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Totally embarrassed - burnt out

A

Author23

New Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Type 1
Hi guys

I was tempted to write this anonymously - but at the end of the day, nobody knows me in real life anyway (that I'm aware of).

I have had diabetes for almost 20 years. At first I was fine (type one). The last few years have become so much harder. I'm finding the needles harder than ever (it's totally blocked any love of ANY food I used to have). I eat because I need to if I want to stay alive - enjoy it? NEVER.

I feel as though keeping an eye on my blood sugars is like having a third, fourth and fifth job which you can't ever clock on from. I'm tired all the time (until the last couple of weeks I was doing so much better than I have for a long time). I have, for so many reasons (including consistently being told I'm too fat - 8 stone at 4 ft 11 - I'm within my recommended BMI.

I guess the word for how I feel is burned out ... but I'm too frightened to tell my doctor that. Will they tell me to 'get a grip' which I'm trying to do. I'm doing what I have to, crying while I'm doing it but not missing my needles (YET). I'm so scared they'll just tell me I'm stupid. I've found walking is the one thing that helps with the way I'm feeling. At one point I was told, "You need to do 2000 steps every hour for 20 hours a day ... you're awake so it won't be hard." It's exhausting. Am I being silly? Should I admit how I'm feeling to my doctor? I just don't want them to think I'm being a baby. I have just broken my shoulder (well, last November) and the pain is off the scale. the surgeon does not want to operate (even though I'm in target) because I'm diabetic. "Look, nobody ever died from the pain of a broken shoulder- but they did from having surgery. " Cheers for that! I'm having OTHER surgery on the 1st April. This s so tough ... I'm sorry. I guess I'm having a wak moment.

Hope you're all OK
 
Yes, you should tell how you are feeling and get some support. If your doctor calls you stupid then they are a bad professional and a bad person, in my opinion. Burnout from diabetes management is not unheard of, because as you said, it can feel like a full time job!

I hope it gets better x
 
Yes, speak to your doctor, but also give your DSN a call. Burnout is a real and horrible thing. I had it a few years ago and it was unbearable. My advice is to make things simple for yourself: eat the same breakfast and lunches every day to avoid the need to carb count.

Also, remove yourself from the idiot who told you you had to walk 2000 each hour for 20 hours a day!! That’s rubbish!

I’d also consider taking some Vitamin D (a deficiency can cause tiredness) and maybe having some blood tests at your doctor’s just to check all the normal things are ok.
 
Hi @Author23 sorry you are having a rough time at the moment, I think most of us do at some point or another, so you are not alone.
Yes for sure tell your doctor how you feel, that's important to do so.

May I suggest that when you go and see your doctor, you take a friend with you for support.

I can assure you, you are not being stupid, silly of a baby, Diabetes is real and can carry mental health issues with it, which should be treated seriously by any HCP.

Definitely don't be frightened to tell your doctor exactly how you feel, in fact it's important that you do.

As I said, take a friend with you, for moral support.

Take care
Alan
 
Oh bless you you’re dealing with a lot. Yes diabetes burnout is a thing. One of the recommendations from our kid’s psychologist was to take back some of the work from him, things like carb counting (putting it on a note or WhatsApp so he’s not having to remember the number either) and supporting him in non diabetes things so that he’s less exhausted generally. If you have family that can help you do things like that then ask them for help and support or otherwise as has been suggested simplify your meals so you’re not having to think about the carb count.

Pain is exhausting. Talk to the doctor about how it’s impacting your life and the knock on effects on your diabetes. There may be some pain management that they can help with or it may be that the GP can advocate for you with the surgeon.

I don’t know how old you are but it can be worth talking about hormones and seeing if some boosting of your oestrogen levels might help as perimenopause is known to make us more tired and can also impact how we feel pain.

Have you considered an antidepressant too? It can take the edge off your emotions and just ease things a little. That doesn’t mean that it’s all in your head or that your struggles aren’t real just that you might need a helping hand with coping.

Mention your fatigue. This can be caused by all sorts of things and some simple blood tests may be appropriate.

The suggestion to take someone with you when you see the doctor is good too as it can give you some comfort. They can also remind you if you forget things. Otherwise you can write everything down and hand it to the doctor for them to read - I did this before I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia as I got upset any time I talked about it and I wouldn’t have been able to get all the details out.


Oh and ease up on your BG control just a bit if that helps take some of the pressure off.
 
As others have said above, Diabetes Burnout is a very real thing and hard. Managing diabetes is a full time job on top of all the other things we need to do. Do talk to your doctor. It took me a long while before I chose to ask for help when I reached burnout.

On a practical point of view, what needles are you using for your injections. There are some that are finer than others, and have shorter needles. I started on 8mm needles and ended up with lots of bruises. These were reduced to 4mm which were standard.

Do also contact your DSN. They will have helped many people who go through burnout (and you will get through this but help is good is invaluable). In the last few years Ihave used the new hybrid Closed loop system and that has removed a large amount of the burden. There is still the work in setting up the pump and managing it, but I now have times when I completely ignore my Diabetes and just let the pump and sensor have a chat and do my corrections for me whilst I get on with what I want to do.

Be kind to yourself. Do not be embarrassed about asking for help.
Keep in contact on here. We ‘Get it’. A good rant on here is always helpful.
 
100% you need to tell your doctor this, if need be print out this post and hand it over to them if you don't feel able to get the words out in person. I'm always asked at my annual review how I'm feeling as even depression can be caused by Diabets (fun thing Diabetes isnt it)!

Let us know how you get on and what the Doctor said.

🙂
 
So sorry you are having such a rough time at the moment @Author23 with your diabetes and pain from your shoulder.
Definitely speak to your DSN about your diabetes burnout before it gets worse, for your mental and physical health.
Living with constant pain is exhausting and magnifies any other difficulties because you can't rest properly. Ask for help from your doctor. You are NOT wasting his or her time.
I hope you can get some help and support sooner rather than later. Feel free to rant on here if it helps. Nobody is judging you.
 
Speak up, if your GP doesn't care try someone else. They should care.
We are always here, you are not alone. You will have better days, but for now focus on what you can do, small goals, are big wins when completed.

As others have said pumps and especially HCLs really help with the mental load, burnout can be a reason to be moved onto one, as can your relationship with food.
 
Sorry you're going through this, it sounds like you're having a rough time.

I just want to echo what @Inka has already said - whoever told you to walk 2000 steps an hour for 20 hours a day is speaking absolute nonsense. You don't need that extra pressure!

Let us know how you get on.
 
Thank you so much, guys. You've made me feel better just listening to your replies (I have almost no sight but nothing to do with diabetes - I fell down 14 stairs and hit my head at the bottom (didn't hit a single step on the way down. The force caused a bleed to my brain - and the hospital 'didn't think' to check my head with an MRI (even asking why didn't I 'remind' them!!!! I mean, excuse me! I had a concussion ... I shouldn't have to tell them how to do their job!

I have a call booked with the GP on Thursday so I'll mention the burn out then. Thanks for all the reassurance. And for all of you who said I will have happier days ahead and will get through this.
 
Hi @Author23

I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time. Burnout is very real & hard to find a way through when the thing that’s causing it is the very thing you have to do.

Please ask for help with it, if you’ve got a DSN I’d contact them as they will have helped others in similar situations- including me. We are so good at doing diabetes because we have to that unless someone knows we have it no one notices the effort it takes and the mental toll it can take. It’s ’just’ diabetes or ‘only’ diabetes but however long we’ve dealt with it burnout can happen. Juggling everything we have to juggle is such hard work & sometimes it just seems too much to manage. No one should tell you to get a grip when you’ve managed for so long nor should you ever feel embarrassed about needing to ask for help or talk about it. Diabetes is relentlessly tough.

I try to simplify things when I really can’t face carb counting or extended boluses & all the other stuff. Like @Inka I have a simple menu I rotate & know the carb values of so hopefully I know what bolus should keep me ok. It helps to simplify things so diabetes doesn’t feel such a mental battle.

I hope you get some good help and glad writing about it on here has helped.
 
Just got some blood work back from the hospital (in prep for my eye operation. My thyroid is up - not massively but I match symptom for symptom with thyroid problems so my GP is going to check me out. Said the depression, shakiness (hypos), hypers, and most importantly, the vision loss, is potentially easily treated. He said I'd suffer depression less if I was feeling well. OH SO TRUE. I'm SICK of hurting everywhere. I woke up to a high blood sugar this morning. AGAIN. You guys have given me strength to go on. Thank you.
 
I am sorry to hear you are feeling so awful. I cannot imagine what it is like to be Type I. I think you should talk to your doctor. I cannot believe they will think you are stupid. They certainly should not tell you to "get a grip." You cannot help how you are feeling. Maybe they could arrange for you to talk to someone.
 
Author23 said:
Thank you so much, guys. You've made me feel better just listening to your replies (I have almost no sight but nothing to do with diabetes - I fell down 14 stairs and hit my head at the bottom (didn't hit a single step on the way down. The force caused a bleed to my brain - and the hospital 'didn't think' to check my head with an MRI (even asking why didn't I 'remind' them!!!! I mean, excuse me! I had a concussion ... I shouldn't have to tell them how to do their job!

I have a call booked with the GP on Thursday so I'll mention the burn out then. Thanks for all the reassurance. And for all of you who said I will have happier days ahead and will get through this.
Click to expand...
My God, this is so awful to read. I am so sorry this happened to you. I worked in the NHS for most of my working life, the last 23 of them in a hospital. It is unbelievable that they should say you should have reminded them. It certainly is not your job to tell them what they are supposed to do. They should know. It is what they are trained for!!!!! Sorry if this sounds like a rant. I just feel so sad for you.
 
Author23 said:
Just got some blood work back from the hospital (in prep for my eye operation. My thyroid is up - not massively but I match symptom for symptom with thyroid problems so my GP is going to check me out. Said the depression, shakiness (hypos), hypers, and most importantly, the vision loss, is potentially easily treated. He said I'd suffer depression less if I was feeling well. OH SO TRUE. I'm SICK of hurting everywhere. I woke up to a high blood sugar this morning. AGAIN. You guys have given me strength to go on. Thank you.
Click to expand...
Just wondering if the thyroid problems may be making you feel worse. I am no expert on thyroid but I believe it can cause problems as it is to do with hormonal balance. Glad things seem to be getting a bit more sorted for you.

The people here are fantastic. I have only ever been pre-diabetic so far, back to normal at present. Thanks to people here I managed to get my readings to normal after being advised how bad my so called "healthy diet" actually was. So pleased you are getting support both here and with your GP.
 
Hey there @Author23 , first of all, I just want to say - you are not being silly, and you are absolutely not alone in feeling this way. Diabetes is relentless, and burnout is real. The fact that you’re still pushing through, even when it feels unbearable, shows just how incredibly strong you are. But strength doesn’t mean you have to suffer in silence. You deserve support.
I’m so glad you’ve got a call booked with your GP - bringing up the burnout is a really important step, and I hope they listen to you properly. You’re dealing with so much, and it’s completely understandable to feel exhausted by it all. It’s not just the constant demands of diabetes; you’re also managing severe pain, sight loss from a completely avoidable medical oversight, and the impact of your injury. That’s a lot, and I’m honestly in awe of how you’re keeping going.
Your thyroid results are definitely interesting - if that’s been adding to the exhaustion, emotional toll, and blood sugar swings, getting it treated could make a huge difference. I really hope it brings some relief because you deserve to feel better. And as Maz2 has said - it could very well be linked to hormonal balance and how you're currently feeling.
It’s great to hear that the replies here have helped even a little <3 You’re part of this community, and we’re all rooting for you. Keep holding onto the things that help (like your walks), and don’t be afraid to lean on people when you need to. Sending strength and support. :star:
 
Sorry to hear what a tough time you’ve been having @Author23

Do let your clinic know how you have been feeling. Some hospitals have specialist psychological support and counselling which can be accessed by people who are struggling with diabetes burnout and diabetes distress.

What is diabetes distress and burnout?

Diabetes distress is what some people feel when they’re overwhelmed by the relentlessness of diabetes. This can lead to diabetes burnout. The way you react to things and the emotions you feel can vary for different people. You might feel frustrated, guilty, sad or worried. Sometimes you might...
www.diabetes.org.uk www.diabetes.org.uk
 
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