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Bad behaviour and type 1

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A

Alannahxh

New Member
Relationship to Diabetes
Parent of person with diabetes
Hi,
I wanted to ask if anyone has had a problem with extreme bad behaviour with their child. My daughter is nearly 13 diagnosed 4 years ago with type 1. The last few months her behaviour is bad at school and home. I’ve looked into everything that could possibly be bothering her but nothing apparent just unreasonable out bursts of terrible moods swings!! Has anyone else found this to be a problem as I can’t think what else it could be. I know hormones affect levels but do they cause behaviour problems to this extreme?!
Any opinions would be appreciated
 
My mood worsens considerably if I have high blood sugar. Feels like I’m a different person.

I also remember not being a delight to be around at 13! (But didn’t have diabetes then so no excuse :D)

Hope it improves for you soon x
 
As a mother of three daughters, not diabetic and all grown up now thank goodness, thirteen is a terrible age, hormones, peer pressure, attitude! I would say it’s a normal thing but I’m sure some parents of teenage diabetics will be along soon to help you out @Bronco Billy. Good luck, and believe me, you and her will get through it eventually and she will probably turn out to be sweetest natured adult you could wish for. 🙂
 
As a teacher, we used to take our tutor groups through from Y7 to Y11.

At the start of Y9 I steeled myself for the rocky year ahead, every time.
Extra boxes of tissues at the ready. Early arrival in my room in case needed.
The hormones were flowing and it was a case of who would be upset this
week rather than if someone would be. They all ended the year ready for Y10
much more settled and suddenly behaving more like young adults.
The ones that coped best with this were those with a parent who cared.
You have come here looking for help, so that’s you.

The T1 just adds into the mix. As others have said moods rise and fall with glucose levels, and who wants to have to deal with that on top of choosing options, friendship breaks, boyfriends, ...

Just ride the lumpy road with her.
 
eggyg said:
As a mother of three daughters, not diabetic and all grown up now thank goodness, thirteen is a terrible age, hormones, peer pressure, attitude! I would say it’s a normal thing but I’m sure some parents of teenage diabetics will be along soon to help you out @Bronco Billy. Good luck, and believe me, you and her will get through it eventually and she will probably turn out to be sweetest natured adult you could wish for. 🙂
Click to expand...
She is the youngest of my 4 daughters and just never experienced this with them! I know all children are different was just starting to think maybe more the diabetes than just teenage years. I am certainly taking every day as a day closer to her being done with it lol!
 
Alannahxh said:
She is the youngest of my 4 daughters and just never experienced this with them! I know all children are different was just starting to think maybe more the diabetes than just teenage years. I am certainly taking every day as a day closer to her being done with it lol!
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Blimey, your poor hubby! Thought my hubby had it bad, we also have 3 granddaughters and a lone grandson. Is there a big gap between your daughters? The reason I ask is I have noticed my 12 year old granddaughter started her attitude, moodiness etc a lot earlier than her mother for example ( and she was a nightmare) I think a lot is definitely social media, don’t get me wrong I’m a social media addict but obviously as a nearly 59 year old, I really don’t care what anyone thinks of me! Would it be worth one of her sisters speaking to her, she may be having problems at school or with “ friends” and might not want to speak to you about it. It could be rebellion against the diabetes, as I am sure you know, that’s quite common. They’re a worry aren’t they? It doesn’t stop when they leave home and have their own families neither I’m afraid, then you have grandchildren to worry about! 😱
 
Girls are 21, 17, 15 and 13 next month. My eldest did offer to talk but she is just so rude to her it doesn’t go down well! So we back off! One minute she’s friends at school next their not talking I’m embarrassing if I get involved and if I don’t then I don’t care! Lose lose! I think I’m going to talk to the diabetic clinic on Monday and see about having someone for her to talk to. We did have a psychiatrist at clinic that she was starting to talk to but he left so they haven’t currently got one which is a shame as I think it was helping
 
KIDS ? I have been T1 since being 3. I have a boy & girl both not Diabetic. They are both good kids but boy is best. He listens to what you say. & he is 6ft 3. Good luck 🙂
 
Alannahxh said:
Hi,
I wanted to ask if anyone has had a problem with extreme bad behaviour with their child. My daughter is nearly 13 diagnosed 4 years ago with type 1. The last few months her behaviour is bad at school and home. I’ve looked into everything that could possibly be bothering her but nothing apparent just unreasonable out bursts of terrible moods swings!! Has anyone else found this to be a problem as I can’t think what else it could be. I know hormones affect levels but do they cause behaviour problems to this extreme?!
Any opinions would be appreciated
Click to expand...
Teenage hormones and diabetes are a fantastic mix (NOT) so suspect that's the problem. Unfortunately it's sit down time with your daughter and explaining to her what is and isn't acceptable. Good luck 🙂
 
Hi Alannahxh. I’m really sorry to hear that your daughter is having these issues. I know it will be affecting the rest of the family as well.

It sounds to me as if what is happening goes beyond teenage hormones. Has she accepted her diagnosis or have any bad memories from when she was diagnosed? My daughter was 6 when she diagnosed and was very, very ill. I’m convinced her bad memories led to moments of aggression towards her siblings and us a couple of years later before she reached her teens.

I think it’s significant that the psychiatrist seemed to be helping. Maybe you should consider speaking to your team about referring your daughter to CAMHS. We did this, although the referral didn’t lead to anything due to lack of resources, but please don’t let this put you off.

While you are waiting for psychiatric support, there may be something else you can do. We had what could be described as a stroke of luck at the time. Our daughter was a member of the swimming club and the coach asked her to join the B team. This really helped her come to terms with her diagnosis as it had affected her self-esteem and sense of worth. She was swimming as an equal member of the team on an equal basis against girls from other clubs, this helped her realise that type 1 was just something that she had to live with, but it didn’t make her any less of a person than anyone else. She still had a few issues which she received support from the psychologist for, this did help her. If you can find something that gives your daughter something to focus on, something she’s good at and enjoys, this may calm her down.
 
Morning,

You are right about coming to terms with her diagnosis she just doesn’t want to believe she has diabetes or acknowledge that’s its a serious illness that needs to be monitored.
She came back from a weekend with her Nan I think we both benefited from the break! Funny you say about a focus we did speak about joining a club to give her something to do out of school also. She was part of a dance school (ballroom and Latin) and competing at a high level but testing and eating regularly at competitions became an issue with her and she stopped going. Such a shame as she was a natural.
I will be on the phone with the diabetic team today to see if I can get a referral to a psychologist of make contact with the local CAMS team.
 
Morning @Alannahxh

What a worry for you. My son and daughter are now in their 20s and thankfully we survived the teenage years pretty unscathed. This doesn’t mean I didn’t witness the ups and downs of their friends though, goodness me some of them were a challenge at times, all settled down and turned back into lovely young people. If your daughter doesn’t say what’s going on exactly it’s difficult to know.

I was diagnosed when I was 11 and I don’t remember too many issues, but it was a very different era and we are all different and in different situations. I do remember feeling different to everyone else though.

Does your daughter manage her condition herself? I know my mum would ask if i had snacks, had I had something to eat etc., I know she was concerned but when I was a teenager I did find it a bit annoying. ...she still asks me now sometimes...still annoys me🙂

A friend of mine has a daughter who she finds “challenging” at times and her daughter doesn’t like to talk. However she will occasionally text her mum her thoughts and feelings. My friend did write a letter to her daughter telling her how much she loved her, how proud she was of her, how she was always there to support her and listen and how as a mum we are wired to worrry and be concerned...it’s part of the job. This seemed to be a positive move.

Have you discussed a Libre sensor with your team. Less finger pricking and very usueful especially when taking part in activities...quick swipe of the sensor with a phone or reader, nobody notices...and certainly gave me more confidence when out and about, even after all there years.

I hope things get better for you all soon.
 
I seriously would employ any T1 with the right attitude. They ARE survivors & have a battle every day.😉
 
How did the phone call with the team go?

Part of living with diabetes is learning how to handle different situations. After she was diagnosed, we had to learn what worked for my daughter in terms of keeping her numbers stable. We had to learn again for competitions as these were a different kind of physical activity to training sessions. Training was high activity over a sustained period while competitions were short, sharp bursts. She would warm up for 10 minutes then might not have a race for half an hour. There was often a long break between races.

Were the issues centred around not wanting to test in front of people? Has this changed over time? If it has, it might be worth talking to her about getting back into dancing. It’s worth a go even if it hasn’t changed. This may be fuelling her resentment towards type 1, she feels it has stopped her doing something she enjoyed and was good at. If she could do it again, her antipathy towards the condition might decrease. My son swims as well. This evening, he went to his first taekwondo class, which he enjoyed so much, he will probably do this instead of swimming. This is a different type of activity to swimming, so we have more learning to do to find out what works for him when doing taekwondo. Diabetes doesn’t stop anyone doing anything, it would be a real shame if your daughter let it hold her back. Life can still be what she makes it. I don’t know if you are following the six nations rugby tournament, but one of the England players, Henry Slade, has type 1. He has scored three tries on the first two games. Here is an article about him which you may like to show to your daughter.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/r...-one-diabetes-inspiring-haka-came-rescue.html
 
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