Hi there
I’m Beth. I’m 33 years old and have been in a year long relationship with my partner who is 45 years old and suffers from type 2 diabetes. My partner had an accident 2 years ago which severely damaged his lower spine. He is able to walk but only short distances but is in an incredible amount of pain, since this his health has spiralled out of control with a diagnosed heart murmur and with the limited mobility the weight piled on and diabetes ensued. Not being able to work or go out that often depression set in and he had some counselling but it seems to be ongoing due to his circumstances. I came into his life after meeting over some cottage pie dishes I was selling. I was aware of his health problems and from the start I was with him every step of the way, going to his appointments so I could educate myself and hear what the consultants were saying. He smoked when I first met him and got him to give up which is very positive for his health. We went to weight management clinic about making better food choices and educating himself more about his diabetes condition and things were looking positive and he lost over a stone in weight and I was so proud of him. Then things started to slide and unhealthy habits crept back in. I know we are all human but I have been trying my hardest to get him back on track but to not avail and if I mention it I get called a nag. His mood swings have been awful and he’s got so angry and said so many nasty things to me over the last few months. Lockdown had taken its toll on our relationship and with my own personal dramas it has been very tough on me. My partner also lost 3 close friends too. I just don’t know where to turn. He is angry at everything and snaps at even this most smallest of things like dropping something on the floor And i get it in the neck and I’m biting back and myself am turning into an angry and upset person. I can’t get him to stop eating bad things and if I mention it he flips. We haven’t had sex at all since I met him as diabetes has affected ability to get an erection. We saw a specialist and provided us with an internal cream to try but as of yet I can’t get him to use it and he just says it won’t work. The next option is injection and he flat out refuses but I said there are 2 in this relationship and sex is important for fun and closeness. I get told that that’s all I’m interested in and I made feel like a fool going to see a specialist about it. I also really want a a baby so this is another issue. He says he does too and feels like a letdown. I try to talk to him but it ends up in arguments and I’m crying as he says I don’t understand. Part of it I probably won’t but honestly we need to do something because I am feeling so unhappy and unsure where to turn. I love him but I feel like this is going to break us if we don’t get help and address this. When I mention about getting help he says he’s been there and done that and that no one can help. He has had counselling and spoken to doctors and he’s also still waiting to be medically assessed to get health benefit. He had an appointment last year scheduled and half hour before they cancanclled it after waiting 18months and as of yet nothing rescheduled so he is not getting the help he is entitled too. This is very frustrating and has caused a strain too. Am very disappointed in the whole system! any advice on what to do because I am at my wits end! Thankyou for taking the time to read.
I’m Beth. I’m 33 years old and have been in a year long relationship with my partner who is 45 years old and suffers from type 2 diabetes. My partner had an accident 2 years ago which severely damaged his lower spine. He is able to walk but only short distances but is in an incredible amount of pain, since this his health has spiralled out of control with a diagnosed heart murmur and with the limited mobility the weight piled on and diabetes ensued. Not being able to work or go out that often depression set in and he had some counselling but it seems to be ongoing due to his circumstances. I came into his life after meeting over some cottage pie dishes I was selling. I was aware of his health problems and from the start I was with him every step of the way, going to his appointments so I could educate myself and hear what the consultants were saying. He smoked when I first met him and got him to give up which is very positive for his health. We went to weight management clinic about making better food choices and educating himself more about his diabetes condition and things were looking positive and he lost over a stone in weight and I was so proud of him. Then things started to slide and unhealthy habits crept back in. I know we are all human but I have been trying my hardest to get him back on track but to not avail and if I mention it I get called a nag. His mood swings have been awful and he’s got so angry and said so many nasty things to me over the last few months. Lockdown had taken its toll on our relationship and with my own personal dramas it has been very tough on me. My partner also lost 3 close friends too. I just don’t know where to turn. He is angry at everything and snaps at even this most smallest of things like dropping something on the floor And i get it in the neck and I’m biting back and myself am turning into an angry and upset person. I can’t get him to stop eating bad things and if I mention it he flips. We haven’t had sex at all since I met him as diabetes has affected ability to get an erection. We saw a specialist and provided us with an internal cream to try but as of yet I can’t get him to use it and he just says it won’t work. The next option is injection and he flat out refuses but I said there are 2 in this relationship and sex is important for fun and closeness. I get told that that’s all I’m interested in and I made feel like a fool going to see a specialist about it. I also really want a a baby so this is another issue. He says he does too and feels like a letdown. I try to talk to him but it ends up in arguments and I’m crying as he says I don’t understand. Part of it I probably won’t but honestly we need to do something because I am feeling so unhappy and unsure where to turn. I love him but I feel like this is going to break us if we don’t get help and address this. When I mention about getting help he says he’s been there and done that and that no one can help. He has had counselling and spoken to doctors and he’s also still waiting to be medically assessed to get health benefit. He had an appointment last year scheduled and half hour before they cancanclled it after waiting 18months and as of yet nothing rescheduled so he is not getting the help he is entitled too. This is very frustrating and has caused a strain too. Am very disappointed in the whole system! any advice on what to do because I am at my wits end! Thankyou for taking the time to read.
