Newbie to the site. 9yrs with T1!

[hahopson]

Hi!

I officially hate diabetes. Like passionately hate the condition. I suffer from anxiety and depression. Doesn't help I have a benign brain cyst too so when I am suffering from a migraine I can't eat so always running high. Last hba1c was 12.0 lowest it's been in a few years but still, the GP and Diabetic team always moan.
I have two young children to care for as I am a single parent so they can't deal with my hypos or if I am suffering from a migraine they don't understand how to help at the moment.
I rarely test and eat at the correct time, 90% of the time my bloods are high because I just don't want to deal with the hypos.
Within the last few months, myself and the ex have been seeing social workers and case workers due to my anxiety and stress levels and I have seen the mental health crisis team multiple times. They won't put me on anti-depressants due to me needing to see a crisis team (mental health, who is a waste of time within out area due to cut backs and lack of services, tell me I can't have my insulin about the house due to the threat the cause, which yes a few times and currently I have said I don't want to be here anymore and would inject all my pens), but when I am on a good day I need the medication so I feel they can do what they want but not see the bigger picture.
My son also has a heart defect so he is waiting for surgery and I'm worried about him most of the time!
I feel a huge burden on the NHS for the clinics I just rage at or the amount of insulin which I need but at the end of the day isn't curing me is a waste of NHS money!

 

[Davein]

Hi

Having diabetes can be hard. You have dealt with it for 9 years. I have other medical conditions and trust me have sometimes reached the point when I felt I did not want to take any more. Like you and many others I hate being diabetic, I hate being called a diabetic but the choice is you either let it totally control your life or you decide to take control of it and the only way to do that is to eat the right foods and test regularly to bring your blood glucose levels down and get them reasonably stable. We are fortunate in this country in that we have a free health service. Treating people for their illnesses is not a waste of NHS resources. You have a right to free medication, use it appropriately and your health should improve. Look for the positives in your life, starting with your two youngsters, they need their mum to love and look after them. There are others on this site always willing to give you their advice and experiences in dealing with this awful condition.

 

[New-journey]

Hi!

I officially hate diabetes. Like passionately hate the condition. I suffer from anxiety and depression. Doesn't help I have a benign brain cyst too so when I am suffering from a migraine I can't eat so always running high. Last hba1c was 12.0 lowest it's been in a few years but still, the GP and Diabetic team always moan.
I have two young children to care for as I am a single parent so they can't deal with my hypos or if I am suffering from a migraine they don't understand how to help at the moment.
I rarely test and eat at the correct time, 90% of the time my bloods are high because I just don't want to deal with the hypos.
Within the last few months, myself and the ex have been seeing social workers and case workers due to my anxiety and stress levels and I have seen the mental health crisis team multiple times. They won't put me on anti-depressants due to me needing to see a crisis team (mental health, who is a waste of time within out area due to cut backs and lack of services, tell me I can't have my insulin about the house due to the threat the cause, which yes a few times and currently I have said I don't want to be here anymore and would inject all my pens), but when I am on a good day I need the medication so I feel they can do what they want but not see the bigger picture.
My son also has a heart defect so he is waiting for surgery and I'm worried about him most of the time!
I feel a huge burden on the NHS for the clinics I just rage at or the amount of insulin which I need but at the end of the day isn't curing me is a waste of NHS money!

I just want to send you hugs and please know you are not a burden to the NHS, you deserve all the medicine and help you need. I do hope you get the help you need and you start feeling better soon.