Can anyone be my mentor on the net?

[queenbee01]

Hi! Chaps, Been a type 2 diabetic for coming up to 3 years now and I am having a real tough time trying to kill the devil who sits on my shoulder and tells me Its ok to eat naughty things and having the will power of a whelk which stops me behaving sensibly. I have been watching a horror story unfold in front of me every day for the last year. My mum is a type 1 diabetic and has been for 40 years, She has never tried to control her diabetes and has completely neglected her diabetes and health. Now at the age of 74 I am mum's carer with my eldest sister. A carer of a weird old lady who is no longer our mum but a willful, selfish, stubborn, scheming lady who can not be bothered any more and seems determined to kill her self.

The horror story part of it is that I can see myself ending up like mum if I do not get a hold of the devil who sits on my shoulder and kick this Whelk of mine up the perverbial. Every day, I eat things that I know are not good for me, and it's a constant battle with my two chums, the devil and the whelk.
Food has become a contiguous issue with me and every day I try to stop myself from eating what I should not and every day I fail.
I run a guest house with my partner and every other day, I bake, cookies, cakes and bread. Every day I eat at least two or three cookies and or Three slices of bread with lashings of butter, and I am disgusted with myself. Help I am turning into my mother!
Yesterday I thought right, today I am not going to eat anything naughty. I had vegetable crudities and humous for breakfast. 4 ryvita with smoked mackerel for lunch, and a pear and apple for snacks. my evening meal was bbq chicken tika (home made with spices and yoghurt) with salad.
at 9.30pm I had 2 slices of toast with butter and before I went to bed a marathon bar! Why I do not know, I was'nt hungry, but as usual the devil and the whelk let me do it. Why do I keep behaving like my mum! It scares the holly c--- out of me because I really do not want to end up like mum or worse.
Guys. Im going to blog on this forum site every day, to record what I have eaten and how I feel. When I have done good, please can someone out there give me a pat on the back and encourage me. and the days when I have not, kick me up the perverbial.
Thanks in anticipation. x

 

[Klocky]

Hi Bee, I'm sure you'll get lots of takers - it also sounds like you know where you're going wrong so good on you - keep up the good work 🙂

 

[Caroline]

Hi and welcome to the forum. I'll give you your first pat on the back for comming and sharing how you feel with us. You have taken the very important first step, so well done for that.

Have a read through the forum, there are lots of tips and ideas that may help you. You mentioned bread. Have you tried wholemeal or wholegrain bread? If you like it is better than white bread.

Don't be too hard on yourself for eating cakes and biscuits, I always find it very hard to bake things and not sample them myself, so you're not alone. And we need treats sometimes. I think I'd go crazy if I wasn't allowed chcolate at all.

Do you have help in the kitchen? Perhaps you can delegate some of the baking to others while you arrange flowers or something?

Keep reading the forum, come back and ask as many questions as you like, all questions are important and some one is sure to turn up soon with an answwer.

 

[Mark T]

Welcome to the forums queenbee01 🙂

 

[Robster65]

Hi queenbee. Welcome 🙂

It's no wonder that you're struggling with willpower when your only real example is your mum, who obviously has had a lifetime of not being able to control her indulgences. I would imagine she learnt this behaviour from her parents too !

As said, you've taken the first step. If it were me, I'd be trying to break the cycle by deciding I'm not going to end up like my mother and seek medical help from my GP, who would hopefully offer counselling and possibly psychiatric help. After so many years, it needs a professional to break those habits IMHO.

You are on the right road. I hope you can keep taking steps forward. 🙂

Rob

 

[everydayupsanddowns]

Hi Queenbee

Welcome to the forum. The great thing about this place is that you don;t need to ask for just one 'mentor' to help you when you are feeling low, or build you up when you've controlled your inner carb-demons. Posting here means you have hundreds of mentors seemingly available round the clock 365 days a year. 🙂

Jump in!
M

 

[Vicsetter]

Hi Queenbee and fellow Guest House Owner, I know how hard it is - all those left over sausages, home made marmalade etc,etc. I had a similar struggle stopping smoking and stopping eating things I shouldn't is real hard. I love cooking and try and make my own bread. although I try not to eat it (the wife does). and I foolishly bought a Magimix to replace a clapped out Kenwood chef, so I've been on a spate of making sponge cakes of various flavours.

It's helpful for others to put your main diabetic meds in your signature, along with anything else you think we should know.

Maybe we could get Channel 5 to do a 5 in a diabetic come dine with me programme.

Feel free to message me if you want a chat, Vic.
P.S. whats can we call you, Queenbee is a too much typing!

 

[Steff]

Hi Queenbee and a warm welcome to the forum

 

[Blythespirit]

Hi Queenbee and welcome to the forums,

What is it they say? Be careful what you wish for? Lol You asked for a mentor and got us lot! The devil and welk better just pack up and leave now.

Well done for taking things in hand and coming on here. Don't be too hard on yourself though, we are all human and slip up many times. Doing your best most of the time and muddling through is about as good as it gets.

I look forward to reading your posts and I'm ready for all the back patting and butt kicking. Take care. XXXXX

 

[RachelT]

Hello QueenBee, pleased to meet you.
I'm sympathetic, i've got something of a problem elderly relative and i'm a major toast-a-holic myself (with occasional scone binges) . I think it's mean that some people breeze through life being able to eat what they like and some of us have to feel bad about eating something as normal and seemingly harmless as toast! As vices go it doesn't seem that bad does it?
You see when i was first diagnosed, (three years ago this september) i made myself give up chocolate bars. Before that i'd eat two or three of them a day without thinking about it, because it's easy and everybody else does it. I sort of decided that anything that wasn't from the sweet counter was the lesser of the two evils and that was ok, but i've replaced my chocolate binges with toast and scones. I'm not an enthusiastic cook, coz there's just me and i can't be bothered and i have to do my own clearing up afterwards, so i eat rubbish most of the time. I'm not a good girl by any means, and i'm a weird sort of perfectionist who beats herself up when she fails to meet her own, ridiculously high standards, so it gets me down sometimes. Plus if i think about it too much i also beat myself up for having diabetes. The dumb thing is that i'm not actually doing that badly, my doctor doesn't want to see much and although my Hba1c is a bit on the high side, it's not horrible.
I'm sure that you're also doing alright, what do your test results say? Do you have a finger prick tester? If so you can keep and eye on your blood glucose and see how well or badly you are doing, and remember, it's your blood glucose levels over time that matter in the long run, not how high your glucose is at that particular instant. As my mum says, as long as it doesn't stay up, you're ok. And your mum's diabetes is very different to yours, i don't think that any two of us have the exact same condition, even amongst just type 1s or just type 2s.
My problem elder is my granddad, he's been diabetic (type 2) for as long as any of us can remember. And his condition seems to pretty much manage it'self, as long as he takes his meds. He's not really my problem, he's mostly been dumped on my Dad, who is doing a wonderful job. I feel bad because i live far away from them and i don't have good transport. When i do go home i get scared of visiting him (Granddad, not Dad ) because all i seem to get is so called advice on what i'm not doing right, like speaking slowly and clearly enough, or dressing properly, and he really objects to my glasses...I hate that he's in a nursing home, even though i know it's the best place for him, and for the rest of my family. And i feel bad that my Dad has to deal with this (plus i'm scared by what may or may not happen when my parents get to 80 and i have to do the same. I've told Dad that he'd better not go the same way, coz i can almost take it from Granddad but i sure as heck couldn't take it from him.)
Ok, that all got a lot more personal than i intended, but i hope that it maybe illustrated that you're not alone. I wish i could offer some super brilliant advice but alas, i haven't got any as yet. If i ever find some i'll let you know, OK?

Good luck

Rachel

 

[rossi_mac]

Well done for getting on here and having an aim to improve your world.

I'm sure you will get on with everyone here as we all have weak moments! And i'm sure you will be able to help some of us out too with your knowledge and experiences.

Take care, and stick around,

Rossi 🙂

 

[Klocky]

P.S. whats can we call you, Queenbee is a too much typing!

How about HRH?

 

[AlisonM]

No, no, she's not a mere Highness, she's Her Maj. Welcome in HM.

Under the circumstances, I wonder if your doctor would be willing to help you test your Blood Glucose, at least before and maybe two hours after meals - at least for a few months. This would give you a clearer idea of what foods your system can tolerate. You're obviously doing your best but maybe regular testing would give you the nudge you need to stay on the straight and narrow. It certainly does me when I slip off the path the results can be quite startling.

You're in the right place anyway to get all the moral support you could want.

 

[Vicsetter]

No, no, she's not a mere Highness, she's Her Maj. Welcome in HM.

Under the circumstances, I wonder if your doctor would be willing to help you test your Blood Glucose, at least before and maybe two hours after meals - at least for a few months. This would give you a clearer idea of what foods your system can tolerate. You're obviously doing your best but maybe regular testing would give you the nudge you need to stay on the straight and narrow. It certainly does me when I slip off the path the results can be quite startling.

You're in the right place anyway to get all the moral support you could want.

I presume you are suggesting that her GP should prescribe test strips and not that her GP actually helps with the testing!

 

[Lizzie53]

Hi QB. I can totally sympathise with you as I am just the same. I really need to see what the foods do to me and so I must test my blood every day 2 or 3 times. It really does keep me off the foods that send me high. You haven't said what meds (if any) you take or what your Hba1c is. Have you been given a monitor and strips?

 

[donnarob]

Hi and welcome to the forum. No one here judges but gives good, practical advice. You have done a really good thing coming on here, we are all around to support each other.

Donna 🙂

 

[Klocky]

Hi QB, you haven't been back to update us, come on fess up 🙂