was at least called back to the doctors where i met with the diabetic nurse(DSN).
Your surgery having a dns is a good sign, not all have them.
i went on a Diabetes uk day that gave me some very good info they are running quite a few this year - have a look at their web page. I have lost a lot of weight since november and i have found Myfitnesspal a useful app on the phone
for measuring footfall and keeping a food diary - to the point now i dont need the food diary because i know pretty well what i am eating in calories/carbs.
As has been mentioned it is a marathon not a sprint and i have only really become a bit more consigned and comfortable with diabetes in the last few weeks and even then something will catch me out and throw me of course lol.
The people on this forum have a wealth of knowledge that even just by reading the threads i have learnt more from than any other sourse and if i had needed to ask questions i know that they would have had answers.
i hope you fiancee sees the dns soon and that he can get things under control quickly
 
Thanks everyone, I really appreciate all your comments. I've ordered the book and I'm reading Maggie Davey's letter. I'm still feeling overwhelmed by it all and I think he is too. He suggested having a takeaway as a treat tonight but we are no where close to knowing how to judge it all. Its such a minefield.
 
The main thing to consider is carbohydrates - rice, potatoes, pasta, bread, plus sugary things, obviously. These are what will raise the blood sugar levels to a greater or lesser degree. Some will cause a rapid rise (a 'spike'), some a slower, gentler rise - the latter are what he needs to aim for (and you as well, of course, since a diet that is good for a person with diabetes is good for everyone! 🙂). A useful guide to these 'slow and steady release' items is the GI/GL diet (Glycaemic Index/Glycasemic Load) - The GL Diet for Dummies is a useful introduction.

Also, people have different tolerances for things, so one person might be fine with, for example, toast or cereal in the morning, whereas others need to avoid them. As has been mentioned, testing before and after eating to discover the effect of particular meals is the best (if not the only way) what should be avoided and what can be safely enjoyed without impacting blood sugar levels adversely, so having the ability to do this is desirable whilst learning how to tailor diet. 🙂 If his GP says he doesn't need to test (as many do, thinking they are saving money) then it may be necessary to fund the tester and strips yourself - the cheapest option we have come across here is the SD Codefree Meter with test strips at around £7 for 50, but it is worth asking the GP first once you understand what is required.

Apologies if I am overloading you with yet more information! Take things in at your own pace, and ask any questions as they occur to you 🙂 There is no point in making radical changes that can't be sustained, or their effects understood. Regular daily exercise will also be a tremendous help! 🙂
 
Good luck Mrs S 2b 😉 Low carbs & keep active. Go for walks after tea, cut down & work at it. Please keep asking 🙂
 
This is a brilliant forum full of lovely people who know so much and are happy to share it with you. I was given a grim prognosis and was so scared and alone, but the forum saved me. It is not easy but he can do it and is fortunate to have you to help him. I had a BG similar to his in September 2012 and have got it down to 5.4 now. I cut out sugar and lowered carbs and take exercise each day. A ten minute brisk walk after each meal will do it. Good luck and try not to be overwhelmed just take small steps and it will happen. 🙂
 
Welcome aboard, and sorry to hear your other half had such cavalier treatment by his GP, it really isn't good enough to give a diagnosis of a lifelong condition over the phone :(. The better news is he can adapt and it can be controlled it just takes a bit of adjustment to get there 🙂. Everyone here is lovely and will help as much as they can, but it takes time to adjust to emotionally and practically and it can feel like food has gone from a pleasure to a pain overnight. He's lucky to have you in his corner 🙂
 
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