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I'm fed up

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This thread is now closed. Please contact Anna DUK, Ieva DUK or everydayupsanddowns if you would like it re-opened.
C

Caroline

Senior Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Type 2
Everyone just assumes that because I get on with things I don't want support (except here). If I go quiet they think I am concentrating on something, if I try to chat, they always have more important problems. They think I am strong because I don't have problems and then think I am being rude for walking away because it is all about them. I'd like to talk about me sometimes.

The doctor who is an idiot gives me a pack of pills or two weeks off if I burst into tears on him. What I want is a shoulder to cry on

Thanks for being here, and for listening and letting me have a moan.
 
Hi Caroline, sorry to hear it. I get that too (a lot). I even get it here from some individuals (very few and far between I must stress!). Support here is great, but sometimes you also want the people around you to show some interest and ask how you are feeling. I know that, sometimes, I look at people stressing about trivialities and think, 'think yourself lucky that you don't have what I have to deal with every day!' Yes, I know that there are many people with much bigger things to deal with.

I remember once having a discussion about how diabetes was affecting me and somehow the conversation got sidelined by an interruption and suddenly the topic had moved to which ?200 bottle of wine was better. I instantly felt that no-one was interested in what I had to say and that I'd just been boring everyone. The hostess later asked me why I'd been so quiet that evening...

I have maybe a couple of non-D friends who at least ask how I am occasionally, but most don't want to knpw, and casual aquaintances couldn't care less. It's the way of the world, I suspect, try not to let it get you down.
 
Big hugs Caroline....know how you feel hun....moan to me anytime...xxxxxxx
 
Thanks, it helped comming here to tell someone else about it!
 
There are 2 sorts of people in my view - 'givers' and 'takers' and if you have always been a 'giver' then people assume they can always 'take'. I suspect you are one of lifes 'givers' as you certainly are on this forum (as is Northerner and many others on here). I dont know how you can get it through to people that sometimes you would like some help and support - because I feel in the same boat most of the time. I absolutely love helping people, but I am my own worst enemy, as I very rarely let my true feelings out as I dont like to ask for help!
At least on here you can vent your feelings, and we are all here to help and support you and if you ever need a shoulder to cry on - I am here for you - just send me a pm.

I also dont think this problem is only related to living with diabetes. I often talk to people and realise that the whole of the conversation is centred around them and their lives etc and not once do they ask me how I am! But I do think that these sorts of people are extremely shallow and I probably wouldnt value their advice anyway!

The art of communication is the ability to listen. But those who are good at listening sometimes also need to be heard!😉🙂Bev
 
caroline well done for posting ...we love a good rant in here ....best place for a rant xxx i think your great and could not exist without your jokes and games on here and the thought of you in the BL with tummy problems just cracked me up xxx big hugs xxx
 
I feel exactly the same as you. People in our lives don't really understand unless they have it themselves, I think our partners and parents of the children that still live at home might do to some extent but only when we talk about it to them x
 
Me too Caroline, I sometimes think I'd explode if I couldn't come in here and vent sometimes. I've always been the strong one and folk around me don't know how to handle this new helpless me. Sometimes all I need is a hug, so in case it helps, here:
6a00d8341c574653ef0120a95419c0970b-500wi
 
Moan away Caroline, that is part of the benefit of the forum. I think it is v hard for non D's to understand that we have to live with this horrid condition all the time when there are no obvious outward signs. (excluding carers in that comment).

Remember you need some space and looking after too. Could you treat yourself to a day, or afternoon of doing just what you want?
 
Thanks everyone, it felt better being able to get things out and even better knowing I've been heard.🙂
 
I think the trouble is that people that don't have the dreaded 'D' don't understand what it's like to live with a medical condition 24/7 so when you happen to talk about it they just dismiss you as a boring whinger going on about a 'trivial thing' (In their opinion) and go on talking about 'more important things' like which ?200 bottle of wine was better as Northerner said.
 
And to think we were happy indoors with a bottle of wine for under a fiver! Whatever floats your boat. the moral and emotional support here is pricelss. For everything else there is master card!
 
Be self indulgent caroline - distance yourself from those self obsessed people - make some me time to do whatever you feel like doing and what will make you feel good. And if all else fails, come on here, have a glass of wine and let it all out!
 
Corrine said:
Be self indulgent caroline - distance yourself from those self obsessed people - make some me time to do whatever you feel like doing and what will make you feel good. And if all else fails, come on here, have a glass of wine and let it all out!
Click to expand...

See you in the virtual pub with a large one !
 
Hi Caroline you come across as such a warm and loving person and are certainly a great asset to this forum, you and me are usually the early birds on here and it is always nice to see you on, I always find having a rant helps me out so anytime you fancy one let it all out on here hun xxxxx
 
So sorry ur havin a tough time Caroline, there are some very insensitive people around arn't there? But please remember ur not on ur own, so if u want to rant and rave then Go for itgirl! It does no harm and in fact it does us good. Take care of yourself, big hugs, shirl x
 
Sorry to hear your having a hard time right now caroline, Big hugs!! Hope you feel better soon and feel free to rant anytme 🙂 x
 
I noticed that you give loooaaads of support here, so you are entitled to have a moan and be listened to too.

It's sad that people who are not Diabetic don't want to even know whether you're ok.

Hope you are feeling a bit better now after you have vented 🙂
 
I'm having 1 of those fed up, down in dumps moments now.

Only joined here about a month ago, and have found some things very useful but joining here has made me more paranoid about being diabetic.

I have known for a while now that i need to sort myself out n get my diabetes more under control but just can't seem to get motivated, no matter what i try. i know i really need to do it but it is easier said then done.

and reading stories on here about what could happen/complications etc should give me that motivation but its not 😡

but like now im panicing about what i could be doing to myself :(
 
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