Accountability & ambivalence.

[indio02]

Have been feeling a bit low with a complete lack of motivation to do anything for about a week.

Yesterday, made a large bowl of porridge with some currants for breakfast. It tasted surprisingly sweet with the currants. I also had a home made latte made with freshly ground coffee.

About 10am was passing a well known bagel shop on Brick Lane. Haven't been for quite some time so had a slab of Apple Strudel and bought 2 plain freshly made bagels. Had the Strudel with a flat white coffee in Pret. Was thinking of picking up a filling for the bagels but ended up just eating/nibbling them plain for lunch. Had a pret latte mid-afternoon.

Picked up a 400g baguette in Whole Foods Market with a 100g of Mortadella stopped myself buying a 100g bar of chocolate but got a Pret hot chocolate instead. Made a sandwich with half the baguette for supper. Nibbled the other half meaning I ate about 85% of the baguette.

Had a fairly late night. No running/exercise. No fruit or vegetables. My watch says I had a good night's sleep with a score of 88 but I'm still feeling a bit tired.

I quite obviously know that yesterday was completely unacceptably mindless.

I currently don't test my BG that often as it was pretty stable between 4.5 & 5.5 also it was starting to hurt my fingers doing it 4 times everyday.

I decided to do it this morning for obvious reasons. Last food was eaten approx.14hrs ago. First reading 25.6, was so shocked thought it was an error so did it again 30 minutes later and it was 25.8. Seriously thought I was going to drop dead.

Decided to skip breakfast and my morning coffee. After that initial shock I'm getting back on the wagon but I'm surprised there's a background feeling of ambivalence.

I've not told anyone about my diagnosis so this helps.

 

[helli]

I am sorry to read of your struggles.
As I have Type 1, my experience is different but you should get some feedback from some people with type 2 soon.

You mention that finger pricking hurts doing it 4 times a day - unless you have very sensitive fingers, with the right technique, finger pricking should not hurt - I used to prick my finger 10+ times a day without pain ... but I still have feelings in my fingers.
There are some YouTube videos showing the best finger pricking technique but I would suggest the key things are
- adjust the "prick depth" so that it is deep enough to get blood but not so deep that it hurts. All lancet devices will have a dial or something to make this adjustment.
- rotate your fingers. I had a strategy which used each of my fingers on both hands over two days based on times of the day and date. I was probably a little extreme but it is important not to prick the same finger every time and give it a bit of a rest.
- prick the side of the finger not the fleshy pad. The side of the finger is less sensitive.
- make sure your hands are warm before pricking. Blood will flow better through warm fingers so you will not have to prick as deep. I always "cuddle a cuppa" before pricking.

Good luck with your diabetes management. Admitting you need to sort it out is a very big first step.

 

[Martin.A]

Lesson learned, @indio02 ?

 

[rebrascora]

Really sorry to hear that you have been struggling and fell off the wagon quite spectacularly by the sound of it! 😱
Seriously though, how are your levels today? Have they come down to a less concerning level? Are they old test strips which have been open too long and may have degraded?
The fact that both results were so similar suggests not but worth double checking. Generally you are supposed to use a pot within a month once opened I believe.

Do you normally take medication for your diabetes or have you been diet controlled until now?
If levels are still high, are you able to go for a long walk. Drinking plenty of water should also help bring them down. I once hit 27 after eating a whole sharing packet of Jacob's salt and balsamic vinegar crackers when I was first diagnosed and then sat up all night drinking water and weeing to try to bring it down. I was 22 in the morning. That was before I was started on insulin, but I learned a valuable lesson from it that I need to be more disciplined. I knew if I hit 30 I should be seeking medical attention and I was horrified at the prospect of having to attend hospital because I had eaten something I shouldn't. That has more or less kept me on the straight and narrow ever since, although I had half a piece of cake for my friend's birthday the other day and had to inject 7 lots of insulin to deal with it as my levels just kept refusing to come down, so it will be a long time before I do it again.

My gut feeling is that you need assistance with your diabetes management and that if you have been maintaining things in remission through diet and then one day of carb fest sends your levels into orbit, you may not be a straightforward Type 2. If you are unable to maintain your good diabetes management through diet because you are not finding it sustainable, then you need to either find ways to make it sustainable or seek support with medication. If you are already on medication, then maybe additional medication is needed.
When did you last have a diabetes review and what was your HbA1c?