Is this how I'll be treated from now on?

[***Fazz***]

Hey,

New here and joined because something has been bugging me now the last couple of days.

Had a huge argument over the phone with a friend, mainly him shouting at me about how angry he was with the crap advise I dished out regarding an issue of his 5 years ago. Clearly it touched a nerve and he has had a grudge since.

He is going through a bad time himself and I can tell that he was taking it all out on me because he was angry with his own life situations. However, whilst he was telling me how I should be a good friend (I have been, just shit at advise!), he said "You get all stubborn, moody and emotional because your diabetic".

I know it's a minor thing, but he's not the first to say that. When I have arguments with a family member, they also use Diabetes against me as though I have no right to feel angry, stubborn or moody. As though people without Diabetes don't have those negative moments now and then. I'm usually a happy-go-lucky person, but is this how I'm going to be labelled as now every time I get annoyed with someone??

It hurts. And yet people still continue...

 

[Radders]

How about this as a retort : Stubborn and moody might be fair criticism, but I am angry because of Your behaviour and that has nothing to do with my diabetes.

 

[Northerner]

I know it's a minor thing, but he's not the first to say that. When I have arguments with a family member, they also use Diabetes against me as though I have no right to feel angry, stubborn or moody. As though people without Diabetes don't have those negative moments now and then. I'm usually a happy-go-lucky person, but is this how I'm going to be labelled as now every time I get annoyed with someone??

You're a human being, and having diabetes is only one aspect of you. Perhaps you should say, 'yes, I have diabetes - what's your excuse for acting this way?' 😱 🙄 Whilst high or fluctuating levels can affect mood, all people are moody, angry, happy, depressed, stupid, sarcastic, clever, witty - whatever, so it's nonsensical to blame your diabetes. Don't stand for it! 😱

 

[grovesy]

Welcome!
It is not easy living with any long term conditions!

 

[***Fazz***]

Thank you all. I know I need to fight back, but it does hurt when you've been close to someone for many years and they come out with shit like that just to hurt you. I know I'm struggling with my Diabetes and I know there's a lot of crap to deal with. But I've learnt to accept it. It's beyond belief how people use it against you, making you wish you didn't have Diabetes all over again. I'm sure it would be unacceptable if I reacted the way they do to a person who say had Cancer or even a Disability. You just can't win.

 

[Ljc]

Hi Fazz, Welcome. I love Northeners suggestion. May I suggest that you completely distance yourself from this friend.

 

[AlisonM]

Some friend that is @***Fazz***, I'd do what Northerner suggests.

Indeed I have once when a similar argument erupted between me and a now ex-friend. I agreed I had diabetes and asked what his excuse was for yelling at me? I won't go into detail but it was just the last in a long line of unfair acts and accusations from someone who was determined to blame all his problems on anyone but himself and, frankly, life is too short.

 

[Rosiecarmel]

I'm normally a very upbeat, very easy going and happy person but obviously I'm human so I get mad, angry, short tempered etc and more recently when I've been short with someone the response I've got was "have you eaten?" "have you checked your blood sugars?" "is it your diabetes?" no!! it's just YOU p*****g me off!!

 

[***Fazz***]

I'm normally a very upbeat, very easy going and happy person but obviously I'm human so I get mad, angry, short tempered etc and more recently when I've been short with someone the response I've got was "have you eaten?" "have you checked your blood sugars?" "is it your diabetes?" no!! it's just YOU p*****g me off!!

Takes the piss doesn't it? I'm getting angry just thinking about such people. May be it's my Diabetes pfft! (Sarcastic tone)

 

[Martin Canty]

"You get all stubborn, moody and emotional because your diabetic".

To be honest, once I'd got my BG under control I became a lot more even tempered..... I don't think I was a nice person before DX