School avoidance and newly diagnosed Type 1

[Alinambarrie]

Hello everyone,

My 12 ur old has been suffering from emotional based school avoidance (or so we thought) since November 2023. She had completely stopped going to school and was having panic attacks and suffering greatly from lack of self esteem.
Then last week after noticing some signs, we went to hospital and discovered she had T1 diabetes.
My question is if anyone else has suffered the same multi faceted situation, whether you feel that the underlying diabetes was the trigger for school avoidance. And of course, have things improved at all since making the discovery or have the school avoidance problems increased?

I presume these are all linked to some degree, but I am curious if this is a trend that is appearing in our kids with undiscovered health problems?

 

[Thebearcametoo]

Hi and welcome. That sounds hard all round.

Neither of my kids (16 & 13) go to school as they’ve always been home educated. Both of mine are neuro diverse in one form or another and ND kids often find school difficult. Then if you add in a chronic health condition it all gets harder. (I don’t know if your kid is neuro diverse but it’s very common in school refusing kids.).

If you’ve not come across the work of Naomi Fisher before she writes books and does talks about school refusal etc which can help to understand the behaviour.

A new diabetes diagnosis is a lot. It took us months to get our head around it all and there were emotional struggles - still are 5 years in. And when you add hormones into the mix too that all gets a lot.

Here to listen. Happy to share my experience.

 

[Satan’s little helper]

Hello everyone,

My 12 ur old has been suffering from emotional based school avoidance (or so we thought) since November 2023. She had completely stopped going to school and was having panic attacks and suffering greatly from lack of self esteem.
Then last week after noticing some signs, we went to hospital and discovered she had T1 diabetes.
My question is if anyone else has suffered the same multi faceted situation, whether you feel that the underlying diabetes was the trigger for school avoidance. And of course, have things improved at all since making the discovery or have the school avoidance problems increased?

I presume these are all linked to some degree, but I am curious if this is a trend that is appearing in our kids with undiscovered health problems?

Hello, & welcome. Sorry to read about your child’s recent diagnosis of T1.
Could your child be bullied at her school?

 

[Alinambarrie]

Hello, & welcome. Sorry to read about your child’s recent diagnosis of T1.
Could your child be bullied at her school?

Hi, I don't believe so. School split the year group and she was separated from the friends she had made close bonds with. After that she seemed miserable and lost, leading to panic attacks and inability to attend anymore. It's possible that this was linked to the unknown diabetes leaving her tired and emotionally drained. I asked about bullying but she said nothing had happened.

 

[Alinambarrie]

Hi and welcome. That sounds hard all round.

Neither of my kids (16 & 13) go to school as they’ve always been home educated. Both of mine are neuro diverse in one form or another and ND kids often find school difficult. Then if you add in a chronic health condition it all gets harder. (I don’t know if your kid is neuro diverse but it’s very common in school refusing kids.).

If you’ve not come across the work of Naomi Fisher before she writes books and does talks about school refusal etc which can help to understand the behaviour.

A new diabetes diagnosis is a lot. It took us months to get our head around it all and there were emotional struggles - still are 5 years in. And when you add hormones into the mix too that all gets a lot.

Here to listen. Happy to share my experience.

Thank you for your response. I'd been looking into neuro diversity and there are some possible traits present. It's definitely a lot to take in, reminds you how life can change so much in a split second!
Thanks for the heads up about Naomi Fisher, I may have watched one of her seminars. I've been exploring home learning as a possibility going forward...

 

[Inka]

Hi, I don't believe so. School split the year group and she was separated from the friends she had made close bonds with. After that she seemed miserable and lost, leading to panic attacks and inability to attend anymore. It's possible that this was linked to the unknown diabetes leaving her tired and emotionally drained. I asked about bullying but she said nothing had happened.

Splitting her up from her friends could have had quite a big effect. Have you talked to the school about the possibility of her being put back with her friends?

 

[Thebearcametoo]

Thank you for your response. I'd been looking into neuro diversity and there are some possible traits present. It's definitely a lot to take in, reminds you how life can change so much in a split second!
Thanks for the heads up about Naomi Fisher, I may have watched one of her seminars. I've been exploring home learning as a possibility going forward...

Keep talking to the school. If a simple thing like swapping her back to be with her friends would help then they could try that but it may be that the anxiety is too much even for that. A good school will have strategies to help her and keep her on their roll and you should be able to access some tutors which may help bridge the gap.

I am very pro home ed as a choice but very anti being forced into it because of lack of support from schools.

 

[Docb]

I see that @Alinambarrie is posting from Indonesia. No problem, but being UK based, most of our members replies will reflect the education system in the UK. There may be differences in how things are done there.

 

[Lily123]

If she’s been split from her friends,then that’s going to make things more difficult.

Do you know if she’s struggling with her schoolwork at all? Stress from that combined with Type 1 on top could’ve caused this.

Does she have any adults at school she can go to during the school day if she needs it?

 

[trophywench]

I was about to say 'surely her paediatric diabetes clinic has a psychologist to consult with' - then became aware that you're not in the UK.

 

[Alinambarrie]

I see that @Alinambarrie is posting from Indonesia. No problem, but being UK based, most of our members replies will reflect the education system in the UK. There may be differences in how things are done there.

Hi, not in Indonesia I am in Cumbria. Apparently there is a problem with some sites that use location maps and it says Kendal Indonesia. Not sure why but am very much in the UK!

 

[Alinambarrie]

Splitting her up from her friends could have had quite a big effect. Have you talked to the school about the possibility of her being put back with her friends?

They are reluctant to make any changes until she returns to school. They seem to have a chicken or the egg approach which is completely avoiding the solution

 

[Inka]

They are reluctant to make any changes until she returns to school. They seem to have a chicken or the egg approach which is completely avoiding the solution

That doesn’t sound very good. Have you had a meeting with the senior leadership team? You could come from the angle that the combination of being split from her friends and then the diagnosis of a serious medical condition has affected her MH and an easy way for the school to support her and enable her phased return would be to put her back with her friends.

 

[Alinambarrie]

I was about to say 'surely her paediatric diabetes clinic has a psychologist to consult with' - then became aware that you're not in the UK.

Yes the diabetes psychology team have been great, even though it's early days. There is also a pilot scheme working in my area with some great people trying to get kids back into school. The problem is that the council inclusions officer has the mindset of truancy over mental health and is leading the charge with the school. I have begged for help since this all started and have been refused any educational resources from school on the council's advice. I have begged for the teachers to send her a little email, reassuring her she can catch up and what topics they are currently doing, but that is unsustainable apparently and they didn't bother. In Year 7 my daughter was blossoming and finally gaining confidence in maths. Attendance was 99%. Today she has turned her back on education and even says she doesn't know how to tell the time. She has turned from model student into someone who resents education. If she had been with her friends I feel this would have been a different situation, so the wall to climb is very high now but I am determined to get school to take responsibility for their actions and rectify it.
Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant!

 

[Thebearcametoo]

Does the school have a welfare room? I have friends who have had school refusing kids and part of getting them back was to go into the building but just to spend time working independently in the welfare room. Then adding back in the lessons they like with the rest of the time in welfare. Or only doing part time. The school and council should be flexible. And if she really can’t cope with school there should be options to have tutors, use the hospital school team, or to have funding for a private school (smaller classes can be less overwhelming). Nothing happens quickly and you do need to keep pressure on the school and council but there are pathways to get her support.

 

[Docb]

Hi, not in Indonesia I am in Cumbria. Apparently there is a problem with some sites that use location maps and it says Kendal Indonesia. Not sure why but am very much in the UK!

Thanks for putting that straight @Alinambarrie - the IP lookup function available to moderators is very useful for weeding out spam and making sure that people from different parts of the world are not talking at cross purposes but now and then it does give some silly results!

 

[a live]

Hello everyone,

My 12 ur old has been suffering from emotional based school avoidance (or so we thought) since November 2023. She had completely stopped going to school and was having panic attacks and suffering greatly from lack of self esteem.
Then last week after noticing some signs, we went to hospital and discovered she had T1 diabetes.
My question is if anyone else has suffered the same multi faceted situation, whether you feel that the underlying diabetes was the trigger for school avoidance. And of course, have things improved at all since making the discovery or have the school avoidance problems increased?

I presume these are all linked to some degree, but I am curious if this is a trend that is appearing in our kids with undiscovered health problems?

Hi just the same when i got diagnosed didn't want to go to school bot my mother explained me that i want gain anything of it and i should explain my friends about diabetic and how it fells taking care of your life
wishing your 12 year one ease days at school and long happy years still to come🙂😉