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Depressed newbie

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.
...and the NHS? I'm as English / British as they come.... it's a great service but the wheels are falling off and the whole system creaking. My NI and Tax could service a small South American GDP. Sadly we don't get value for money, certainly here in the West Mids. It's abused and maltreated by a significant majority and the cumbersome ludicrous top heavy bureaucracy strangles the life out of the system - as do the Clinical Negligence Lawyers who often circle like vultures.... and trust me, I know!
 
americaninlondon said:
And I belive I said that even I thought my own attitude was terrible and that for me it was a strange situation because I am not used to it and it is VERY different than US healthcare with much less privacy. I said it was different not better or worse and why am I defending myself to you? I have created british jobs and I will continue to do so.
Click to expand...

Hi amil,

I didn't see your post as critical, just your experience at coming from a different culture. I was in hospital 8 days when I was admitted and was moved to 6 wards/rooms during that time, which I accepted because I expected it. My previous experience of hospital was in Sweden when I broke my leg - there I was in a private room all the time and it was much more 'upmarket' than the UK!

At the end of the day though, I found it was the people that made it a positive experience for me - wonderful nurses and doctors.
 
Hi

I know it is a clich? and seems really easy for some of us to say but it really does get better, being first diagnosed us such a huge shock and so much changes suddenly both physically and perhaps more importantly emotionally. I went into denial for a year or so and tried to 'pretend' it wasn't really happening to me. Of course everyone is different but I've found once I resolved to tackle it head on it impacts far less on my day to day life than it did when I ignored it.
I'm naturally quite a competitive person so for me it was all about setting myself challenges and doing whatever necessary to get there. I signed up for a race, got sponsored, in aid of diabetes uk, it then kind of became that the race was the challenge and taking control of my diabetes was almost a side effect of taking up running, it seemed to take the pressure off if that makes sense...?

As for getting the most out of health services it seems obvious but the best tool is knowledge. Maybe get a good book on diabetes, do the OU course, trawl the diabetes uk website etc, whatever it is you need to understand what's happening. It may be worth asking what diabetes courses are run near you, i did dafne which is type 1 but i believe desmond is run for type2. Or join your local support group.Maybe read up on the NICE guidelines of what to expect from your doctor so you can go prepared and knowledgable of your rights and also get the best out of your healthcare, it really is a case of working in partnership with your healthcare team.

How that all makes sense, i feel I'm rambling now! Feel free to private message me if I can be if help!

(have to say, like a few others I'm very interested in your background. I lived in VA for a while and did a lot of travelling in the southern states, loved every minute if it so if you need a distraction from talking about diabetes I could talk about how much I miss it for hours!!!)
 
Amil,
I'm really sorry to see your last post, but at the end of it all it's your life -you do with it what you will. When I first came home from the hospital I couldn't see, couldn't walk without a stick and support, couldn't feel my feet, and my fingers didn't work properly. Now i can walk again, I can see and drive. I'm back at work and my hands and feet are much improved and getting better. I've read a lot of posts on this site and everyone wants to help and make you feel more positive - but that is your descision. I look at it this way - there are people in wheelchairs that would like to walk as badly as me, there are blind people that would like my eyes and I've seen burns victims that would love to have my hands. I'm not as good physically as i used to be, but truth be told even with all the complications I feel I'm a better person now than I was then. I wouldn't go back if I could. Don't wallow in self pity and don't ask "why me?". No positives can come from that. It's happened and you are where you are. Let other people help you or don't, ultimately it's your choice, but we're here if you need us.
 
Americaninlondon

I hope you are beginning to feel better. I'm sorry your experience with the NHS wasn't too good but hope it won't put you off getting the best you can out of the system. From the posts on this forum I'm learning more and more about how care varies across the country

Don't worry too much at this early stage - you will gain in confidence and knowledge over time. If you're anything like me, though, you will find much to rant about - my pet topic of the moment is restaurant menus that assume everybody can eat sticky, gooey, puddings without concern. Find myself looking at the starter menu to see if there is a fresh fruit alternative - confuses some waiters immensely

Take care




Vanessa
 
I am sorry if I offended you AMIL. As I said more than once in my post, I did not mean to. I think that it is nice to find other people and all agree on something, but people are different and it is not a bad thing if people have different opinions on things sometimes, this is a discussion site and so there should be discussion and debate on different issues and there is nothing wrong in that. I don't think I was looking for a fight, in fact that is the last thing I want or need, if you read my earlier post you will know I am also depressed and like many others right now am in fear of my job, so I do not want to create any more stress for myself.

As for GPs, I posted in that thread and said my GP was really bad. As I said, the NHS is not perfect and I know it has many faults, some are very bad ones, and I am not a fan of GPs. But I do think it is a great institution and there are some very dedicated hardworking people within it.

If you really feel your house is too bad for you to tackle, there is a TV programme called 'How Clean is Your House?' where the two presenters and their assistants go to someone's house and help them clean it. The presenters do not seem nasty at all, their manner is a bit like a teacher, making sure you do something and then praising you when it is done, they seem to be really happy when people manage to keep their houses clean and the people seem happier and healthier themselves for the experience. They have very good tips on using things like lemon juice or other household products to clean your house and of course they do it with you and their assistants also seem to do a lot, so you won't be tackling it alone. The website is at http://www.channel4.com/4homes/on-tv/how-clean-is-your-house/, it has lots of great tips and you can also watch previous episodes. To take part you need to go to http://www.channel4.com/microsites/T/takepart/how-clean.html There have been some people whose houses are really bad who have been on there, some literally were knee deep in clutter, some had rooms they physically could not get into, who knows maybe your house will not be bad enough to get on there. Maybe it is a crazy idea but I thought I would let you know anyway. At least you could get some tips even if you can't face taking part.

Otherwise, if you feel you cannot face that, and cannot manage it one small bit at a time, I agree with other people that you should pay someone to get it clean for you. I sort of understand why you would be embarrassed in a way. But at the end of the day these people are paid to clean houses, if everyone had a spotless house they would be out of a job. They must see a lot of dirty houses, probably a lot worse than yours.

Apologies again if I upset you. I didn't mean anything personal to you. I was only speaking up for the NHS not trying to fight with or attack you.
 
you have made the first step and in the right place i dont think there is any one on this site who doesnt understand or been there i know i have .you can always try antidepreesants they worked for me and still are i know it seems like more drugs but they can really help.you are a strong person and you now have alot of people behind you.keep in touch
 
depression

We all talk about health care, but how many really know just what happens when services are commissioned??, I have bitter experience of the system,over the past two years I have attend meetings with officers of my local Primary Care Trust as a patient rep and for Diabetes UK as a member and a member of Diabetes UK Campaigners Network, every thing is fine with them, the system's are put in place, everything is set up nothing can go wrong !, oh no!, we forgot about the patients, and here lies the problems with todays health service, non clinical managers holding on to money because they know best !!, and as long as it meets the required numbers who is going to worry about patients!, not management thats for sure, a hospital might have a really good Cardiology unit but the PCT contracts it to another hospital so Cardiology at that hospital collapses, a very well known heart hospital in Cambridgeshire is falling apart because it is being closed down and moved to Cambridge, so the good name will vanish as will the staff because all I have spoken to will not move to the new hospital, no thought for patients or staff, then just to add insult to injury they are extending the hospital at a vast cost, and in just a few years it will be knocked down for housing, what we have to learn fast is he that shouts loudest gets it, so I in my area I shout as loud as I can, we as sufferers of this condition / illness have to shout for each other and give real meaningfull support to each other, because you won't get it from elsewhere in the health service unless you are very lucky !!.😡
 
i know exactly where you are coming from, yesterday i hit a wall. i thought i was coping with being diabetic but obviously im not. i have let everything get on top of me since i was diagnosed, i am not functioning at work, things i should be doing i aint, people are carrying me and i feel like i have lost control completely, which i dont deal with well, i am under soooo much pressure to be normal that when anyone asked i was always fine. but yesterday was the last straw, as a team leader i have to be strong but i just couldnt cope anymore. i finally admitted that i aint right and i have not given myself enough time to adjust. i am terrified that people will think im weak, i am paranoid that people will think i cant handle it and talk about me behind my back, was at the doctor today and he gave me a week off work and will review me nex monday, will give me time to reasses what my next step is and decide if i want to continue in my current role, i sympathise completely americaninlondon, depression is a horrible horrible thing but it just takes time to adjust, god knows i found that out to my peril yesterday....x
 
Hi, I'm Rachael 31
I was diagnosed as T2 in May, a month after getting married. We'd been together for 12 years. We have 4 children. I was tired and exhausted all the time, i went to doctors. Found out i had diabetes. I was a bit shocked cos I thought i would be ok for at least another 10 years. Both my parents were diabetic. My dad was insulin dependant my mum is diet controlled.

Anyway i was doing really well with my diet, lost quite a bit of weight, feeling a lot better. But end of october My dad died of a heart attack and kidney failure. I've been comfort eating on sweets and chocolate, my sugar levels have gone back up and i'm tired all time again. I'm trying to get back on top again but struggling. Just taking each day at a time, and trying to watch what i'm eating.
 
Stick with it Rachel!

You know what you should be and shouldn't be doing 😉 - which is a huge start. Just remember- high bs makes you feel worse not better so cut down (not out completely - we all have our limits!) on those sweeties and chocolates. The tiredness is definitely a side effect of high bs - but it is also a side effect of mild depression - hopefully sorting those bs levels out will help. It is horrendous losing a parent - remember the good times and his smile. Thoughts are with you and if you need a rant - friendly ear I am always here xx
 
Every diabetic goes through it

Hi I was somewhat moved by this post, I think every diabetic I have ever spoken to goes through some form of denial, rejection etc. You are not alone and hopefully you will get to speak to some really helpful people on here and make you realise you will never be alone...
From a Type 1 for just over 32 years, take it from me it gets better and easier...
 
To Rach . . .

I was in a similar situation to you last year.

Dont be to hard on yourself right now, its gets easier. Taking it a day at a time is a great place to start.

x
 
Hi americaninlondon,
I am sorry to hear that you have been having a bad time of things. I guess we can all point to similar experiences and sympathies with you. Besides letting you know that you are not alone, I am not sure what else it might achieve. Empathically speaking however, it must be very isolating for you, especially in a city. You appear to have made a good start in making contact with a group of people, the most convenient way you can, on the internet. In such times as these, despise not the day of small things. Work within your capability and build your stamina slowly. You sound a very accomplished person so you will pull through this. have you tried making a list of small things you can do that are within your capability that will make you smile.
 
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