My head is mashed

[Silkman_Bob]

I am really sorry guys but I think I am cracking up. I started all this diabetes lark with so much positivity but that seems to have been drained out of me and I am doing is worrying about dying pretty much 24/7.

Part of the reason for this is the mixed messages I am getting from my GP. Now I am in awe of anyone who has chosen to help others as a vocation but this person really is playing with my head.

I went in 4/5 weeks ago and everything was great - results improving , everyone happy, he even shook hands with me and said well done!

This time I go (with no test results due) and he blunty says that he cannot see me hitting 40 (Im 28 now!) in one breath but in another that with good weight loss my diabetes is reversible?

My head is mashed big time - how am I meant to deal with this when I don't know what I am facing. This is making me more and more anxious and all I can think of is whether or not I will be here tomorrow, next week or next year.

My Mum and Dad both say lose weight, exercise and you will be fine - you will always have to watch yourself but other than that I will lead a healthy normal and long life. In other words, look after yourself and it wont make too much of a difference.

Sometimes the GP says something similar, sometimes he pretty much says the grim reaper is coming sooner than I ever imagined.

Sorry for the rant - my head is just everywhere at the moment and I just want to feel happy about things again (but obviously knowing what I am facing too.)

 

[Einstein]

Without knowing all the facts from your information I'll make a couple of assumptions, you're fairly newly diagnosed and are on diet and exercise control?

Emotions and the roller coaster ride, you're not alone here, we've all been there and we've all survived, even so, we still get wobbles from time to time, you'll read enough about them on this forum. At the time it is very real though.

With diabetes from time to time you need a good sized boot up your backside, this is simply because whatever management your diabetes takes it's a lifetime of control and regulation - balance. The boot motivates us when we become slack, not seeing the point to keeping such tight control.

That said a good many people in the medical profession aren't great communicators, or can change to the attack so quickly and perhaps without foundation... they can also speak in a tone of authority when their own knowledge is far from complete.

With the knowledge of what can be done today, diabetes can't be cured, it can be controlled, but still needs careful monitoring throughout our lives.
That said, it doesn't need to take over our lives, it will do in the early months after diagnosis, but soon we learn to live and cope with it.

Your GP may consider your weight loss isn't being effective enough or you're not doing enough exercise for his liking. This may be obvious in some by the physical appearence, however, the ultimate measure is how the six monthly HbA1C's measure up - they are the markers on the management and control of your diabetes. It's important you know this figure, at diagnosis, at your first test and after every test from then on. You can map your own successes and reflect on the times where your standard slips and use it to motivate you to return a better result in six months time.

Again, you didn't say why you were seeing your GP, if it was to do with continued problems/symptoms of diabetes, or perhaps the early stages of a diabetic complication. It may be because of seeing him aside of the routine review, that he made the comment in such a blunt way.

There are lots GPs and other healthcare professionals can do to assist all newly diagnosed diabetics and those of us with many years under our belts, things such as seeing a dietician for their thoughts and input on diet and excercise, to begin to set goals to head towards and to monitor your progress.

Some of the blame shouldn't be passed entirely onto the diabetic, but the GP should be considering what they have done for their patient.

These aren't luxuries that are postcode selected, training, dieticians, screening et-al are clearly defined in the national framework for diabetic care throughout England and Wales (I think Scotland is also under this framework).

It's down to them (your GP/PCT) to provide, but often it's not offered if you don't ask. So ask. If you need something you think your GP or the NHS provides but you're not being offered, ask for it.

Diabetic care in general practise is very patchy, many will have a diabetes specialist nurse - she will deem to tell you about diet etc. However, in my opinion there are people who do nothing but diet, who have trained for years in just that field. That is the person you need to see if you wish to plan a detailed review of where you're going right or wrong in what you're eating and doing.

At 28 there is no reason at all why you can't have a very long and healthy life. You need to take your part in making it happen. You're the hub in everything, if you're prescribed medication and don't take it, well there is only you to blame.

That said, you really need to stay clear of medication to control your diabetes for as long as is physically possible. But like to many people here, you can do it. You need to have the drive and desire.

Your fears are shared by many more people than you can imagine. Only you have the ability to ensure they remain as fears and never events.

 

[katie]

Your parents are right! If it is just type 2 diabetes you have then losing weight and controlling blood sugars is what you need to do and if you do this you will lead a perfectly normal life, not die before 40 🙄 I can only assume the GP means if you carry on as you are you will die young, he is probably using scare tactics to make you do something about your lifestyle (which you appear to be doing already, so they are pointless!).

 

[Steff]

hi there silkman the GP said to me when i was diagnosed do you want to see your little boy grow up at first i was disgusted he used my son that way but afterwards i understood he did it to wake me up and it worked,i can totally undersatnd your fears of dying ive thought of it myself and it aint nice , are you a religious man at all? I know its for some and not others but maybe if you have a local church you can visit and have a chat with the vicar just a thought. If you need to talk anytime just PM me x

 

[wallycorker]

Hi,

I'm a Type 2 myself and achieved a lot over the last twelve months.

The most important lesson that I have learnt is the importance of cutting back dramatically on the starchy carbohydrates that I eat - i.e. cereals, bread, potatoes mainly - but also rice and and pasta. Doing that leads to a very big and sudden lowering of blood glucose levels for most Type 2s.

As far as I am concerned, diet is the biggest factor and gives graet results - very quickly too. I've lost a lot of weight too and I'm certain that must have helped somewhere along the line but my improvement came along before I'd even lost any weight. As far as exercise is concerned, I'm certain that will help too but I do very little and certainly ought to do more. As I said previously, in my opinion, diet is the way to go!

Best wishes - John

 

[Northerner]

Hi Bob, sorry to hear your GP can't seem to make his mind up. It sounds to me as though, like Einstein says, he is a poor communicator and hs chosen an inappropriate time to try and frighten you when you feel you would benefit more from encouragement. It may be that he didn't take sufficient time to consider your own circumstances before speaking to you, or perhaps just failed to realise how conflicting and upsetting his words would be.

Keep the faith! There is every chance that you will live a long and healthy life if you take care to look after yourself. In time, you will come to realise that YOU know more than your GP about how best to control your diabetes, since it is you that lives with it day-by-day. Really, he can only advise when test results indicate that you need changes in medication, lifestyle etc. If he doesn't have any test results available to justify what he is saying, then trust your own feelings - if you know you have been doing well then you have every right to remain positive.

 

[LisaLQ]

Hiya Bob, no real advice to offer, as I'm a recently diagnosed type 2 too, but just wanted to say I know how confusing it all is and how you dont know what to expect, or who to believe, or what to do and you're not alone.

*hug*

 

[Vanessa]

Your parents are right! If it is just type 2 diabetes you have then losing weight and controlling blood sugars is what you need to do and if you do this you will lead a perfectly normal life, not die before 40 🙄 I can only assume the GP means if you carry on as you are you will die young, he is probably using scare tactics to make you do something about your lifestyle (which you appear to be doing already, so they are pointless!).

Katie - this gave me a wry smile when I read it. For many of us, losing weight and controlling blood sugars is a real day to day challenge and, irritating as it was, at least Bob-Silkman's GP cared enough (and was brave enough) to be blunt. Bob is 28 now and hopefully will be able to get his diabetes under control. I also hope that his diabetes was diagnosed early on and well before any damage was done - many Type 2s are not as lucky

My "perfectly normal life" still means watching every morsel I eat, coping with the guilt if I "sin" and trying to conjure up low calorie and low carb goodies that I can share with others - especially at this time of year. Fortunately I love cooking and adapting recipes so, for me, that is an enjoyable part of life. Not so keen on the exercise tho

 

[katie]

Sorry vanessa, i'm type 1 and even though I have hypos and have to watch what I eat etc, I still consider my life normal and don't panic about dying everyday, things could be hella worse - so that's what I meant about "perfectly normal life".

I get what the GP was doing, and mine has scared me before by using the "I don't want you back here in five years, blind" and it worked. I was merely reassuring bob.