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Feeling Guilty/Scared

Discussion in 'General Messageboard' started by Jenniw1990, Nov 7, 2019 at 10:25 PM.

  1. Jenniw1990

    Jenniw1990 New Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hi everyone
    I have recently been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes (2 weeks ago) after going to the Drs for over 15 months with various problems and not getting any answers. Obviously this has come as a shock to me and i am not going to lie i am frightened about it. Everything is new and i am slowly getting my head around certain things but my problem now is that i am scared of eating foods because i dont know which are going to affect my BG levels. i have changed my diet quite significantly, even though it wasnt unhealthy, i just didnt realise how much sugars were in the "healthy" foods i was eating. i am on tablets now and will be doing more exercise. i feel a sense of guilt when i eat now, thinking that everything i am eating is wrong and worrying about the impact on my BG.
    Thanks in advance :)
     
  2. everydayupsanddowns

    everydayupsanddowns Moderator

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 1
    Hello @Jenniw1990

    Welcome to the forum, though sorry to hear about your diagnosis.

    There certainly is a lot to get your head around at the start, so give yourself time to adjust. Diabetes is generally a fairly slow-moving foe, so you have some time to adapt to your new way of eating.

    If you’ve not found it already, many new members here find Maggie Davey’s letter a useful overview of T2 diabetes

    https://forum.diabetes.org.uk/boards/threads/maggie-daveys-letter-to-newly-diagnosed-type-2s.61307/


    And AlanS’s ‘test review adjust’ a simple, methodical way of improving blood glucose outcomes around food by getting an understanding how different carbohydrates affect you as an individual

    https://loraldiabetes.blogspot.com/2006/10/test-review-adjust.html
     
    ianf0ster likes this.
  3. Drummer

    Drummer Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    I'm araid that many people are misled by the concept of all those 'healthy' foods which are basically starch and sugar, and which are simply not right for Humans.
    It is not just the sugars which are bad for us.
    I recently experimented eating 30 gm of carbohydrate from a seeded bread roll along with the usual protein and fat for the day rather than carbs from veges and salad. My blood glucose went up to over 10mmol/l rather than the usual 7 and a bit. I react more strongly to carbs from grain , and from legumes too - so I stick to the foods I know I can cope with.
    I eat meat, fish, seafood, eggs and cheese, full fat yoghurt, I have frozen berries in the freezer along with mixed veges, and the fridges are full of salad and fresh veges, also sugar free jellies, and cream. I drink coffee with cream, but only eat twice a day.
    I am just coming up to three years from diagnosis, and have been avoiding grains and dense starches, sugars except for the berries,and checking that I was not spiking accidentally - I saw my blood glucose levels falling and my Hba1c fell to below diabetic levels to the top end of normal.
    I do only eat a maximum of 40 gm of carbs a day, but I prefer that to tablets, and I am officially in remission now.
     
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  4. everydayupsanddowns

    everydayupsanddowns Moderator

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 1
    I think it’s important to recognise that some individuals (and you are clearly one) have a much lower tolerance to carbohydrate than others - almost bordering on an allergy or intolerance - but that humans have had bread, grains and carbohydrate as a part of our diet for centuries.

    It appears to me to be more about the way our consumption of food, the way it is processed and changes in our lifestyles which has led to such a marked increase in problems with carbohydrates, rather than the carbohydrates themselves.
     
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  5. Docb

    Docb Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hi Jenniw1990. Confusing isn't it? Out of that confusion comes uncertainty, out of that comes worry and out of that can come guilt. Its pretty normal. My suggestion for getting your brain round things is to go back to the beginning and deal with the confusion. If you look at the main site you can get an overview of diabetes and work out where you fit into what is quite a big picture. I say use the main site because random googling will give you all sorts of information much of which very unreliable to say the least.

    Some things to work with.

    Do you have a HBA1c result? That alone will give you a good starting point for planning your way out. Check out what it means and the level of urgency you have with respect to making changes.

    What tablets have you been prescribed? Find out why they work and what they are intended to do. Look for the positives - you will find lots of negatives because the few that have had problems tend to make the most noise and the chances are that you will be amongst the vast majority that have benefited from them.

    Could you do with loosing a pound or two? The evidence that getting your weight right is a good thing for your blood glucose is very good. If your weight is OK, and you are one of us skinny diabetics, then that will influence your way forward.

    Diabetes is manageable and yes part of that management is thinking about what you eat. When you begin to understand why things happen then you can make your diet changes in a controlled fashion without worrying whether you are right or wrong. Rushing about in the dark only makes matters worse!

    Finally, ask questions on here. There are lots who have been where you are now and who can offer ideas about how to move on. It is a very supportive, and informative community.
     
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  6. Toucan

    Toucan Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hello Jenniw. So good that you have joined the forum, there is plenty of help and support here.
    I can still remember that big shock of first diagnosis although it was over 6 years ago, it really knocked me off my feet, and I felt very confused and apprehensive.
    Please try to stay positive as there are many good solutions, but there is no ‘one size fits all’ and you need to find what right for you.
    The links in everydayupsanddowns are very good places to start. The 3 main things to work on are diet, exercise and medication if your doctor has prescribed this.

    It took me a while to find what is best for me. it is healthier diet, and increased exercise, that has worked. As well as cutting out all the sugary things, I cut down on the carbs particularly the ‘white’ ones (white bread and flour,rice,pasta,etc ) and mainly eat fresh fish and poultry and occasionally red meat and have learned to love vegetables (although that took a while!). I also try to avoid to much processed food, and to include plenty of fibre some from the veg, plus seeds and pulses. There are many good recipes to make these things really tasty, and lots of ideas on this forum.
    It does all take time to adjust your lifestyle, but please be patient, it will be very worthwhile. I now feel much healthier, and have more energy and ‘zest’ for life.
    Best wishes in finding your solutions and please keep asking us any questions that you have, and we will try to help. It will also be good to hear how you get on.
     
    ianf0ster likes this.
  7. Felinia

    Felinia Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    I do understand your fear of whether you are eating the "right" foods or not, as I felt the same way at the beginning. A friend of mine was diagnosed a number of years ago and she too had the same reaction and at first was very strict with her food. She changed her diet and as her blood glucose came down, and she learned what she could eat without spiking her levels, she became more relaxed and it became a way of life for her. I am 3 months in since diagnosis and it has been a steep learning curve, but I too have found what suits me and I am more confident.
    One thing I found to be a great help was to get an app which shows the content (cals, carbs, sugars, fat, sat fat, protein, fibre, sodium) of literally thousands of foods, and keeps a running total by meal, by day, and by week. I plan in advance, enter into the app, know exactly what I am having, know it is low carb and so can enjoy my food. There are several different ones, some free. Mine is NutraCheck which was free for 6 months and now I pay £7.99 a month, as I also have web membership. It has a basic exercise recording facility but is not as comprehensive on exercise as MyFitbit.
    I don't know if you have been advised to get a blood glucose monitor which measures your BG before and 2 hours after eating. I was told by my diabetic nurse it was not necessary, but most members of this forum did recommend it. I got a SD Codefree with lancets and test strips from Amazon and used it to test the effects of specific foods on my BG. I soon learned that one small slice of wholemeal bread did not affect me, but potatoes and apples caused massive spikes. Other people are different, so we each have had to learn what is right for us.
    I was initially told to have less than 130gm carbs per day including sugars, which is the official NHS position. However I started myself with a limit of 90gm a day, then 75gm a day. At present I aim for between 50gm and 75gm per day and do not find it difficult. However this is me, and what suits me may not be right for anyone else. I eat mainly fresh and boiled vegetables, baked fish and poultry, eggs, one 80gm portion of fruit a day, and some dairy. I try to ensure I get enough of a mix to have all the essential minerals and vitamins, and I do weigh all my food by keeping a digital scale on my worktop. But there is an excellent book Cals and Carbs, which gives pictures of literally thousands of foods by portion size. If eating out, I research the menu online first so can make sensible choices. For example, last Sunday I had the spiced roasted cauliflower with a salad, and when I get a Chinese, I have stir fry vegetables with cashew nuts.
    Today is a fairly typical day for me. I will have a poached egg with grilled mushrooms and tomatoes, plus a couple of cups of tea with milk from my pre-weighed daily allowance. I then spend an hour in the swimming pool, doing Aquafit. Lunch will be a ham salad, or a bowl of homemade tomato and vegetable soup. Dinner I will have baked lemon sole (in tinfoil with a squirt of lemon juice and some herbs), with carrot/swede puree (instead of mash), cauliflower, broccoli, green beans. Then as a snack I will have 80 gm strawberries with a dessertspoon of natural Greek yogurt. So as you can see I don't go hungry. I have a mini exercise bike at home for the days I don't go to the pool. But I don't have cake, biscuits, sweets, pastries and look for substitutes for rice, pasta, potato. For example cauliflower "rice", courgetti, boodles, squash lasagne sheets, protein noodles. I also have the occasional strip of 85% dark cocoa Stevia sweetened chocolate (very rich and a nice treat with 9gm fibre per strip), or a small handful of chopped nuts (full of protein).
    This has just been my journey but I hope it gives you some ideas. Yours will differ I'm sure, but you will get loads of advice and help from members on this forum.
     
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  8. Jenniw1990

    Jenniw1990 New Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Thank you, i will certainly have a look at those :)
    I think as well the problem i am having is that nothing seems to be very quick. So for example ive seen my diabetic nurse (who is amazing) twice and am now waiting for appointments for a dietician, footcare and eyecare. The fact that i havent seen the dietician yet is probably why i am feeling like i am because i dont have the advice or guidence for it??

    Also my nurse said that i am okay to just take my BG first thing in a morning to see what my levels are, but surely wouldnt i be better doing it before and after the 3 meals a day.......perhaps that would help me get a better idea of what i am starting to look out for? honestly my brain is so full of this, that and the other its mind boggling !!
     
  9. ianf0ster

    ianf0ster Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hi Jenniw,
    It is understandable that you feel scared, I think we all feel that way at first.
    But it is so sad that you feel guilty. No newly diagnosed Type 2 diabetic should feel guilty! - Because it really isn't your fault that you got this way.

    How can I be so certain of that? - Because we have been brainwashed about food for over 50yrs.
    We were told that Saturated fats were bad, that Poly-unsaturated fats (causing trans-fats) were good and that sugars (in fruit), starchy veg (potato) and Grains ( bread, breakfast cereals) were all good. All of this was based upon some very dubious flaky work done by an American called Ansel Keys.
    He was not a medical doctor and he wasn't even a Nutritionist. He published a study which for 7 countries showed a supposed link between higher saturated fat consumption and higher death from Heart Attacks. What the people were not told was that he actually did the research on 22 countries - but cut out the data for 15 of them because they didn't fit his theory!

    I don't expect those who haven't tested or researched for themselves to believe this, but most of what we are told is healthy food is actually the worst food for a Type 2 diabetic - much more likely to cause Type 2 diabetes than to help manage it!

    Don't feel guilty. - Feel empowered by the new knowledge that will allow you to take control of your own body.
     
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  10. Felinia

    Felinia Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    I had to wait over a month to get my appointment with the dietician and almost 3 months to get a place on the training course (you should have been referred - if not ask your GP as it is only by referral). My nurse didn't want me monitoring at all - she said people become obsessed and I saw her point. However, I'm afraid I ignored that bit of advice and do monitor before and after. Not as much as at first, because now I have learned what I can and can't eat. As others have said, do work your way through the DUK online training videos - they are a great source of information and advice.
     
  11. Jenniw1990

    Jenniw1990 New Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    My HBA1c was 100, and the tablets they have prescribed me are Glimepiride. My diabetic nurse has only given me a very low dosage but siad she will look at adjusting it depending on my readings when i go to see her in January. This just seems like a long time to wait, i understand that it is for the 3 month timescale for the next blood test but again will i be doing what i should be?

    I am only slightly over weight (well i was before my diagnosis) but since finding out and changing parts my diet i seem to have lost some weight (dont know how much as i threw my scales out as i was becoming obsessive) but people have commented on how i look.
     
  12. ianf0ster

    ianf0ster Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Your instincts about testing before and after meals are right, but depending upon your medication you may also need to test at other times. The idea of initially testing just before and then 2hrs after each meal is that you will see exactly what that food did to your Blood Glucose (sugar). That way you can keep a food diary and learn which food, in which portion sizes are best for your body. We are all slightly different, so only you can find that out - you must do it for yourself.

    Don't worry about the delay in seeing a dietician, I'm sorry to say that most of them (still) tell you to eat the unhealthy stuff I mention in my post above. Indeed there is an NHS provided course called 'DESMOND' for Type 2 diabetics (given by independent trainers rather than BHS itself). Some people get a 'good one and say it is great, others (perhaps most) get a bad one - served biscuits and even cake at the tea-breaks and told to eat a lot of whole grains with every meal.
    So for many of us it may even better to avoid that course.
     
  13. ianf0ster

    ianf0ster Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    OK Jenni, Glimepiride is a drug in a class called 'Sulfonylureas' they work by helping/forcing your pancreas to produce more Insulin.
    Insulin is what the body produces to move energy around the body, to reduce Blood Glucose and to store excess Glucose into Fat Cells and when they are all full into the Liver, pancreas and other internal organs. This fat is how people get 'Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver' and other conditions. It is also thought to cause Type 2 Diabetes in the first place!
     
  14. Grannylorraine

    Grannylorraine Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Welcome to the forum, what you are feeling is perfectly normal, even though we all realise in time we are very rarely to blame. Just experiment with food until you find what works for you, I'll be honest it took me 2 years to really get my self in a good place, so don't beat yourself up if it takes you longer than it does others, I made some initial improvements and then stagnated for quite a while. I do watch my carbs, but do still eat them just in a portion controlled way, as in 30g porridge is fine, 40g sends my bg levels crazy, if I eat 2 spinach and ricotta filled cannelloni shells I only have a small bg rise, eat 3 and the rise is huge, you will find what works for you and remember we all have slips ups.
     
  15. ianf0ster

    ianf0ster Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    I too was only 2lbs into the overweight section of the BMI scale when diagnosed with Type 2 - this means that you are probably 'Thin Outside, Fat Inside' like me also called a TOFI.

    An HbA1C of 100 is high - but don't worry, some people have been able to reverse that back down to non-diabetic levels and come off all diabetic medicine in as little as 2yrs.
     
  16. ianf0ster

    ianf0ster Active Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    There are no drugs that really put Type " diabetes into remission, they just deal with the symptoms - and often make those symptoms worse so that the doses keep rising.
    But there 4 other ways of dealing with it and each person needs to find something that works well for them..

    When newly diagnosed T2's ask about what they should, I usually mention all 4 proven methods.
    1. Low Carb in all its varied forms is probably the easiest and most widely applicable Just that for Vegans and non-lacto Vegetarians it is much more difficult to do Low Carb.
    However for the rest of us, most people, it has some of the best proven results - 50% complete remission i.e. non-diabetic ( not pre-diabetic) HbA1C levels on absolutely no Diabetes medications at the 2yr stage for Dr David Unwin's patients prepared to try Low Carb at his Stockport GP practice. He is @lowcarbGP on Twitter.

    The other methods are:-
    2. Intermittent or longer fasting - but obviously a TOFI like me can't do a 3 week fast! Dr Jason Fung in Canada has huge success with very long fasts for his Morbidly Obese patients.

    3. Severely calorie restricted diets, such as the Newcastle Diet, the * week Blood Sugar Diet or even things like Slimmers World, WW etc. - you often stay very hungry for 8 weeks! And then can't maintain the weight loss (your metabolic rate has slowed down, so you have to eat even fewer calories or the weight starts going up even higher than at the start).

    4. Gastric Surgery - very good results in the short term, but not so good after 5yrs. The poor 5yr figures are thought to be because people never don't adjust there diet/cravings and so start to try and 'cheat' the procedure by eating too many Calories again.
     
  17. Docb

    Docb Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hi Jenny. Looks like your experience is bit like mine, high HBA1c but not excessively overweight and put on a sulphonurea. I have embraced the "lower" carb approach, cutting back on carbs, and this has been effective for me. Takes a while, but I went from max to min doses of the pills in a few months.

    If you are taking an insulin producing med then you should have been offered a blood glucose testing kit, it is what the NICE guidelines recommend. Use of it sensibly will tell you quite quickly if you are heading in the right direction.
     
  18. Felinia

    Felinia Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    The 3 month wait is standard, as the HbA1c test measures your average blood sugar levels over the last 2 to 3 months. Doctors use this test to find out how someone is managing their diabetes. I see you have a monitoring kit, as it is a requirement for the type of medication you have been given. This should educate you on what causes spikes in your BG, and I suggest you keep a food diary, if you are not using an app as I mentioned before. When you next see your nurse, she should weigh you, if you don't want to get any scales. My diabetic nurse also told me to make sure I ate enough, of suitable foods.
    I too have the same fear about whether or not I am doing what I should. But my cousin, who was a diabetic nurse before she retired, put it in perspective. She told me that if I: a) reduced my carbs - both starches and sugars, b) increased my exercise, c) kept records and acted on them, I was doing the best I could to help myself. She also told me to d) reduce portion sizes and e) lose weight which I don't think applies to you!! (I have over 6 stone to lose and ate myself into diabetes).
    Please don't feel guilty - it would seem you may be one of the unlucky people, with a pre-disposition, maybe genetic, to develop diabetes, as you are very young, and not overweight. If you have any concerns at all please don't hesitate to go back to your doctor, and bounce your concerns off the Forum members
     
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  19. Drummer

    Drummer Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    If you go low carb, you might need to stop taking the tablets, as low carb acts to reduce the need for insulin, whilst the tablets hammer insulin out of the pancreas - the background idea of them is that people will not try to reverse their condition and go on eating the carbs. It is very common amongst drs and nurses, and it might lead to hypos - watch it if you drive, as you must test to make sure you are safe and legal - the nurse should have given you a meter and prescription for strips.
    Your Hba1c is high, but mine was 91 and I was no longer in the diabetic range after 80 days of low carb.
     
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  20. SueEK

    SueEK Well-Known Member

    Relationship to Diabetes:
    Type 2
    Hello and welcome. I am like you, high HbA1c reading and slim when diagnosed in January. Take good note of what everyone says here, I have found the information so much better than the course and certainly from my DN (diabetic nurse). Definitely do the testing as this will highlight what your body does and does not like and then you can adapt your diet accordingly. Obviously this will take a time to find out but as this is a permanent change you have the time to do it. Lastly and very importantly do not beat yourself up about it being your fault or what you are eating. It’s most definitely NOT your fault and learning what to eat takes time especially when you can’t afford to lose too much weight.
    Look over the site and ask as many questions as you want, have a moan or let us congratulate you when something good has happened. We all need each other here so join in
     
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