Enjoying the peace and freedom.....

rebrascora

rebrascora

Well-Known Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Type 1
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She/Her
Just a few thoughts about suddenly being without Libre.....

My Libre sensor died during the night last night, 2 days early. I awoke just after 4am slightly hypo I think, reached under my pillow for my reader and scanned to be told the sensor had failed and to start a new one. Thought it might be a reader fault so rummaged around in my bag next to the bed for my phone but it also said my sensor had ended. I didn't have my test kit to hand as I always do at home (I was at Ian's), so lay there panicking that I had no means of testing and wondering if I should get up and head home on foot at 4am so that I could test. I should say that if I had been further afield I would have had a test kit in the car. Anyway, I lay there and dealt with the mild panic of being unable to check my levels and then listened to my body and decided that I was probably mildly hypo, ate one JB and went back to sleep and all was well.... at least as far as I know.

Woke up this morning and needed to inject insulin before I got out of bed, but obviously doing it blind with no means of testing and with my recent tooth abscess my doses have increased and needed nearly daily adjustment, so again a bit of panic as had no real idea where my levels might be. Anyway, I jabbed 24u Levemir and 2u of Fiasp that I normally need for FOTF and got up and had a coffee and half an hour later I felt a hypo coming on. Oddly that hypo was very comforting because it meant that I now had a point of reference for where my BG levels actually were and I no longer felt nearly so vulnerable. I am a big advocate of knowledge is power and that hypo gave me knowledge. I ate a couple of JBs and left the house and stopped at my yard and fed my GGs and walked home afterwards and tested when I got in to get a lovely 6.5.
The rest of the day so far has been surprisingly peaceful with no Libre to scan or alarms going off and at times I have almost forgotten I am diabetic. Yes I have had to finger prick a few times, particularly to drive to the dentist's and back but once I had overcome the feeling of being vulnerable without that technology, I have actually really enjoyed the sense of freedom from it.

Don't get me wrong, I really, really love Libre and the data and reassurance it gives me, but I dislike how vulnerable it initially makes me feel when I am without it. Learning to listen to and trust your body is an important part of managing diabetes in my opinion and I do think that Libre/CGM is partially taking that away from us and making us feel more vulnerable than we are and particularly newly diagnosed insulin dependents who have not lived without CGM.

I may start to take a voluntary Libre break more often, just for a day or two maybe once a month. Just to keep my self awareness and mental balance...... more balanced! I used to take a break from it because I found Libre overwhelming at times, particularly if my diabetes management wasn't as good as I would like, but I haven't taken a deliberate break for a long time and things have mostly been going really well. I think I need to factor in a regular short break though, regardless, just to reset my own self awareness and reassert my independence and hopefully enjoy this peacefulness and freedom that I have felt today.
 
When I was first diagnosed, we only tested four times a day @rebrascora : before meals and before bed. I remind myself of that when I have a CGM issue. As you say, it’s a mix of nerve-wracking initially but then surprisingly freeing later. I still wouldn’t give up my Dexcom though.
 
Pleased I am not the only one to experience that mixture of emotions. The panic is horrible and understandable of course, but the feeling of liberation and peacefulness once I got over the panic and got on with my day has been a pleasant surprise and I just wanted to reflect on it a bit and acknowledge it.
 
I left my phone at home when I went to work last week, had an initial panic , then remembered life before the libre and went back to listening to my body and finger pricking.
 
For a long time when I was initially self funding I used to use Libre1 on a sort of once every month or two basis as I couldn’t afford them full time.

There are definite headspace benefits and challenges to both situations I found. I was a lot of years guessing between the dots.
 
I too understand what you feel about the "freedom". Like Mike, when I was first self funding Libre, I would only have one for about a third of the time.
But, even now, I could not go to bed without my finger prick kit close to hand. Maybe it has been too many compression lows in the past or just force of habit (my pre-bed prick is my daily calibration) but whether to take a finger prick meter with me is definitely a case of "how long?" I will be away from home rather than "how far?".
I don't take the car for "quick trips" so if I am going to drive I will be away for long enough to take the meter.
 
rebrascora said:
Just a few thoughts about suddenly being without Libre.....

My Libre sensor died during the night last night, 2 days early. I awoke just after 4am slightly hypo I think, reached under my pillow for my reader and scanned to be told the sensor had failed and to start a new one. Thought it might be a reader fault so rummaged around in my bag next to the bed for my phone but it also said my sensor had ended. I didn't have my test kit to hand as I always do at home (I was at Ian's), so lay there panicking that I had no means of testing and wondering if I should get up and head home on foot at 4am so that I could test. I should say that if I had been further afield I would have had a test kit in the car. Anyway, I lay there and dealt with the mild panic of being unable to check my levels and then listened to my body and decided that I was probably mildly hypo, ate one JB and went back to sleep and all was well.... at least as far as I know.

Woke up this morning and needed to inject insulin before I got out of bed, but obviously doing it blind with no means of testing and with my recent tooth abscess my doses have increased and needed nearly daily adjustment, so again a bit of panic as had no real idea where my levels might be. Anyway, I jabbed 24u Levemir and 2u of Fiasp that I normally need for FOTF and got up and had a coffee and half an hour later I felt a hypo coming on. Oddly that hypo was very comforting because it meant that I now had a point of reference for where my BG levels actually were and I no longer felt nearly so vulnerable. I am a big advocate of knowledge is power and that hypo gave me knowledge. I ate a couple of JBs and left the house and stopped at my yard and fed my GGs and walked home afterwards and tested when I got in to get a lovely 6.5.
The rest of the day so far has been surprisingly peaceful with no Libre to scan or alarms going off and at times I have almost forgotten I am diabetic. Yes I have had to finger prick a few times, particularly to drive to the dentist's and back but once I had overcome the feeling of being vulnerable without that technology, I have actually really enjoyed the sense of freedom from it.

Don't get me wrong, I really, really love Libre and the data and reassurance it gives me, but I dislike how vulnerable it initially makes me feel when I am without it. Learning to listen to and trust your body is an important part of managing diabetes in my opinion and I do think that Libre/CGM is partially taking that away from us and making us feel more vulnerable than we are and particularly newly diagnosed insulin dependents who have not lived without CGM.

I may start to take a voluntary Libre break more often, just for a day or two maybe once a month. Just to keep my self awareness and mental balance...... more balanced! I used to take a break from it because I found Libre overwhelming at times, particularly if my diabetes management wasn't as good as I would like, but I haven't taken a deliberate break for a long time and things have mostly been going really well. I think I need to factor in a regular short break though, regardless, just to reset my own self awareness and reassert my independence and hopefully enjoy this peacefulness and freedom that I have felt today.
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Interesting experience @rebrascora & pleased you've had a positive experience of being cgm free.

Going to be honest here but I don't think I'd feel same, got so use to cgm now that being without it & going back to bg testing doesn't bear thinking about, the info that it provides night & day is invaluable even before starting on hcl.

Looking back can't believe that some days would do up to 10 bg tests, modern tech is a wonderful thing.
 
I just knew from the title of the thread that this was about time away from Libre! 😎
Fully agree with the pros and cons you described. There can be no doubt that Libre and other CGMs have helped us maintain better control of our BGs in exchange for draining our mental health. NHS has invested big time in the former and has no idea about the latter yet.
 
I have to admit I felt the same feeling when a recent CGM dropped off, I decided to have a break and only checked my BS morning and evening, for a few days, unless I felt hypo, I wouldn't be without my Libre its helped me so much but its nice to have a break.
 
I’ve had a few days break since having it in March 2020 the alarms I don’t miss but I know my control is better with it. I wouldn’t notice highs until I was at 14 so I would feel rubbish then, it’s not worth it for me for that.

And being able to set the low alarm pre hypo levels and symptoms mean I have a lot less hypos than before. Hardly any.

Every now and then I do turn off the alarms and that does help with mental overload. I think this is great feature.

My daughter has done one of the screening tests for T1 recently. That was 3 finger blood samples about 5p size, the moaning and drama she made about it I couldn’t get over. She knows I had to do similar did years multiple times a day, and how sore my fingertips always were. I couldn’t go back to that over the libre. She even had a plaster on for days. Imagine if we’d have done that. Would have no bare skin on our fingers left.
 
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