Daughter Sneakily eating food keep finding wrappers…

[Callista]

I know T1 is genetic/auto immune and not lifestyle, but my point was to try and make a virtue out of necessity. She is going to have to have a healthier diet, in order to manage her diabetes, and the 'upside' of that is that she will be healthier altogether - and therefore 'better looking' (!). That, as I say, might just be an effective motivator for her.

If she can come to see a 'beneficial side effect' (!), so to speak, she might be more willing to come out of denial/rebellion???

All that said, of course it's frightening to discover, as a child (or at any age really) that there is something 'wrong' with you healthwise, so denial is a very reasonable reaction. Which is why I would say that making contact with others who have also had to cope with that could hopefully be helpful and reassuring.

 

[Inka]

How do you know her diet was unhealthy before? Yes, everyone should be eating a healthy diet but the diet recommended for Type 1s is the same healthy diet recommended for everyone else. That includes some ‘treats’ like chocolate. The issue here isn’t that she’s eating chocolate, it’s that she’s not bolusing for it. Chocolate, cheesecake, cake, fruit crumbles, meringues, croissants, eclairs, flapjacks, biscuits, doughnuts, muffins - those are just some of the things I’ve eaten in the last year. The difference is that I did the calculations and bolused for them. It’s the lack of insulin that’s the issue not the food. I don’t eat vast amounts of any of those things but that’s not because I’m Type 1, it’s for general health just like anyone else. If I ate the world’s most healthy diet and didn’t use my insulin correctly, my blood sugar would be uncontrolled. Type 1 is about the insulin.

Eating disorders are far more common in Type 1s and for someone struggling with the stress of a Type 1 diagnosis, trivialising comments about it being a motivator for healthy eating, or going on a special diet or whatever aren’t wise. It implies blame, it underestimates the psychological effect of a Type 1 diagnosis, it misunderstands the needs of Type 1, and it encourages secrecy and disordered eating.

 

[Callista]

it’s also big bars of chocolate grab bags of crisps she buys in the shop after school sometimes
**

That doesn't sound healthy for anyone, diabetic or not.

Again, my point was to try and get some kind of 'handle' or 'inroad' on the diabetes, so she can learn to accept and manage it, irrespective of whether it's a 'gimmick' or not. Whatever works, gets through to her, is good. Even an appeal to her very natural teenage vanity (I don't mean she's 'vain' I mean that all teens want to look good, and why not?)

Of course the food is an issue - you've said so yourself: "I don’t eat vast amounts of any of those things but that’s not because I’m Type 1, it’s for general health just like anyone else."

I'm now getting healthier myself - because I'm now scared about going diabetic. In that respect, the scare has 'done me good' - ie, there's been an upside to it! Finding that 'upside' for the OP's daughter might be the way forward she needs. It might not, but it might.

But there we are - I've made my suggestion, up to the OP to consider or discard it.

 

[Lucyr]

Finding that 'upside' for the OP's daughter might be the way forward she needs. It might not, but it might.

There’s literally no upside to insulin dependent diabetes, it’s hard work for no benefits, just to avoid complications

 

[Inka]

Exactly @Lucyr In addition, I teach my children self-worth not to judge their worth by how attractive others find them…

There might be an upside for someone being diagnosed pre-diabetic who is then spurred to improve their diet, but that’s totally different from a child diagnosed with Type 1. Imagine going up to that child in person and talking about “up sides”! There is no upside at all and even as an adult I find that idea upsetting and offensive. It would have been a hundred times worse as a teen, especially the implication that I’d brought it on myself and should now eat more healthily. It just reinforces myths and ignorance.

 

[Callista]

There was no implication that Type 1 is self-caused!

But the concept of 'upside' is different. When bad things happen in life, whatever they are, it is up to us to try and get 'something' out of it.

I won't debate this any longer. Bad things have happened to me in my life, and we get up from under or we go under. It's vital to develop the psychology to do so.

 

[Flower]

Hi I’m literally at my wits end.. I keep finding wrappers hidden in my daughters room where she’s sneaking food mainly choc and crisps and she’s not taking insulin for them either.. her bloods are high most of the time because she keeps doing this and I’m fighting a losing battle trying to get her bg down. She’s been diagnosed since sept 2021 and is 13. I keep those things in the house for pack lunch things for my partner and son but I’m thinking I’m going to have to start keeping stuff locked in my wardrobe because it keeps happening and daughter keeps lying to me.. has anyone experienced this? She’s aware of what can happen if bloods are high all the time but just doesn’t care. Really struggling with her

Hi @danmark

I was a teenager 40 years ago dealing with Type 1. It is a really tough thing, not wanting to be different to my friends or have to give a thought to what I ate. I really did want to talk to people of a similar age dealing with T1 but it was pre internet /forums etc so I carried on being incredibly angry about it all and eating what I wanted if I felt like it - there wasnt blood glucose testing or MDI/pumps back then so I could relatively easily ignore it. It didn't ignore me though!

Your daughter might recoil in horror at the suggestion of meeting others living with T1, I know I did when my Mum suggested it but in reality it is the best possible thing to meet other people dealing with the same/similar challenges. There are some DUK family events where people her age or similar meet up with their families and there's help, advice, fun etc. I get it's a really hard sell but it might just be a way through to see that everyone else is having the same feelings, struggles about T1and maybe make some friends or even laugh about some of it. I had an idea that everyone else dealing with T1 - although as a teenager I didn't know anyone else- was some sort of T1 genius with perfect results, easily fitting everything in to their lives and generally excelling at managing the whole thing. I thought I was the only one struggling. It was a lightbulb moment when I realised everyone had struggles with it.

Here is the info about the Duk family events https://www.diabetes.org.uk/how_we_help/type-1-events/family-events

and this is the DUK page about teenagers and diabetes - not all will be relevant but well worth a read. https://www.diabetes.org.uk/guide-to-diabetes/your-child-and-diabetes/top-teen-tips

Wishing you all well.🙂

 

[Satan’s little helper]

Her bg is high it’s been high for a while we are working with the nurses to get it down but this problem isn’t helping matters, She is struggling but won’t admit it the nurse asked her if she would like to talk to someone but she said no, she keeps a lot inside.. she hates being diabetic
I feel so helpless it kills me inside and I would literally take it for her if I could

Hello, after a more than a few decades I’m not a “happy clapper” regarding the condition by any stretch of the imagination.

You can’t take this one for “the team.” (My mum gave me that talk.) Are you able to say, “OK, I’ve detected you have this foodstuff, work out your dose for it. & it’s yours. Enjoy.”

You know the “seed of your loins,” better than we do.

 

[danmark]

Thank you for all the response.. I do think talking to people her age with type 1 would be good for her so I will look into that, we have been put forward for psychotherapy aswell to see if that helps although I’m not really holding my breath for that one..the main reasons for her not bolusing are she doesn’t really understand how to work anything out, I have tried to show her but she’s not been interested so I havnt pushed it but the nurses are going to make an appointment for her to go to the hospital so they can show her which will be better as I think she will listen, she is also finding injections painful so this is the main reason why she’s not wanting to inject for food.. she is always hungry and carb free foods just don’t cut it sometimes. I don’t want to restrict or hide food from her because I think this isn’t the way to go she doesn’t need punishing she needs support more than anything.. I have said there’s no need to hide wrappers and eat in secret because if you want something you can have it, it’s just about balance and trying to be a bit healthier with food choices and not always turning to crisps and chocolate..I just have to do my best with guiding her in the right direction. Diabetes Is such an emotional rollercoaster all we can do is our best x

 

[Dragonheart]

Yes, everyone should be eating a healthy diet but the diet recommended for Type 1s is the same healthy diet recommended for everyone else. That includes some ‘treats’ like chocolate. The issue here isn’t that she’s eating chocolate, it’s that she’s not bolusing for it. Chocolate, cheesecake, cake, fruit crumbles, meringues, croissants, eclairs, flapjacks, biscuits, doughnuts, muffins - those are just some of the things I’ve eaten in the last year.

Is that healthy diet for anyone though regardless of whether they are diabetic or not, type 1 or type 2, insulin produced internally or administered externally? Processed, high carb, sugary junk that does no one any favours. Eaten to excess they will require more and more insulin (from somewhere) and ultimately may lead to insulin resistance, obesity and other health complications. I get that a type 1 theoretically has access to the same food choices as a non diabetic if they can match their insulin to their needs but that doesn’t mean “eat anything” for them any more than it should for anyone else.

I also appreciate the issue from the original post is about a whole lot more than matching insulin to food. There’s acceptance, risk awareness, rebellion, self image, honesty and the issue of hiding food going on. I’m just commenting on the “she can eat anything she wants” aspect of the discussion

 

[Inka]

Yes, Type 1 is very different from Type 2. As you’ll see, I don’t suggest eating lots of ‘treat’ foods anymore than I’d suggest someone without diabetes eats lots of them. In fact, I say we should be eating healthily. Type 1 is an auto-immune condition and nothing to do with insulin resistance. The diet recommended for Type 1s is the same healthy diet recommended for everyone else. But, as you say, this is far from the issue in this opening post, which is connected to the trauma of a Type 1 diagnosis in a young person.

 

[Lucyr]

the main reasons for her not bolusing are she doesn’t really understand how to work anything out

There’s a couple of options for phone apps that calculate insulin doses if that would help. MyLife is the one my clinic reccomends and MySugr is another common one. You have to set them up with ratios but it then takes the maths out for you.

 

[SB2015]

Thank you for all the response.. I do think talking to people her age with type 1 would be good for her so I will look into that, we have been put forward for psychotherapy aswell to see if that helps although I’m not really holding my breath for that one..the main reasons for her not bolusing are she doesn’t really understand how to work anything out, I have tried to show her but she’s not been interested so I havnt pushed it but the nurses are going to make an appointment for her to go to the hospital so they can show her which will be better as I think she will listen, she is also finding injections painful so this is the main reason why she’s not wanting to inject for food.. she is always hungry and carb free foods just don’t cut it sometimes. I don’t want to restrict or hide food from her because I think this isn’t the way to go she doesn’t need punishing she needs support more than anything.. I have said there’s no need to hide wrappers and eat in secret because if you want something you can have it, it’s just about balance and trying to be a bit healthier with food choices and not always turning to crisps and chocolate..I just have to do my best with guiding her in the right direction. Diabetes Is such an emotional rollercoaster all we can do is our best x

Hi @danmark from someone coming late to this thread. so pleased that you have found the forum, where there will be plenty of support for you.

T1 is hard work for us all, and as others have said , dealing with this alongside being a teenager is even harder.

I am glad that your daughter is going to get help with her carb counting. Having read through this thread that was one thing that stood out for me. If she can get a better understanding of working out how much insulin is needed she might then be more willing to inject. Perhaps work out the carbs at meals with her, rather than do it for her. This is something she is going to have to learn to do eventually, (and it could help her with her Maths, not that that will be seen as a big bonus possibly - from a retired Maths teacher) I have got to know the carbs in most biscuits that I eat now and the same with snacks and choc bars. So they go together. Could you show her the labels on the snacks. For these they are often labelled on the back.

You mention that her injections hurt. Some of the cheaper needles are a lot more painful than others. I was switched from BD microfine to GlucoRX and suddenly got loads of bruises. I got switched back. Another option that might be worth considering with her PDSN is a pump. One needle in every two or three days rather than multiple injections each day, BUT then she has a pump attached which might not appeal.

@Flower mentioned about the T1 Family weekends. I volunteer on these and they were the first time that I had been with so many others who have T1. As a volunteer it had such a positive impact on me, being one of the ‘normal’ people with just a few ‘muggles’ around who weren’t injecting. It was the first time I had seen others just getting on with life with T1 and just enjoying themselves and just dealing with the hypos and hypers that are an inevitable Part of life with T1. It was also such a privilege to see the impact of these events on all the family. I work with the parents and to see the big impact on them of having time to talk to other parents who ‘get it’ was fantastic.

Keep the questions coming and tap into all the experience on here.

 

[Dragonheart]

Yes, Type 1 is very different from Type 2. As you’ll see, I don’t suggest eating lots of ‘treat’ foods anymore than I’d suggest someone without diabetes eats lots of them. In fact, I say we should be eating healthily. Type 1 is an auto-immune condition and nothing to do with insulin resistance. The diet recommended for Type 1s is the same healthy diet recommended for everyone else. But, as you say, this is far from the issue in this opening post, which is connected to the trauma of a Type 1 diagnosis in a young person.

I’m already well aware they are different, type 1 is autoimmune, not caused by insulin resistance (but ir can develop with high insulin usage), has the same diet recommendations as the general public and nothing I said suggested I believed any of those things were the case.

 

[Inka]

I’m already well aware they are different, type 1 is autoimmune, not caused by insulin resistance (but it can develop with high insulin usage), has the same diet recommendations as the general public and nothing I said suggested I believed any of those things were the case.

Then I apologise. I read your post as suggesting I’d said that it was ‘good to eat those things’ because you’d quoted my post.

 

[Dragonheart]

Then I apologise. I read your post as suggesting I’d said that it was ‘good to eat those things’ because you’d quoted my post.

Thank you.

My original post didn’t mean to infer you thought those things were actively “good” but it certainly seemed to me by your list of junk food that you were saying there was no problem with them. I was simply saying they can be a problem for anyone. Your comment in post #31 “As you’ll see, I don’t suggest eating lots of ‘treat’ foods anymore than I’d suggest someone without diabetes eats lots of them” was much clearer to me. A misunderstanding both ways it seems.

 

[SB2015]

but it can develop with high insulin usage

I am unclear why high insulin usage would cause T1. Can you clarify?

Presumably if someone is using insulin and is not T1, then they are T2 and using insulin.
I know that there is a common misconception that when a T2 starts to take insulin they ‘become T1’.
As you say T1 is caused by an antibody attack on the beta cells.
Why would a high dose of insulin cause GAD antibodies be triggered?

 

[ShaunM]

Hi I’m literally at my wits end.. I keep finding wrappers hidden in my daughters room where she’s sneaking food mainly choc and crisps and she’s not taking insulin for them either.. her bloods are high most of the time because she keeps doing this and I’m fighting a losing battle trying to get her bg down. She’s been diagnosed since sept 2021 and is 13. I keep those things in the house for pack lunch things for my partner and son but I’m thinking I’m going to have to start keeping stuff locked in my wardrobe because it keeps happening and daughter keeps lying to me.. has anyone experienced this? She’s aware of what can happen if bloods are high all the time but just doesn’t care. Really struggling with her

Hi I’m New diagnosed since last year it’s very hard to get used to changing what you have done for years especially junk food that is so addictive even I have had days where I have splurged on junk food away from the view of my family because I was sick of not being able to have stuff so she probably feels left out it’s hard watchibg others enjoying food it really is maybe let her have snacks that aren’t as bad I still have crisps the odd takeaway ect sarnies sugar free fizzys but maybe once or twice a week will maybe make her less likely to hide stuff 7 is very young to fully understand the repercussions of high blood sugar

 

[Inka]

Thank you.

My original post didn’t mean to infer you thought those things were actively “good” but it certainly seemed to me by your list of junk food that you were saying there was no problem with them. I was simply saying they can be a problem for anyone. Your comment in post #31 “As you’ll see, I don’t suggest eating lots of ‘treat’ foods anymore than I’d suggest someone without diabetes eats lots of them” was much clearer to me. A misunderstanding both ways it seems.

Thank you too 🙂 What I was trying to say was that sometimes foods are seen as forbidden and that just makes someone - especially a younger someone - want them more. The major issue here - apart from the quantity, which hopefully will settle down - is the lack of bolusing for the foods. Better to eat two flapjacks and bolus correctly, than one and not bolus at all.

There are also other risks associated with insulin and disordered eating, so a ‘compromise’ of eating ‘treats’ and bolusing as required is sensible. I found the desire to eat lots gradually faded as my control got better, and I realised I could still eat them with the appropriate insulin/thought. In the beginning, everything feels haywire and almost out of control. Psychologically, it all takes a while to ease off too. When no-one around you has Type 1, it can be a lonely place.

 

[Dragonheart]

I am unclear why high insulin usage would cause T1. Can you clarify?

Presumably if someone is using insulin and is not T1, then they are T2 and using insulin.
I know that there is a common misconception that when a T2 starts to take insulin they ‘become T1’.
As you say T1 is caused by an antibody attack on the beta cells.
Why would a high dose of insulin cause GAD antibodies be triggered?

Insulin resistance in type 1, not type 1 itself. Different statement entirely. I’ve clarified my other post to make sure that’s clearer


fully understand a type 2 on insulin is still type 2 (unless misdiagnosed LADA that is!)