The perception that type two diabetes is not an issue

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Stoobey

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Relationship to Diabetes
Type 2
Hey All,

I hope you are all well, I'd just like to initiate a conversation, which makes me feel paranoid, but feel free to chip in to say I'm stupid.

Diabetes was my fault, I got fat, I drank too many so called healthy, but full of sugar drinks, plus I had a heavy carb diet, I take full responsibility for that. I lost weight, got healthy and put it into remission three years ago and I strive to keep it in remission.

I do struggle at times, I probably drink too much (No probably, I do), I eat too much cheese, but my numbers are very good, I rarely go over 5.5 even two hours after eating. It's just I feel I am dead weight with my friends, they don't believe diabetes is an issue, oh you can eat pizza, it won't hurt every once in a while....

You can see it in the faces, the rolling of the eyes, They want to go for a high carb meal, I just ask to see the menu and I'm being difficult, let's all get a round of chips, oh you have to be different. Does anyone else feel like this? Am I wrong? I just hate it, the guilt from not being normal..

Before people say it, they are good friends, but it's just like, diabetes has been so downgraded as an illness, maybe it's me being stupid
 
First up, congratulations for putting D into remission. Second, no, its not you being stupid. You have made a major change to your life and worked hard to stay healthy and that should be applauded. For people who haven't been diagnosed its hard for them to understand what its like but its not very nice for you. Could you make some joke/comment whenever something is said? Or every so often, have a treat.
I'm type 1 so i have insulin to cover meals but i still get comments if i take time looking at menus and mentally working out carbs before i choose, or asked "should you be having that?".
Its all down to educating people as and when you can.
Enjoy your nights out with your mates and tell them (in a jokey comment maybe) why you are doing it. You never know, it may inform them enough to think about their own diets. Take care.
 
Why don't go over 5.5 after eating?
Are you in remission, or on very tight diet control?
I reversed mine, I do eat chips and pizza, (not always, normally I eat a Mediterranean diet), and I'll see rises to 8, which is a normal response.
I do watch my weight, and if I keep it off it seems to work for me.
 
I always walk around meals, does wonders for blood sugar, for example yesterday I tested 4.5 before breakfast, had my typical shredded wheat, hazelnut milk morning meal, then went for a walk, I was 4.7 two hours later.

Maybe I am too strict and am being stupid, sorry, felt a bit down last night
 
Stoobey said:
I always walk around meals, does wonders for blood sugar, for example yesterday I tested 4.5 before breakfast, had my typical shredded wheat, hazelnut milk morning meal, then went for a walk, I was 4.7 two hours later.

Maybe I am too strict and am being stupid, sorry, felt a bit down last night
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Have you tried a slice of pizza, or chips recently?
I'm not saying force it down if you don't like it, but just to see how your body handles it?
 
I don't handle the mental health side of diabetes well, even with good numbers, If I ever get a bad reading I really beat myself up and for me, a bad reading is anything over 6......

I know, pathetic, I should be grateful for what I have
 
Stoobey said:
I don't handle the mental health side of diabetes well, even with good numbers, If I ever get a bad reading I really beat myself up and for me, a bad reading is anything over 6......

I know, pathetic, I should be grateful for what I have
Click to expand...

That is a common issue with diabetes, not pathetic.
Unfortunately some internet sites and online "experts" do promote sub normal levels as better, but I took the stance that normal people with normal levels don't get any diabetic complications, indeed, a normal insulin response can see peaks well over 8.
The "normal" reading is also an average of a standard population, in reality the response gets worse with age for everyone as well.
Hopefully others can give better advice on this, as it's not as uncommon as you'd think.
 
You're being far too hard on yourself @Stoobey - your numbers look excellent to me. There's a genetic element for T2 (and T1 I believe), as you can't outrun your genetics, you need to manage it by being careful with your diet and weight. Tell them you'd rather stay well and not roll the "complications dice" by eating things you don't want to.

When your friends roll their eyes, can you explain what diabetes could do to you if you'd not lost weight and got remission? I know T2 can be slow moving, but it still has the potential to do bad things. I can rattle off the complications; blindness, amputations, nerve damage, strokes etc if people try and pressure me to have food I know I shouldn't be eating.
I think the general public don't think it's serious because their aunty Mabel had diabetes for years and ate 5 cakes every day and didn't have any problems, but they may not know that she had a toe amputated, or had nerve pain or whatever.

Ask them if that's what they want for you? I know it's a bit guilt trippy, but that's the thing, they should be celebrating the efforts you made to lose weight and not trying to lead you astray. I know that they mean well, but encouraging you to eat chips isn't helpful at all.
Tell them you appreciate their concern, but you're happy eating what you're eating, and chips are a bit bland anyway.
 
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Stoobey said:
I don't handle the mental health side of diabetes well, even with good numbers, If I ever get a bad reading I really beat myself up and for me, a bad reading is anything over 6......

I know, pathetic, I should be grateful for what I have
Click to expand...
I echo what Travellor says. A normal BG level for non diabetics is here on the British Heart Foundation website . It says:

"For most people without diabetes, normal blood sugar levels are:
  • between 4 and to 6 mmol/L before meals
  • less than 8 mmol/L two hours after eating."

    So I wouldn't worry at all about your 6 mmol/L after a meal, it's probably better than your friends' level.
 
yes, sorry, was just having a mini breakdown, it does help to have an outlet for these kind of things, I've also just booked a holiday, with friends to Iceland, later in the year, so I'm kind of panicking about what I eat, as it seems to be a very carb heavy diet 🙂
 
Stoobey said:
yes, sorry, was just having a mini breakdown, it does help to have an outlet for these kind of things, I've also just booked a holiday, with friends to Iceland, later in the year, so I'm kind of panicking about what I eat, as it seems to be a very carb heavy diet 🙂
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Feel free to vent, that's what we're here for!
Iceland's meant to have some lovely fish dishes, and lamb, plus rye bread, and I'm sure other stuff too. There's an article here and it all looks delicious to me [except I read down a bit further and they also eat puffins and whale, which doesn't make me happy at all!], you just need to be mindful of what you eat, as you are at home. Hope you have a lovely holiday, I've heard it's a beautiful place.
 
Stoobey said:
yes, sorry, was just having a mini breakdown, it does help to have an outlet for these kind of things, I've also just booked a holiday, with friends to Iceland, later in the year, so I'm kind of panicking about what I eat, as it seems to be a very carb heavy diet 🙂
Click to expand...
I've been, there are options.
Fish is always safe.
If you're eating out, pretty much the same as here.
Bread and stew tend to be the go to's, and all the other usual food, but it's easy enough to go for things like the salad options, or whatever you'd eat out here.
Definitely try the dried fish, sold as a snack in any supermarket.
Again though, a holiday is a time to relax, and a few days eating what you don't normally do isn't going to cause any major issue.
It has been said by some "diabetes doesn't take a holiday" but equally sometimes we do need to take a holiday from diabetes, just like anything else.
 
Yes I think you are being too hard on yourself too. I remember going out with a group of lads to a real ale pub. I'm not a fan of real ale so I had a John Smiths beer. This put the group into shock and they were telling me I can't have a John Smiths in a real ale pub. There was a lot of pressure, but I told them that since I'd grown up, I made my own decisions. Much to their disgust, I had a second John Smiths and it was lovely. I'm guessing your friends just don't understand your diabetes and often groups want to all 'do the same thing' which can pressure individuals.

Maybe if you told them how it makes you feel? If they are good friends they will understand and stop the ragging.

Best of luck

Steve
 
or in other words 'Why can't you be more like me????'

Answer: because I'm not you
 
Hi. Sorry to hear you are having difficulty in going out for meals with friends. I am really lucky in that mine are so switched on that they look at the online menu for low carb options before even suggesting a place. I guess I am rather blessed with thoughtful and considerate friends and family. If you had a nut allergy or whatever I am sure they would be much more understanding as it of course has a much more immediate and life threatening impact but in many respects following a low carb way of eating is more difficult because it is not just one food you are trying to avoid and most places don't specifically cater to it, and of course there is much more self restraint involved, which makes their attitude even more difficult for you to cope with, because they are pushing you towards doing something that you might actually want to do, rather than the John Smith's scenario with @picitup who clearly didn't want to drink the real ale.

I am myself a bit of an all or nothing person so I can sort of understand you wanting tight control of your diabetes and keeping a short rein on your diet to do that, but you do have to find balance and I think we are probably all in agreement that you probably need to loosen up a little. I think @sarahb83 had a similar mindset and like you worked really hard to get remission but was a bit paranoid about losing it again and had a holiday to Florida (Disneyworld) booked which was causing her a great deal of anxiety. I think it might help to read her account of her holiday and subsequent journey back onto the straight and narrow to hopefully gain some inspiration.....

I hope you have a great time in Iceland and don't be frightened to relax a bit and find some balance. If high BG levels are making you anxious, leave your BG meter at home and have a holiday from your diabetes and like @sarahb83 just get back on track with it when you get home.
 
Forgot to add that you have done amazing well to achieve what you have done so don't lose sight of that and a week or two of holiday is not going to set you right back to the beginning, so if you can just relax and enjoy your holiday you will come home more invigorated to get back on track again. This is what holidays are for.... taking a break from the everyday and treating ourselves.
 
Stoobey said:
Hey All,

I hope you are all well, I'd just like to initiate a conversation, which makes me feel paranoid, but feel free to chip in to say I'm stupid.

Diabetes was my fault, I got fat, I drank too many so called healthy, but full of sugar drinks, plus I had a heavy carb diet, I take full responsibility for that. I lost weight, got healthy and put it into remission three years ago and I strive to keep it in remission.

I do struggle at times, I probably drink too much (No probably, I do), I eat too much cheese, but my numbers are very good, I rarely go over 5.5 even two hours after eating. It's just I feel I am dead weight with my friends, they don't believe diabetes is an issue, oh you can eat pizza, it won't hurt every once in a while....

You can see it in the faces, the rolling of the eyes, They want to go for a high carb meal, I just ask to see the menu and I'm being difficult, let's all get a round of chips, oh you have to be different. Does anyone else feel like this? Am I wrong? I just hate it, the guilt from not being normal..

Before people say it, they are good friends, but it's just like, diabetes has been so downgraded as an illness, maybe it's me being stupid
Click to expand...
Really well done on getting your diabetes into remission, you've done, and are doing, so well. I don't think you're being stupid at all. I have a similar problem when it comes to drinking alcohol and some members of my family. They don't understand why I don't want to drink or, even if I do, that I limit my intake. It is tough when you're made to feel like you're being difficult when all you're trying to do is look after your health. You are allowed treats but if you don't feel comfortable having them then that's totally okay. I don't know if it's something you feel like you could do but it might be a good idea to talk to one of your mates about how you're feeling so they can have your back and support you when you're in a group with the others. I hope you have a great holiday!
 
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