Doctors / Hospital

[2023Bride_]

Hi Everyone

My boyfriend is 30 and got Diagnosed with diabetes Type 1 at the age of 6.

My boyfriend is terrified of blood test and doctors. He hasn’t been to any of his doctors appointments/Hospital or eye appointments.
We have tried so many way to get him to go to the appointments. They have even called him but nothing works. This has been going on for 4 years now. Can anyone help with advice or if there partners have been going through the same? We’re getting married next year and I want to spend the rest of my life with him❤️

His Diabetes Is well controlled apart from a a few lows a month and a odd high. He does take his blood 4 times a day. If I get involved or his family he just says “it’s my condition not yours”

Any help would be amazing

Thank you x

 

[Pumper_Sue]

Problem with not going is if he has problems with DVLA for any reason and no medical checks made etc he wont be able to retain a driving licence if he has one.

Bottom line is though you can lead a horse to water but can not make it drink.

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

I wonder if your boyfriend had a difficult time with healthcare professionals in the past (maybe during teenage years). And felt judged or ‘told off’ by someone?

It’s an easy trap to fall into - but really the Drs and nurses should be seen more like the support team for elite athletes - a group of people whose job it is to help him perform at his very best and win at diabetes (haha!). At the very least it should be a collaborative effort, where he brings his lived experience, needs, wants, desires and frustrations, and they bring their research-knowledge, experience of a wide variety of other cases, and ability to prescribe and provide the latest tech and support to help him.

If he doesn’t have a functioning (and beneficial) relationship with his current clinic, he probably should try going somewhere else.

 

[Leadinglights]

If you could just get him to go to one of the outstanding appointments and he had a positive experience then he may not be quite so reluctant to go to others.
If he is not going then he may not be benefiting from the technology now available which would make his life (and yours) easier.

 

[trophywench]

If you could just get him to go to one of the outstanding appointments and he had a positive experience then he may not be quite so reluctant to go to others.
If he is not going then he may not be benefiting from the technology now available which would make his life (and yours) easier.

Tell him he can test his blood glucose without pricking his fingers, but sadly, he will need to engage with his diabetes clinic in order to get one ...... so it's true he's missing out on newer technology!

I'm talking about an Abbott Healthcare Libre 2 - but there are other things too..

 

[Saoirse]

Hi Everyone

My boyfriend is 30 and got Diagnosed with diabetes Type 1 at the age of 6.

My boyfriend is terrified of blood test and doctors. He hasn’t been to any of his doctors appointments/Hospital or eye appointments.
We have tried so many way to get him to go to the appointments. They have even called him but nothing works. This has been going on for 4 years now. Can anyone help with advice or if there partners have been going through the same? We’re getting married next year and I want to spend the rest of my life with him❤️

His Diabetes Is well controlled apart from a a few lows a month and a odd high. He does take his blood 4 times a day. If I get involved or his family he just says “it’s my condition not yours”

Any help would be amazing

Thank you x

Hi, I was diagnosed t1D as an adult but was chronically ill as a child, with many appointments, hospital stays, medication etc. I grew up being the 'sick child' and the one everyone was worried about and having adults talking over my head to doctors about me. No idea what your partner's experience of childhood T1D was, but my own previous illness has made me fiercely private and needing to be firmly in charge of my own health. I can emphathise with where your partner is coming from. It sounds like his t1 is currently well-managed which is great, except the day in day out of it can be exhausting and lead to burnout. T1 is never-ending and at some point he is going to need to engage whether to change a prescription etc. He is also missing out on the new tech which takes some of the burden away. This may be a 'carrot' to encourage him to try a clinic appointment, but it does have to be his choice in the end, as difficult as that may be. An appointment might feel like too big a first step though, maybe he might be willing to join us on here, we are a friendly bunch, just for a chat?

 

[DaveB]

Hi. How is he able to get his insulin prescriptions renewed etc if he doesn't have any contact with the NHS?

 

[Bruce Stephens]

Hi. How is he able to get his insulin prescriptions renewed etc if he doesn't have any contact with the NHS?

Well, he must have contact with the NHS. But he may be declining all offers of other appointments (as is his right).

 

[rebrascora]

Hi and welcome.

I see my hospital appointments as an opportunity to get an overview of my diabetes management and ask for things that I believe may help me.... maybe a change of insulin or some new tech, particularly if I have read about something here on the forum which I feel may be helpful to me. The way I view my diabetes is that I am the expert in it because I live with it every day and every meal and every night and every time I go out for exercise or drive the car. The nurses and consultant are there to support me with that, so if I feel something will help, I make a case for why they should let me try it. Some of these things, like the Freestyle Libre system can be an absolute game changer. Getting your eyes screened regularly is also hugely important as it can spot problems before any real damage occurs and help preserve your sight.

I wonder if he could be persuaded to join this forum if it is just blood tests and doctors which terrify him. He could learn so much from just comparing notes here with the rest of us as I know I have over the past 3.5 years. I have learned more from this forum than all the medical experts I have seen so far and it is good, life experience, practical knowledge, rather than the text book stuff the doctors tell us. He would certainly get an insight into some of the tech developments which can make our diabetes management easier and perhaps realize that he is missing out on this.