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Help with my mum! Advice!

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.

kathryn conway

New Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Hello everyone 🙂 not sure where to turn so thought I'd try here first! My mum is 56 and as had diabetes since she was 18 and takes insulin twice a day. She is now having hypo after hypo, one a month where we have to phone the ambulance out. She's had two this week. The thing is she is either in denial or embarrassed by having them. When she as them she lashes out and I'm 7 months pregnant so im worried she will lash out at me while i try give her food to bring her round. She lives alone and feel a bit stressed out and getting nattering about how she is, I feel like she won't do anything to help herself either. Any advice? X
 
Hello Kathryn. Sorry to here about your Mam. I was talking to Paramedics a couple of weeks ago & was telling them what a hypo was like in your head. Your head is in the clouds ! YOU are fighting for you life & not with the nice people who are trying to help you. T1s are so independent & do not like to be told when in certain hypos. Really really good luck & pls keep asking. If we can help we will 🙂
 
Would she be able to speak to her health care team re the amount of insulin she takes as it appears she's on too much or switching to a more flexible regime where you match the insulin to what you eat? This is known as MDI (multiple daily injections) where you take a long lasting insulin and rapid acting with each meal. That way you don't have to eat a set amount at set times to avoid going high or low.
 
Hi Kathryn. Do you know what insulin your Mum takes? If it's twice a day then it is probably a mixed insulin. This type of regime for managing T1 is considered a bit outdated and most people now use what's called MDI or basal/bolus. Although it involves more injections (normally four - 1 long acting and 3 short acting) it tends to lead to better control. It won't eliminate hypos as they're just a part of living with T1 but control should improve. If she can speak to her diabetes team in the first place and discuss with them. Hope it gets sorted.
 
Would she be able to speak to her health care team re the amount of insulin she takes as it appears she's on too much or switching to a more flexible regime where you match the insulin to what you eat? This is known as MDI (multiple daily injections) where you take a long lasting insulin and rapid acting with each meal. That way you don't have to eat a set amount at set times to avoid going high or low.
To be honest I don't no too much about her diabetes, apart from she injects twice a day after dinner and tea. And I think she goes to the diabetes clinic once a year. So really she could do with an appointment with the diabetes clinic to discuss her insulin? As I do see her eating so it's not like she's missing meals or anything like that. She doesn't seem to want to help herself. Thank you for your reply x
 
She probably doesn't know they can help her Kathryn - medics seem to assume when we've had D a long time - we know 'everything'. Well - very often - we don't - cos nobody told us previously cos they ALL assumed that. Mind you - you do have to say 'I need help' otherwise they don't have a clue - and we can't expect them to.

I'm 67 - and my clinic nurses are my mates! I was in a different hospital recently and struggling so asked to see one of their nurses - she was great too and a brilliant help - but wouldn't have come to see some strange woman with a broken knee in the first place - unless I'd asked to see her.

My life changed for the better at about the same age your mom is now - when I was so frustrated at not being able to fathom out why the D wasn't behaving - I asked for help and kept asking till I got it.
 
She probably doesn't know they can help her Kathryn - medics seem to assume when we've had D a long time - we know 'everything'. Well - very often - we don't - cos nobody told us previously cos they ALL assumed that. Mind you - you do have to say 'I need help' otherwise they don't have a clue - and we can't expect them to.

I'm 67 - and my clinic nurses are my mates! I was in a different hospital recently and struggling so asked to see one of their nurses - she was great too and a brilliant help - but wouldn't have come to see some strange woman with a broken knee in the first place - unless I'd asked to see her.

My life changed for the better at about the same age your mom is now - when I was so frustrated at not being able to fathom out why the D wasn't behaving - I asked for help and kept asking till I got it.
That's the thing she isn't asking for help
I think she doesn't want to worry any of the family so when she as a hypo the first thing she says is 'don't tell anyone' would I be aloud to make a appointment for my mum or would she have to do this herself. thank you for your reply x
 
Hi Kathryn,

As has been said it sounds as if your Mum is on a quite outdated method of insulin delivery. I was on mixed insulin in the 1980's and there are better ways where you split the long acting insulin from the quick acting you take with food. Smaller doses of insulin delivered maybe 4/5 times a day cuts down the amount of insulin circulating at any time and hopefully reduces the risk of hypos. It isn't her fault, diabetes is a lifelong challenge and as Trophtwench says it can be assumed that because we've been dealing with it for decades we know exactly what to do. Sometimes we can get left behind on outdated methods of management when a new approach would make a massive improvement. .She does need to get some quick and appropriate advice on better balancing the insulin she takes with the food she eats. You do need to be proactive when you know things aren't going well and the improvements do make any effort to get some help very worthwhile.

Having regular hypos that require assistance is a very worrying and dangerous way to be and it doesn't need to be like that. Speak to her and encourage her to get in touch with her diabetes team or if she doesn't have a team then get her to contact her gp to arrange a referral. Keeping quiet won't address the problems she is having and there are fantastic diabetes medics around who will want to help her manage it more effectively and to feel so much safer.

I wish you both well. 🙂
 
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Thank you for your response, I actually read out your reply to my mum and she's agreed to go to the diabetic clinic and see someone so there's a start 🙂 she's just said she's been on the same insulin for years so maybe they will try something else like what you said. As I don't see why she is having them, sometimes it's 3 times a week and she never skips meals it's strange. I do feel for her as I no she can't help it but at least now she's willing to get help. I didn't realise it was so common till I found this forum. My mum could do with coming on here and talking. Thanks again xx
 
Yes she could do with joining - like every single one of us I'd bet she doesn't know any other Type 1s -and also assumes cos nobody told us different way back when - that once you've sorted out how much insulin you need that's it forever.

Well - it never is - cos WE change, and that's not anything to do with age either.
 
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