Boating on the Norfolk Broads.

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Chris Hobson

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The adventure begins.
A genuinely new experience for me, five days on a boat on the Norfolk Broads. My sister in law Jill has an autistic son Micheal. Mike lives in sheltered accommodation and Jill takes him, along with various members of the extended family on various adventures from time to time. Jill and Mike have done the Norfolk Broads in the past and he has enjoyed it, this time around myself and wife Liz get to be the crew. We start with the long drive from Hull to the Herbert Woods boat yard at Potter Higham where we pick up our vessel.

The Briefing.
After being sorted out with life-jackets we get taken out of the docking area by a jovial HW employee for the nautical equivalent of the motorbike CBT. Jill is appointed Captain being the only one in our group with previous experience, I take the wheel wanting to have my first attempt done under expert supervision. I get shown how to drive the boat along, how to turn it around, speed up, slow down and stop. He gently takes the piss when I occasionally get things wrong but seems satisfied with my performance as he instructs me to maneuver close to some moored boats where he jumps off. Now we're on our own. The boat's manual states that HW reserve the right to refuse to let you go out if the captain proves to be unable to navigate the boat or unable to control their crew, so I think we must have done alright.

The Boat.
Our boat is called The Countess Of Light and is a biggish river cruiser. There are only four of us but the boat is, in theory, big enough for twelve, I think they would need to be very close friends. There are three bedrooms, two with double beds, one with bunks. One odd little hole for someone who doesn't have a problem with claustrophobia and then a living area which can be rearranged for sleeping in if needed. The duvets all have a nautical themed design on them. Liz and I bagged the room in the bow with the en-suite toilet, useful for old gits who can't make it through the night without getting up for a widdle. There is a kitchen, sorry galley at the rear, I mean stern. The galley is well equipped with a fridge, gas cooker and plenty of cupboards. There is a microwave but you can only use it when you are hooked up to a mains power supply. There are some patio doors that open onto a small outside area behind. The general home from home comforts are very similar to those found in a caravan or camper van but less limited. We had a telly though we had to deploy the ariel on the roof and sometimes the reception was a bit iffy. There is a car type FM radio which was a little dated so it didn't have a Bluetooth connection. The water tanks, batteries and toilet tanks are much more generously proportioned than those in Jill's camper van so you don't have to worry as much about them getting too full or too empty. Apart from refilling the water tank we didn't have to worry about everything being tanked up as it had all been done for us. The boat is powered by an old school Perkins marine diesel engine via a hydrostatic drive. This means that forward and backward progress is controlled by a single lever. The helm is in the corner of the living area which has a roof that slides backwards like a convertible car, this involves a lot of winding of a winding handle. We did get a bit of rain so we couldn't have the roof open much and the windscreen wiper was a bit rubbish.

Cruising along.
The helm looks very much like a steering wheel but this is not quite like driving a car. Firstly we pass on the right if we meet someone coming the other way. Those of us with an engine must always give priority to sail boats. The boat steers from the rear like a combine or a fork lift truck. When going in reverse you can't steer it at all but it doesn't always go back in a straight line. When going forward you need a certain amount of speed before you can steer it which can be a problem if you are maneuvering in a confined space. When just going along you learn to make small corrections and get used to the fact that there is a delay between turning the wheel and the boat reacting. There are additional inputs from currents, the wind and the wake from other boats that you also need to compensate for. The upside is that everything happens very slowly. There are speed limits of four, five and six mph so there is always plenty of time to react.

Mooring.
Whenever we needed to tie up Jill took the helm and Liz and Myself did jumping ashore and pulling the boat in and tying it up. Mostly this worked well except when we tied up at a wharf that was very badly maintained. Here we had to crack out the ground anchors and figure out how to use them. Mooring made me realise how hopeless I am at tying knots so my next challenge is to educate myself before we do it all again next year.

Autism.
I've known my nephew Micheal all his life but this is the first time that I have spent an extended period of time with him. He has an amazing talent for creating sculptures from plasticine, I knew that. His mind seems to need constant stimulation, the lack of Internet access was often a problem. We had to cover up the little plaque that had the boat's registration numbers and specifications on it because the numbers on it were bothering him. He tends to talk to himself a lot, often repeating the same phrases over and over. He insists on a rather limited diet and fun was had when his chicken nuggets, chips and beans came with a garnish of watercress. Ugh weeds, don't like weeds. Garnishes always give him a problem whether it is a slice of lemon with his fish and chips or a side salad. He can't just leave the unwanted items on his plate, they have to be disposed of, which usually involved me eating it. An English fried breakfast with side salad was a new experience for me at least. He would sort his beans into two piles, perfect beans and broken or damaged beans. Only the perfect beans got eaten. He loved looking at the wildlife and was brilliant at identifying Herons, different kinds of raptors, ducks, geese, swans, moorhens, grebes, etc.

Home again.
All in all everyone had a great time, I'm feeling pretty knackered but tonight I get to sleep in my own bed.
 
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You lucky blighters. That's my idea of a blissful holiday. 🙂
 
Glad you enjoyed it, I have never actually stayed on a boat on the broads, but as I visit Norfolk we often go for a day out on the broads.
 
Really enjoyed reading your light hearted description of your trip Chris. I was thinking that you hadn't mentioned navigating locks but then perhaps there aren't any on the Norfolk broads!

We did a couple of trips on canal boats when we were younger and always really enjoyed them..... particularly the locks!
 
No locks, Norfolk is famous for being flat. Jill has already booked next year's trip but in a slightly smaller boat, one of those that looks a bit like a floating bus. It has bow thrusters which should make it easier to steer and has a built in Internet connection.
 
Can Michael eat OK when his food is touching another food on the plate? Neither our severely autistic great grandson aged about 3 and built like a brick outhouse, weighs approx half a ton and solid, nor an adult friend aged about 33 who is a highly adapted actuary for an insurance company and plays in a silver band, can cope well with food touching on the plate.

Little one so far can recite the alphabet and count up to 20 - though whether either make sense to him or ever will - nobody knows! But he does know when he does either, adults seem very pleased .......
 
The food touching doesn't seem to be a problem, it's unexpected additions that he doesn't like. He also has a quite limited range of things that he will eat. Pepperoni pizza, ham sandwich on white bread, chicken nuggets with beans and chips, fish and chips and apples. He tends to only drink fruit juice.
 
Sounds like a lovely holiday @Chris Hobson

I remember reading ‘Coot Club’ as a kid (well, it being read to us as a family book) one of Arthur Ransome’s boat-based tales. Have fancied a boating holiday on the Broads ever since!
 
Well you need to go for it then. Don't go collecting life's tee shirt and medal regretting all the things that you didn't do. It isn't horrendously expensive if you go with a gang and share the cost. It was handy to have someone with us who had done it before so we were not starting out completely clueless, though I suspect that the Briefing might have been longer had we all been complete newbies. I do wonder if younger folk might find it a bit boring as the pace is so slow and nothing much happens between the places that you visit.
 
I used to sail and motor boat on the Broads during the summer holidays with my parents and sister.

I fondly remember it, though not so much the toilets, nor a bowsprit that came through the hull just above the bunk I was lying on reading a comic as someone had lost control coming the other way and crashed into us in one of the connecting channels!

I learned to row and dinghy sail singlehanded when I was little (primary school age) and it was a good lesson in responsibility/self-reliance as well as being really exciting to be allowed to head off and sail and/or row around and explore whichever broad we were overnighting in (doubtless with my parents keeping an eye on me! 🙂)
 
@Chris Hobson thanks for your boating holiday postcard, this has really encouraged me to book narrow boat holiday I can organise with friends and family this year, having been inspired by the popular TV series "Narrow Escapes" on Channel 4 as the boating community are the polar opposite of my local community - friendly, polite, helpful, good humoured, neighbourly, supportive and willing to uplift newbies and beginners showing them the ropes! Really glad your autistic nephew is fully included as sometimes families just exclude family member with learning difficulties or mental health issues labelling them as "problems" or "risk"... 😉
 
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