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Do Not Under Any Circumstances Try This At Home

  • Thread starter Thread starter Diabeticliberty
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Diabeticliberty

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To put the thread title another way: now I've gone and done it. All rather giddy at what I am surprising myself with with cooking stuff for myself. This evenings dinner is a hot potch of chopped up vegetables including onions, tomatoes, peppers, mushrooms and a few other assorted things lurking in my cupboard all grilled together with a whopping great chunk of sirloin steak which I had dutifully deposited with tiny chunks of extremely red and extremely hot in fact extremely red hot chilli's the whole affair was grilling away quite nicely under my new most beloved George Foreman grill. I was making my way to the sink to wash my hands before slicing up potatoes and sneezed from chopping up the red onions that I love so much. Pinching my nose with my fingers my 4th finger poked into my right eye and some of the residue of the the very red very hot very red hot chilli's now coats my eyeball and it it excruciatingly painful. Please tell me why it never happens like this for Delia Smith or that geezer with the beard who swears a lot?
 
DeusXM said:
You think that's bad?

Be VERY careful when you go for a pee...
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I LOVE IT. Deus my man I have just nearly choked myself laughing at your reply while eating my concoction. Worth it though - hilarious 🙂
 
I know it is not nice to laugh at others misfortunes but ......... I daresay the likes of Delia have done things like that but they are edited out. I have watched one of those cookery programmes where one minute he is chopping the meat and the next he is still chopping the meat but with a blue plaster on. I wonder what went on inbetween. However I hope the pain subsides quickly. I bet you wont be doing it again though.
 
I try not to laugh at other people's misfortunes too. I must confess though had anybody else said that they had done this I would not have been able to help myself but laugh my proverbial head off. One of my parents once told me that the fastest lessons are the ones that hurt the most. It was not quite so amusing as today's misfortune as I was taken to A+E to have a piece of tarmac that had the extremely poor taste to embed itself in the back of my head removed and some stitches put in. Following that encounter I never again played rugby in the street. Following today's misfortune I think I might employ a sous chef or pair of welding goggles 🙂
 
Swimming goggles work well to keep chilli or onion juice / fumes out of eyes.
 
Safety glasses & welders goggles might help too 🙂. Chillies are good for you 🙂
 
Don't be such a baby, you don't know pain until you've been hospitalised courtesy of your older brother who believed your mother's ornamental chilli plant possessed magical powers. If you squash the ornamental chillies and rub them in your eyes you can see the fairies don't you know. It's true, the fairies appear when your eyes are so swollen they feel like they might explode, sadly the fairies disappear once they start shooting high speed water into your swollen eyeballs. Did you see a fairy? If it was that diabetes fairy I hope you gave her a good talking to 🙄
 
The 3 words that describe me are filthy stinking rich. OK, maybe it's just 2 of those words.:D
 
One of my OH ex's ended up with the nickname Hot Lips at a car show. I'll let you work out what happened............
 
Stitch147 said:
One of my OH ex's ended up with the nickname Hot Lips at a car show. I'll let you work out what happened............
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If I have worked it out the way I think you are letting me work it out then my eyes have started bleeding from screwing them up so tightly 😱
 
Diabeticliberty said:
If I have worked it out the way I think you are letting me work it out then my eyes have started bleeding from screwing them up so tightly 😱
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Haha!!! I think you are probably on the right lines then!!! Our friends had a right giggle at the time about it apparently. I bet his ex didnt.
 
I was in Thailand and after showering one evening I experienced a very unpleasant burning in the undercarriage area. I put it down to the new shower gel I'd bought locally. The next day I bought a different brand...with the same result. It took me ages to realise what was causing the problem. Throughout the day I was rubbing Tiger Balm on my mosquito bites and had the stuff all over my fingers. Lesson learned.
 
a long, long time ago (when I was just a skinny, long-haired idiot of a lad) I worked for a ferry company in it's Catering Office. Some chillies had been delivered and left with us as the stores were closed. A lovely young girl who worked in the office came in, saw the chillies in a box on the desk, and asked "what are these?"
"Baby Cucumbers" came the reply (from whom I cannot say 🙄 <fx: whistles tunelessly>).
Before we could say "Nooooooo!" she'd picked one up, chomped half of it and was chewing like a good 'un.
Then it hit. 😱
A gobful of masticated green napalm flew from her mouth.
That's when she discovered that baby cucumbers weren't as innocent and cute as they sounded and we discovered that she knew some pretty interesting words!
 
I have some chillis growing in a pot in my garden at the mo. Just waitig for them to turn red so we can try them.
 
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