worried mum

[seaview]

Hello everyone!
Mother of a 18 year old son with Type 1 diagnosed aged 16. The first 6 months he was looking after his diabetes with my help and support he was doing okay.He started to get resentful and arguments started as i was asking had he checked and taken his insulin it became a bone of contension. He has stopped checking blood sugars regularly sometimes only a few times a week. I carb count all his meals for him when he is at home says he has taken his insulin when he hasnt. His night time insulin sometimes he goes to bed with out taking it. Will go out with friends for food or snacks and no checking or taking insulin.Have tried talking but ends up in a argument and him walking out. When we go to see his healthcare nurse he tells her he has forgotten his monitor. Dont know what to do so worried and stressed about it feel like crying every day. Any help and i would be very grateful.

 

[rebrascora]

Hi and welcome

I am so sorry to read of your situation and cannot begin to imagine how worrying and frustrating it must be (it has been hard enough for me to deal with my own condition), but you can also kind of understand how difficult it must be for teenagers to cope with diabetes as well as becoming an adult. I am sure there must be quite a few parents who have been through this problem to a greater or lesser extent and hopefully have some tips for you. Maybe search the parenting section or post a question there. Have you spoken to the DSN. They must be aware that this happens with teenagers and hopefully be able to offer some advice or reassurance that it is just a phase that he will grow out of. Do you have a local Diabetes group where you could perhaps meet other parents. What about a Constant Glucose Monitoring System (CGM) they are not cheap but can be set to send you a message when BG is too high or too low. Not ideal if he will not take insulin when he needs it but at least you would know what his levels were like and maybe a high tech gadget might give him a focus on his condition.

I'm so sorry I can't be of more help but hopefully someone will respond here or on the parenting section who has been through it and can give you the benefit of their experience.
Best of luck

 

[Flower]

Hello seaview and welcome to the forum🙂

I'm sorry you are so worried about your son and his diabetes. As someone who lived through that transition from child to adult albeit about 35 years back it is a very turbulent time to get through for all concerned. but things do improve.

What clinic is he attending? Is he still seen by the paediatric team? There are some excellent Young adults clinics at certain hospitals or as an 18 year old he can be seen at an adult clinic. The young adult clinics deal with the age group 18-30 ish and it could be a good thing to meet others dealing with the same challenges and just chat about life/diabetes and hear how they deal with things or get some tips on how to deal with issues. This information is about moving from paediatrics https://www.diabetes.org.uk/guide-to-diabetes/young-adults/moving-clinics.

Is he wanting to learn to drive? He will need good records on his glucose meter and test regularly to hold a licence and that could be a positive way of encouraging him to start to care. Does he have any other people his age also dealing with Type 1 he could chat to?

It is a challenging time of life, growing up pushing the boundaries and I know how angry I was having diabetes always there. Things will improve and if he can go to a clinic more structured for his age group that might help things along - (that's assuming he's still seen by paediatrics). I wish you both well.

 

[Drummer]

Although it seems impossible not to argue with teenagers of any sort I'd advise against it - though dropping a few things into his thoughts might have some effect - like not being able to drive a car, the possibility of his sight deteriorating due to damage to his small blood vessels - oh - and erectile dysfunction might get his attention. He is legally an adult now, so in the adult health care system, I assume - maybe he needs a man to man talk from someone.